I MAY DESTROY YOU - mon and tue bbc 1045

[Blondeshavemorefun]

New dram series starts tonight on bbc 1

With only hours left to deliver a draft of a book to her publishers , writer Arabella is tempted into a night out with a friend ........

the series is set in London and centers around the story of a young woman who must rebuild her life after her drink is spiked with a date rape drug

@PerditaProvokesEnmity

Well, the thread consensus appears to be that Theo and Nilufer are the most attractive, important and victimised characters ...

Perdita, we have all agreed we think Nilufer is 'twat' 🤷🏽‍♀️ .. and Theo.

I get that this crosses over with the BLM age but I think you are seeing issues that aren't there.

This is such a thought provoking nice post, let's not derail it with veiled accusations of subconscious racism.

I'm saying this as a non 'white British' woman who has lives your other views and thoughts in this post.

Lots of typos there .. *loved I haven't 'lives' your other posts 😆

Yes just to clarify that I also dislike Nilufer and obviously disagree with what she says but I don’t understand how her being a twat means she warrants a horrible death when there’s rapists featuring galore in this show and when the person who wants Nilufer to die a violent death is also glorifying a seriously nasty dude (who also happens to be white btw)

But I don't agree that Nilufer is merely a 'twat'. I think she is poisonous. You don't have to agree with me.

People have fallen over themselves to defend these two women. I cannot draw a firm conclusion because I am puzzled by it - and wonder what Michaela Cole anticipated when she wrote them.

She'd certainly be a good choice for one of MNHQ's online interviews ...

I find Bella annoying too, though I appreciate the journey she is on and dawning realisation, having been there myself. I find the silliness and schoolgirl thing she has going on with Terry very annoying. Especially in the police station - who would muck about like that about the female officers pregnancies when going in to discuss a rape case!! I do think it is part of her journey though. I remember being young and carefree at university thinking oh there's no need for feminism anymore, I'm just the same as the boys and can go out and enjoy myself just the same as they can now. How wrong I was.

Why can’t you explain just why she is ‘poisonous’? I think Theo is pretty poisonous as an adult actually but we see her back story which explains some of it. Still pretty out of order to accuse people who disagree with you of being racists just because the characters are white. For instance the guy who raped Kwame is way worse than Nilufer but no mention of horrible deaths there. I also personally really like Kwame and he has been through a really horrible ordeal but I can also see why Nilufer is pissed off when he says he’s gay after he just slept with her. Using other people to work out your own confusions and traumas isn’t great, but I do understand why he did it.

@NewNewt

I find Bella annoying too, though I appreciate the journey she is on and dawning realisation, having been there myself. I find the silliness and schoolgirl thing she has going on with Terry very annoying. Especially in the police station - who would muck about like that about the female officers pregnancies when going in to discuss a rape case!! I do think it is part of her journey though. I remember being young and carefree at university thinking oh there's no need for feminism anymore, I'm just the same as the boys and can go out and enjoy myself just the same as they can now. How wrong I was.

Yes, it's the silliness that's annoying me. I think someone earlier on in the thread said that she was supposed to be 32 and that's where my opinions started to shift.

I've always thought people who take drugs over the age of 30, go from 'cool and edgy' (if they ever were) to a 'bit tragic and need to grow the fuck up'. Just my opinion - don't shoot me!

Michaela Coel's 32 and someone made the point if her and Terry were around 15 in 2004 they'd be in their early 30s by now too.

Yeah, they’re definitely not kids. Simon appears to have a city-job and his girlfriend is a teacher or something. Being an influencer and getting off your face when you’re in your early 20s might seem great but when you’re still doing it 10 years later it’s not so good.
Agree that the immature antics at the police station were stupid. I don’t think any of these characters are likeable but that’s probably the intention. It does expose quite a nasty side of humanity. I thought that about Fleabag too. She was so selfish and spoilt but so many people I knew said that they could totally relate to her. To be fair, I have experienced so many selfish people so I can see why many do relate to characters like this and there are so many elements of true life there.

@PerditaProvokesEnmity

But I don't agree that Nilufer is merely a 'twat'. I think she is poisonous. You don't have to agree with me.

People have fallen over themselves to defend these two women. I cannot draw a firm conclusion because I am puzzled by it - and wonder what Michaela Cole anticipated when she wrote them.

She'd certainly be a good choice for one of MNHQ's online interviews ...

Who has fallen over themselves to defend Nulifer? I only noticed quite a strong defence with Terry. Maybe I've misses it upthread.

I was really looking forward to watching this but I lost interest halfway through the first episode and gave up. I didn't like the acting and found it a bit odd. I think it must be me!

So you wanted the character to have a horrible death because of a made up idea of yours? (Not one person said either character was important, attractive, let alone the most. Some said they were victimised - but no one said the the most.)

Also didn't you, when you posted your death wish, say that you hadn't read the thread as you were still watching (at the bit where Kwame and her were walking home). So you have wouldn't know the general consensus.

Makes very little sense and you're now coming across fake woke.

What an extraordinary campaign to shout down someone expressing their opinion on an imaginary character ...

I hope the screenplay is released as a book in the same way Fleabag was.

There is so much nuance and I'd love to know how much is planned and what is down to the actors' interpretation.

The way we are picking this apart like sixth form English Lit students is hilarious. Every look and gesture might be significant or it could be the actor doing it on the spur of the moment.

Nobody is driving you off the internet but your thinly veiled accusations of racism aimed at others are really off.

Also maybe work on why you allow men to get away with stuff that you don’t think is okay for women just because you have ‘lower expectations’ of men. It’s not great.

Hmm ... It's a pity, Shedtheload that you resolutely misunderstand everything I write. I have no idea what you mean.

I'm baffled by the world of influencers but now it seems to be a means to make a precarious living out of. I wonder what she did before the original book deal. When I was younger a lot of the people I went clubbing with were a bit older and were still out there taking party drugs even though they had kids so I'm not judging that way.

One of the main threads of the shows is about Bella and Terry's friendship and they go way back and ignite each other's silliness the way only best friends can. The friendship itself seems now to be in a fragile position. Terry clearly doesn't trust Theo so I think any fault-lines between Bella and her could push Bella into relying on Theo, whose motivations seem ambiguous.

I'm rambling now!

To be fair, when I reflect on other shows, I sometimes say offhandly say "I hope he/she dies" if they're even mildly annoying. But that's been more in shows where violence and death is frequent (e.g. Queen of the South) and obviously I don't deeply mean it.

But saying it for this show does seem weird because the show has a completely different tone, i.e there isn't excessive death. There is some sexual violence but it's effective and evokes emotion so we aren't desensitized to it.

Actually I get what your saying now Perdita. I don’t generally wish death on TV characters, but I do when I’m reading. If a character in a book bullies a child/teenager I start hoping for their comeuppance, it annoys me if it doesn’t happen. And yes I was bullied as a child/teen.

@louise5754

Hi. When in the meeting with the editor and Arabella first mentioned Zayn raped her was she imagining saying it? As no one mentioned it.

What he did with the condom was awful but was it rape? The video was shared on social media was that fair?

I can't believe their have been 3 threesomes mentioned already.

I'm rewatching them all as I think I've missed bits.

I would consider it assault/rape if a man removed a condom without consent during sex, when the sex was conditional on them wearing a condom.

Un-protective sex can lead to STIs and pregnancy - a pretty bid deal don't you think?

Arabella luckily found out and was able to take the MAP, so hopefully didn't get pregnant, I think think that's pretty shit she had to do that just because Zains pleasure/preference was more important?
Presumably if she hadn't have found out she would have had to have an abortion or continue with the unplanned pregnancy, again things that are a pretty big deal and of massive consequence.

Now can you see it? @louise5754?

@louise5754

Hi. When in the meeting with the editor and Arabella first mentioned Zayn raped her was she imagining saying it? As no one mentioned it.

What he did with the condom was awful but was it rape? The video was shared on social media was that fair?

I can't believe their have been 3 threesomes mentioned already.

I'm rewatching them all as I think I've missed bits.

I would consider it assault/rape if a man removed a condom without consent during sex, when the sex was conditional on them wearing a condom.

Un-protective sex can lead to STIs and pregnancy - a pretty bid deal don't you think?

Arabella luckily found out and was able to take the MAP, so hopefully didn't get pregnant, I think think that's pretty shit she had to do that just because Zains pleasure/preference was more important?
Presumably if she hadn't have found out she would have had to have an abortion or continue with the unplanned pregnancy, again things that are a pretty big deal and of massive consequence.

Or she could have just caught clamidia and become infertile. Or HIV, etc etc etc.

Now can you see it? @louise5754

The Zain thing in the publisher/agent meeting was confusing (intentionally, it seemed) - if I remember correctly she said something like, "I was raped, I know the rapist's name... Zain Surname... has been working with me on my book" etc.
I could be wrong but that's why it seemed like she seemed to expose him then but either was toying with him, changed her mind or just said it ambiguously.