Just a friendly hand hold for any other mums of teens PART 2

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

Again, just a friendly place to liaise (or lament?!) with other parents who are trying their best to navigate the ups and downs of raising teens 😳

no judgy pants here so don’t worry about that!

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

I’ll start.

Im a mum of 3 teens, including an autistic teen.

sometimes we do ok, sometimes I pull my hair out.

mostly I just feel really ill Equipped for the job and peddle so hard my wee leggies don’t know if they’re conning or going 😃

[bendmeoverbackwards]

Thanks for the new thread @Pleasegivemeyourwisdom what a friendly supportive group.

My 16 year old dd is currently out of school and quite possibly going through autistic burnout 😢

[Eddyraisins]

Thank you for the thread.

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

Oh no, autistic burn out is the worst :-(

have you / she got any support?

[justwatchingtelly]

Can I join? My 13 year old is making me pull my hair out...

[areyouhavinglaugh]

A great thread kept me going through the worst of it, he's 19 now a bit better but my god you know when he's home!

Have another waiting in the wings.. 😬

[Aarrggh]

Just found this thread and would like to join please!

DS15 is vile, disrespectful and I am at a loss as to what to do and say. I find I just ignore him now. Everything is my fault.

Doesn’t do anything at home, is vile to his sister. Only says something normal when he wants something, has come to ask me to order something and because I said no I would order it tomorrow has called me names ( won’t be ordering it tomorrow). I definitely walk on eggshells as I want to avoid confrontation because then it’s even worse.

No one I can tell in real life because I feel such a failure. Is it bad that I’m counting the years until he moves out? I miss the little boy with the cheeky smile, who wanted snuggles on the sofa.

[DarkChocHolic]

Problem shared is problem halved...
Joining in!

[Bobsledgirl]

Joining in.

[AlwaysSomethingWithTeens]

Relatively calm at the moment - but know that won't last so joining part 2 to be ready!!

[Knackeredmommy]

Thank you! Just packed off 18yo to uni, thought that was stressful, then my 16 yo threw me a curveball and had a MH crisis. It's just me and them at home, I'm anxious, exhausted and trying to keep everything calm for both of them. I start my own counselling this week. Xx

[belge2]

Longtime lurker and poster here. DD17 who hates me. Makes my life a total misery. Exhausting, heartbreaking and totally broken by it. It's been like this for probably 2 years with the last few months being horrific. Glad to find this thread where we can show solidarity!

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

It’s just unbelievable to me how many of our kids think they can treat us like dirt and we’ll just take it without any consequence as to how we will feel about them? If that makes sense

[belge2]

@Aarrggh I hear you totally. If I could move out tomorrow or make my 17DD move out tomorrow I would. It's so bad and toxic. I have spent the evening hiding in my room as I am so upset by it all. My middle son 19 is away at Uni and I miss his calm demeanour. My 21 DS is no help whatsoever ! Useless DH which is all part of the problem.

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

My daughter has just upset the whole apple cart tonight - causing her brothers to lose their peace too - all because she didn’t want to get out of the bath / wrap up for bedtime: she’s horribly rude, entitled, patronising and seems unprepared to be reasonable. She does my box in and now my husband and I are at loggerheads too.

great, just great.

[Flyhigher]

Bloody hell. Mine is a bit better today. Really upset and depressed (quite rightly) with a toxic friend ruining her birthday. But as a consequence a bit nicer to us. Or at least I feel sorry for her and think she's right to be upset. X

[Bobsledgirl]

Oh it’s hard. I miss her being little. And loving me.

[Pleasegivemeyourwisdom]

I miss that too!

[Thethingswedoforlove]

found you all…..

[Flyhigher]

@Bobsledgirl yessss. That's exactly it.

[Flyhigher]

@Pleasegivemeyourwisdom which one is autistic?

[incognito50me]

"I find it hard to adapt to how she wants to be a teen."
This is very apt, @Flyhigher . I did not have a sister, so I can't compare, but - and this is absolutely my problem, and I need to deal with it - I find it a boneheaded way to be a teen: let's find the least common denominator and do all the shallow, least interesting things, while rejecting our parents' values.

[ricecakesareshit]

Hello autumnal parents!

[RhubarbFairy]

Can I join? My eldest isn't quite a teen yet (12). But chuck in all the hormonal changes along with his ADHD and we're well into the thick of it.

[Flyhigher]

@incognito50me I listened a bit to parents and watched them. She is just always out. So you can't learn anything