X Factor Results! Will it be a fat full milk with extra vanilla free cornflake for all? Or something that makes actual sense?

[SuePurblybiltbyElves]

Who can tell?

I am going with Chowmein and Rylan at the bottom tonight. And will be sticking fingers in my ears throughout Rhianna.

[MsElleTow]

Where do the judges go down those corridors? They only have 3 minutes?

[chipstick10]

James thinks he's so alternative and credible, he's just not.

[BOFingSanta]

I'm losing the will to live. I just read that link- how the fuck is Christipher topping the vote every week?

[GeraldineAubergine]

I think Rhianna is like a gravy boat full of shreddies gently floating on a lake of goats milk. Sprinkled with crack.

[CuriousMama]

There were loads of negative comments on FB regarding nanfucker and his attitude towards Ella. He's not very popular at the moment. Plus this thing about the cruise girl he allegedly tried to kill?

[orangeone]

Nanfucker singing FerNANdo...... Seriously X Factor production ARE reading this thread! Too much of a coincidence surely!!!

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Lets get it off

[jessiegeesusinamanger]

Oh Rylan says if he gets through to the semis he will literally die. So that rules his chances of winning out then.

[chipstick10]

Rufous hound and louis from one d tweeting that nanfucker is not a nice guy

[FellowshipOfFestiveFellows]

katie are you referring to the competition being wide open, or Dullisa's legs?

[we3kingsoforientRaahh]

Can we see Chowmein's mum again. She was class.

[LineRunner]

Hello I have just got off the phone to my nan.

No, not really. She's dead.

[GreenyEyes]

Just think though.

How many other victims have there been who haven't lived to tell us their tale

[squishyotter]

C'MON Ladies, pick your phone up:

09020 50 51 01

Is the only number you need

[Katiekitty]

Fellow wide open as a box of Frosties is on a busy Tuesday morning, while the semi-skimmed has lost its lid.

[BloominMarvellous]

Have I missed something about nanfucker being horrible to Ella? I read up thread?

[GeraldineAubergine]

I cannot believe nanfucker wasn't in brookside. He's like jimmy cork hills fatter, sweatier brother.

[Katiekitty]

Line sorry for your dead nan situation

[SuePurblybiltbyElves]

Laptop died then
In the lull of re-plugging in, I had two thoughts.

one - did Louis say of Chowmein 'He took Abba to the church and won'? If so, what the actual friff? He drunk?

two - do you remember when doing the same thing every week (eg bringing out your guitar and being angsty) was NOT called 'James Arther-ing something, but was being a 'one-trick pony'. Remember that? Was all over Spiky Poo's year.

[jessiegeesusinamanger]

Chowmein's Mum - do you think she was serious about that hair do yesterday or was it a post-modern take on 70's children's TV presenters?

[we3kingsoforientRaahh]

oh- it's the 'oooff' song.
DD1 likes this. She is 6- is it too late to get her adopted?

[LineRunner]

I think we are meant to admire his professionalism. Funnily enough, I don't.

[GreenyEyes]

I've been thinking this sing was The Police for weeks

[FellowshipOfFestiveFellows]

Loving your work katie
I'm going to sleep now while Bruno Bores is on.

This sounds like a Police song. Total rip off.

[MsElleTow]

DS1 is back, he must have ran fast tonight. He walked in as Nanfucker was on in the recap and his face was like , he said "has he escaped from Benidorm?"

He hates the XFactor, and the thought of Rhianna has not even convinced him to stay, he has gone to lift some weights!