MAFS THREAD 10 where you will respect the forum and sit down. Take off your Anorak of Sulk and get your hands out their Uggs. For we shall wear our polo-necks of misery and janitor pyjamas of poetry.

[Dillite2]

The rest of the thread title

"For it's not easy to not get lipsed on the down low without someone getting lippy. Casper is still dying of cringe and Shitlid sees no way out. For we are all scrambling for our dignity, whilst watching the utter mockery"

It was a joint effort by us all.

Well that is interesting. Despite his ickiness, he's coming out as relatively decent so far. As long as he stops talking about sitting on faces etc.

They demanded apologies. James seems to think he is some kind of Laird overlooking a serf and Maeva now carries that status having married into a wealthy family.

I'm glad Miles didn't apologise. The way they spoke to him isn't the right way to approach anyone - even if you are angry. I am much older than all of them (I know...I know, but it's a very guilty pleasure) and I still think and talk about someone I was obsessed with in my twenties. These experiences remain part of you. I wouldn't discuss it in public, but I am from another generation and can think of nothing worse than appearing on a reality show.

Apologies again to MAFSUK viewers for temporarily derailing the thread.

I’ve watched Celebs go Dating (😳) and Paul is an “expert” on that too, equally terrible advice

Interesting!

I'm sure Polly just meant she couldn't understand what he was saying. I don't think she meant it in a racist way.

My son seems to absolutely love him I think he's a pretty decent guy they just show the cringiest parts which he has a lot of 😂😂 I messaged my ex and all he said was "luke doesn't have an easy ride, just keep watching" 🤷🏻‍♀️

Oh no, poor Luke !

It's an odd choice though. The phrase it's all Greek to me is well.known and wouldn't have looked as dodgy. Swahili wouldn't have been the first thing to come to my mind.

Mind you she didn’t accuse him of Swahili, she said am I talking Swahili. I think?

She may not have but it was clumsy and thoughtless.She needs to be aware of how things like that might leave people feeling; their impact might not be what she meant but still be highly damaging - it came across as very insensitive from a white woman to a black man.

Richelle, while she did say incredibly nasty things like ‘cretin’ wasn’t anything like as explosive and sweary as Sasha and Polly but her hostile reactions did earn her an enormous amount of vicious wrath on social media. It does make you think about tropes and their impact.

@murasaki is this you?

Ooh!

Take it to the Spoilers thread please - I'm trying to stay strong and resist looking!

Prolly did say “am I speaking Swahili?”
I did think it was an odd choice and wondered why that language popped into her head.

no one else see Kristen upset at Kieran kissing polly at dinner party?

🤣🤣 Actually i never use the phrase as I have a degree in Ancient Greek...

🤣

In my neck of the woods, that's a saying (or at least it was 30 years ago!) It wasn't a completely random thing to say although most people have clocked on that it isn't appropriate.

Tbh I've been known to use that expression, and the thought of a racial undercurrent hadn't even entered my head. I'm not even sure why Swahili myself, but the sense is 'language none of us knows a single word of', for me anyway. Can't speak for Polly, of course.

I've also heard Swahili used in that context. And I suspect Polly was in no state of mind to consider her words when she said it. Not that that means it couldn't be offensively used or heard in that way of course.

Oh ok , it seems to be more common than I knew. I don't think she was being racist actually, but the optics still weren't good. But if it's a phrase she uses normally, there's no difference between her saying it to Alex or, for example Shitlid.

no one else see Kristen upset at Kieran kissing polly at dinner party? I did @Pinkfluffypencilcase and my heart went out to her. She's got so much to contend with and she's so understanding of Kieran (too much so perhaps) that this looks like a real slap in the face. The cold sore magically ok and he's kissing somone else on the lips! Poor Kristina.

Just catching up on last night. Much as I dislike Alex, I'm enjoying him winding Polpot up!

Still to watch but have read most of the thread.

Each to their own of course but I haven’t enough hours in the day to find offence in various comments.

I’d never dare to get out of my bed, let alone my house.

I’ve heard most slurs. I’ve received abuse at my work, at school and nearly everywhere else. The only place where I have not was in the forces.

I’ve also heard comments frequently which some might call offensive/racist/‘unconsciously biased’. For me, offence lies not just with words but also depends on tone and intent. Mostly they are just questions, although perhaps not wrapped up in a society pleasing bow.

I’m long enough in the tooth to not care anymore if someone says something questionable which lacks malice. You’ll hear me screaming like a banshee if the malice is evident.

I won’t be screaming today.

I will also add that I don’t think Alex is getting negative editing or whatever because of his skin. He is looking bad because he is an arse. Thankfully the men I know do not act like that.

I commend Polly and Sacha for standing up to him. I suspect he hasn’t come across that often.

Agree about intent. And as I’ve said in my workplace before I can’t react to everything otherwise it’s exhausting.

I think I agree that the phrase was a common one but it still made me pause.

Yeah it used to be a common saying because Swahili is difficult to learn I think 🤷🏻‍♀️