Made In Chelsea. Are you ready to pardy?

[squoosh]

MIC is like back on Monday boi yah.

Are Tiny Tears and Poundland Fonz still totes in love? Will Toff continue to tussle with Tiff? Will Sam continue to make my toes curl? Will Proudlock continue to dress like Beau Brummell - The Studio 54 Years? Will Biscuits finally admit to his lust for Spenny? Will Spenny's philandering ways culminate in a jaunt to his local clap clinic? Will Binky finally brush her hair?

Let's find out.

Who ever said Lauren was a 'fembot' was spot on! She has a really ugly personality. I can't wait till spenny gets caught shagging some one else.

Nicola needs to fuck off and is out of her league. The pouting and demanding new clothes shows that she is skint!

I rec josh has potential to be an abusive twat!

Where the hell is like lucy?

Lucy will be back. She's been seen filming with the cast.

Sheldoneque, yet again, I am on same page. Lauren is a smug biyatch, but on bright side, looking at Spennys face when permanent single Jamie whatshisface said 'you are so living together'... her days are numbered, numbered I tell ya.

Dont fuck the help!! God i missed that one! Something compelling about her unashamed bitchiness tho, she is what she is and take it or leave it. Her and ... (oh god whats his name, the rich gay one who has a housekeeper in old stylee maid's outfit???) are like the evil double act muppets in the balcony.

And Josh is a control freak borderline psycho, 'clear drinks only and only 8 girls, no more': who'd have thought it?

Sqoosh your descriptions are so on the ball. That is exactly what Fleurs hair is like.

I only started watching MIC when they were in New York so am playing serious catch up with who shagged who. Who did Jamie storm off to confront while in New York. I can't even recall if it was a male or female. Can anyone shed any light on this for me? And how do they all stay friends with their exes. Is it because they are being paid too?

Feck

In New York, Jamie got a text to say that his ex-gf, and "love of his life" Tara had hooked up with Alex Mytton (Binky's ex). That's who he stormed off to confront and there's a clip of him that's been used quite a few times crying and shouting "fuck off back to London, I hate you!". Same occasion.

I felt sorry for biscuits then!
Lauren kind of wafts around like Margot Leadbetter.
Josh's flat looks like he lifted it straight from a DFS showroom

Thank you Queen bean. Was she really the love of his life? Don't think he's been with anyone since asaicr. Aww I feel sorry for him now. Kindof.

I have to say I envy all of their self esteem. They are all so self assured and never seem to have a crisis of confidence or get embarrassed.

Louise said Tara was the love of his life but Jamie is pretty loose with his emotions so could be / might not be. She was definitely his longest term relationship.

Just to be clear, he stormed off to confront Mytton.

Who is a pantomime villain in the form of an Andrex puppy.

No idea how they all stay friends with their exs / sleep with the same girls as their friends / are so friendly with partners exes. I always think that of TOWIE too. How are none of them eaten up by insecurity and jealousy?

They all sleep with each other and swap girlfriends - LUCY been with most of them

Saying that always thought LUCY and Jamie were good together and well matched and Jamie only stopped seeing her as his best mate spenny didn't like it

Then again when mic started spennys best mate was Hugo and they didn't ever have an episode for about 3/4 series when they werent always together - till spenny kisses hugos girlfriend (think Millie)

Jess reminds me of the actress from The Hand that Rocks the Cradle, Rebecca de Mornay I think.

Nicola is like the missing member of Atomic Kitten. Why can't she buy her own clothes, the scuffer?

I liked when Mark Francis said Josh's trunk looked like 'an animal's coffin.' Josh is horrible with psychotic eyes.

Lauren looks about 40 to me. Her face is úeculiarly frozen. Did someone say upthread she is 23? As if.

Has Legohead had his hairline lowered? It looks like his hair is growing from the middle of his forehead.

Good to see pint sized gormless faced Fonz is back next week.

Who's legohead again? It took me forever to figure out who tiny tears and biscuits were

Mytton. His hair isn't as bad now though to be fair. I think he's quite hot .

Spenny never kissed Millie!!

or did hugo do the dirty with spennys girlfriend - hugo think was seeing millie

having a blonde moment

Lauren looks about 40, acts like a really smug bitch to the other girls and is boring the tits off Spenny with her dinner-rather-than-pardying ways. She is so humourless about her bitchiness as well. I give it 2 more weeks. Can't wait to see her face when she finds out he has shagged someone else. He just can't help himself.

If he does shag someone else all Lauren will do is blink a little bit and then re-set her her operating system back to smug simpering fembot mode.

Did any of you catch Spennie's bouffant? the first scene of the ballet catching him and fembot posing? No if you can, have a look, again. his hair is proper Don Johnson, and then in the next scene it's been flattened down a bit - somebody must've had a word.

They were both particularly repulsive this week.

Fembot is turning stepford.

HmmSpenny is going to get bored with her PDQ.
He needs some drama to stay interested -ideally a duel with an ex who still wants her.
Its all in the chase then hes bored.

Prediction - he's been texting Lucy dodgy messages and she'll be back soon to ruin their relationship and win in general. Steph needs Lucy right now!!

Lucy to win! You're going DOWWWWWNNNN Smugbot.....

Going off Twitter I think fembot and spennny are still on although on twitter she is starting to get a bit of shit

Just watched this weeks.

Mark Francis - hilarious as usual.
WTF is going on with Binks! - she looks like she has scrubbed her face and has spots on her cheeks
Steph looks like she and Lulu share a surgeon.
Jess has "just fucked " hair- all knotty at the back
Agree Nicola is sooo an ex member of atomic kitten - annoying- get rid!
Stevie - cant you afford a haircut ????
Steph dump Josh - Steeeeevie loves you !

Has the budget been cut??? - they all look a bit rough!
Lauren- is a bloody cow and so frozen

LUUUUCAAAAAY WATSOOOOON we need you !

sazzle - I did the muppet test once and came out as Statler - one of your balcony muppets. Although I claim I'm Astoria.

I think we should see Gianna with Mark Francis more! Although 'don't fuck the help' is one of my favourite mic phrases (along with getting up in my grill), I can't quite imagine MF getting jiggy with Gianna...

I've never had fuckee hair. I haven't lived.

I still can't get over princess Nicola demanding a new wardrobe. Grabby bint.

We have never needed Lucy more. I would bloody love Lauren to have Lucy right up in her grill and Luce needs to sort out Josh while she's at it. Preferably not getting in his grill but dumping the contents of a grill pan on his couch.

Good to see in the trailer that Tiny Tears is in full flow and the fonz bloke she hooked up with, are his eyes just the teensiest bit too close together, do you think? Certainly something not quite right, there

Gianna was on temporary loan from his papa. Gave MF a good reason to show off inspeak Italian.