Keeeeeep cooking! It's Masterchef The Professionals Thread 2

[Halsall]

The story so far: Scotch egg disaster: monkfish mayhem. Will there be foam, soil, smear and/or crumb?

Now read on.....

What's with the face tattoos

koosed
We're theorising that it means that they have murdered someone in prison/ murdered someone in a gang war/ shanked a guard in the recreation room of Shadwell nick/joined the Yakuza by invitation / something similar - as chefs they'd have the knife skills.

It is possible that our speculations are incorrect, obviously, and they are just tossers . . .

@SchadenfreudePersonified Oh definitely murder.

I'm glad that you agree with us koosed. It seems pretty straightforward and obvious.

MrsTommyBanks
Thinking of you and your family for tomorrow

MrsTommy

Also - I won't be joining you tonight (or tomorrow) as out effing digibox has shut itself down AGAIN and there is no engineer available till Thursday.

I HATE YOU, RICHARD BRANSON - AND I WILL BE AVENGED!!!!!!!

Sorry - that should say MrsTommy

(See what the prospect of a night without Masterchef does to me)

For you and your family MrsTommy

Ditch Virgin Schaden I have freeview with a Youview box and have enough TV to last me a lifetime. I don't do gaming, film nights or box sets though and tend to catch up with the likes of GOT on Youtube. tight arse

Checking in for claws galore

Hope today went as well as it can do MrsTommy

Monica was lovely this evening on the One Show.

Do not read this thread people :

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/3427364-have-you-ever-gone-off-a-celebrity-because-of-something-they-ve-done

Love for Gregggggggggg and hate for Marcus. The world has gone mad I tell you.

I CANNOT BELIEVE GREGG WALLACE HAS SPREAD HIS SEED.
(absolutely not envy)

I'm so bored waiting for 8pm

Love for Gregg

Fucking. Told. You.

What's with all the Gregg hate?

You must be new to these parts spread

Don't worry, we'll help you see the error of your ways

Finally here in real-time this week as I’ve been working and having to watch on catch up since the first episode. (Oh the joys of being a chef 😩😂)

What ho squoosh! I can see you

Well for starters, Gregggggggg is an annoying talking clock who thinks chocolate and ginger do not go together (he was horrified). He is not a chef nor a critic but passes judgement after stuffing a spoon in its entirety into his gob.

What ho, fellow Mastercheffians fourquenelles and halsall.

Has affection for Gregg been sneaking in whilst I've been elsewhere?

Gorn to the dogs

But, but, he is a critic.. as in he criticises chefs' cooking..? What would make him more qualified than anyone else? Is there a critic school he should have gone to?

I believe dislike should be aimed at that Pertwee fella

He wears a baker boy cap
He gurns like Les Dawson
He's very annoying
He flirts with the younger female contestants
He's a talking clock
He treats women his own age like old dears
He has a face like an overboiled suet pudding
All he can talk about is the time
He is Gregg Wallace

squoosh is in da house Marcus is in the cellar , all's right with the world

Good evening to all

Oh that will be controversial spreadmarmz, he's got a few fans round these 'ere parts.

squoosh I can almost imagine that sung to the tune of 'My Old Man's a Dustman'

Hahah it's the pauses between descriptions that make me cringe to my boots!