I MAY DESTROY YOU - mon and tue bbc 1045

[Blondeshavemorefun]

New dram series starts tonight on bbc 1

With only hours left to deliver a draft of a book to her publishers , writer Arabella is tempted into a night out with a friend ........

the series is set in London and centers around the story of a young woman who must rebuild her life after her drink is spiked with a date rape drug

And yes it's rape, or at least non-consensual.
This whole series is about different experiences of "consent". It does seem like what's clear-cut to some is a grey area for others. I think it's well done.

@dorthopa

*I think she behaved like a creep with Biagio. If it had happened the other way round and he had let himself in to her house after they had split up and ordered a pizza delivery and sounded like he had no plans of leaving people would think he was a dangerous creep. I don't see why people like her * I DO like Bella but I do agree with all this and don't think there were any other underlying reasons why he locked her out. He was freaked out, he didn't want her there, he didn't ask her to be there or give ANY signs of wanting to be with her.

I think his reaction to the rape was awful, he's quite a pious character which is an odd trait for a drug dealer, he looks down on those he deals to, including Bella, he was fascinated by her but disgusted by the messiness of her life.

I think Bella going to Italy on a whim and letting herself in was part of her trauma reaction. I have been massively traumatised and massively let down by an ex partner at the same time. It rocked my world and I reacted in some extreme ways due to feeling out of control and let down

To those that say biagio as a dealer has no right to be looking down on Bella, there's a hierarchy everywhere, even on the streets, dealers of certain drugs look down on dealers of others. They all look down on their customers.
Also, traditionally, Italian men are very traditional, she is the complete antithesis of the sort of woman he'd have likely married had his life turned out differently.

Here's an old clip about the class system. It exists in every type of social group, even here on this microcosm of a thread. You can leapfrog into different 'classes' or subgroups, even if you don't meet the criteria if you have other positives , such as beauty, hence biagio still being described as a lovely potential partner despite the fact he deals drugs, sells a gun and is clearly entrenched in crime annd has no empathy, compassion or respect for the woman he's sleeping with.
Imm sure if biagio didn't look the way he does, opinion on here would be very different.
I think he's hot af, just for the record. But ii wouldn't want him as my bf. Altho I have had many bfs of his ilk in my youth. Scary times
www.facebook.com/thejohncleese/videos/1870718759725920/?extid=QyQkGDOHLhddaQRP&d=null&vh=e

Yeah I never understood the Biagio love on here.
He's a lovely looking man, and maybe we can't help but want Bella to find love.
But he had a gun with him to threaten her away (instead of just being straight with her when they spoke)
You got have to point a gun at someone's head to threaten them - most normal folk (eg everyone who isn't in an action movie) would shit their load if they saw a gun/knife/baseball bat being held by Biagio.

One pp suggested that there might be a load of gangsters hidden in his bedroom that why he had the gun - no he's just a deal-dealing cunt!

I think the pp who has been slagging off Ks female date was offended by the homophobic remarks (fair enough, they were offensive) but I'm guessing the wishing them dead is to do with the anti-trans remark?

I can't see why that offensive remark carries the death penalty and none of the other offensive things that have happened do?

Re Theo, I expect she was experienced more sexual abuse etc since school. A lot of women have, and she is very vulnerable.
I actually thought the envelopes of money were because she was dealing to her attendees of the group? But I guess I was wrong?

(So ... MN very kindly preserved my earlier post so it can be c&p here without the thankfully deleted troll hunting. Sorry it's a bit out of sync now.)

I have never, to my knowledge, known any convicted rapists; I have never to my knowledge known any gay, male rapists; I have never to my knowledge known any teenage girls who set out to destroy a boy's whole life. Etc. And assume it may be taken for granted that I despise such people. I have known women like Nilufer. (And men - but as a woman I am naturally more wary of men and less disappointed when their behaviour and attitudes are abhorrent.) Her racist fetishisation really hits a nerve if one has seen it before.

I do find it fascinating that I am apparently not supposed to express that here. I May Destroy You was written (superbly) by a black woman. But some of you clearly want to discuss it without acknowledging that the events and experiences conveyed might have more significance for some viewers than they do for you. The energy that has been spent, on this thread, centring, defending and explaining the white characters - and attacking me for finding their behaviour horrifying, is quite unbelievable.

I've been on millions of threads, some long running, where we all cheerfully wish painful deaths on objectionable characters - male and female. I've never had people trying to drive me off the internet before!

I'm starting 'chewing gum' ... how have I never seen this! It's hilarious.

i was thinking of watching Chewing Gum too on the basis of this

It is actually hilarious! .. why didn't I find this before?!

I'm not ignoring your post @PerditaProvokesEnmity, your lived experiences are different from mine, therefore so are your opinions. I totally respect that and don't want to derail this ace thread.

Do it @CrowdedHouseinQuarantine it's make me laugh like The Inbetweeners did in its heyday!

'I'm starting 'chewing gum' ... how have I never seen this! It's hilarious.'

Fabulous, isnt it? I've been rewatching it since I started 'I May Destroy You'. Complrtely different tone but the writing is equally brilliant. Shes one talented woman

She’s amazing in Black Earth Rising too. Definitely not a comedy though

Just finished both seasons of chewing gum ... fantastic!

Chewing Gum is great

I was finding this an interesting and engaging series until the part in episode 2 where she attends the SARC. There was so much wrong that it would be quicker to say what was right. The nurse was kind. That's it. That was ok. You don't have multiple victims in the waiting room together at once. Errm forensics! Also if someone was bleeding like one of them was she wouldn't be left in a blood soaked gown for all to see. I just don't know why something that could have had equal power and impact by being correct had be done so badly. It's hard enough to get people to understand that attending a SARC can be a positive and proactive experience and not like sitting in Nando's with every man and his dog there with you.

but that was episode 1 or 2, keep trying @CodenameLevonelle, it's just tv

@CodenameLevonelle

That scene didn't sit well with me either.

Anyone seen today’s episodes yet?

Fantastic writing, so much to unpack in every episode but never feels forced.

Was it Aunty El at her dad’s house?

What does everyone think about doxing? I feel it is open to abuse and could put vulnerable people in danger. But I can also see that Bella can’t rely on the police and legal system to provide any justice at all.

I thought they were the most interesting episodes yet. I liked the way they examined the cancel culture that's so prevalent at the moment.

Was it Aunty El at her dad’s house?

Yes I think so.

Two really good episodes. Poor Bella still spiraling. It looks like she may be getting her memory back. And now I'm having doubts about Ben...

On a totally shallow note, I loved their Halloween costumes.

I know Sunset, he featured too much in the past two episodes to be good! I really do hope it's not the case.

I thought it was interesting that guy in the flashback changed to a rotation of other people this time and yes, something not quite right about Ben's presence now.

It was finny how last time we were wondering if she would make it off the sea and it didn't merit a mention! The direction this is going constantly surprises me.

I am so glad Kwame got a hug!

*Make it out of the sea, I mean.

Did you see where she had a flashback of Simon standing over her?

Yes, Ben's presence has 'shifted' somewhat hasn't it.

I loved Kwame's Grindr date.

Episode 9 seemed to explore her seeing everything in black and white, episode 10 seemed to be about acceptance that people were flawed and made mistakes .. but could be forgiven .

Did you see where she had a flashback of Simon standing over her?

Yes, there were several different mens' faces weren't there? I hope this doesn't mean there were multiple rapists.