Where do you wish you had raised your teenagers?

[CowboyHat]

We have a 3 year old and a 6 year old DD and currently live in zone 1 London. My husband works for a company that has offered him a role in Cheltenham. He’s keen because he thinks it would be a great place to raise kids and we could afford a house with a garden. I work from home so could work from Cheltenham. We have no family in either place so that doesn’t come into it.

I absolutely love living in central London. I think I would really miss it if we left and regularly read posts on mumsnet from people regretting leaving London. I think it would be an amazing place to be a teenager as they would have so much freedom. Our local primary and secondaries are amazing but I believe Cheltenham also has great schools.

So which place would be better to raise teens? What makes where you live brilliant or awful for teens? If you could raise them anywhere, where would you raise them?

We left London for the Wirral 5 years ago my oldest is now nearly 15 and he has the sort of independence here that I doubt I would have allowed in London. He travels all over the Wirral and into Liverpool and yesterday he cycled into Wales. We've got a big house with a large garden (my 10 year old uses it a lot - trampoline, goal posts, basketball net, tents etc) by the beach and good schools nearly. We were able to get a dog. It's been the best move we could ever have made. It helps that we've got some family and friends still in London so we visit often and now my oldest is old enough to take the train there alone. But Wirral is home and my boys love it here.

Cheltenham is a lot more vibrant and diverse than many people realise. What with the racing, literature, science, food, jazz, music festivals there's a lot of choice. And London's just down the road by train. There are really good schools too.

This is correct. These times are accurate.

Have you lived in Cheltenham?

I'm seeing comments recommending renting in Cheltenham. Just to let you know, its very difficult to rent in Cheltenham because its so popular. Places go very quickly and often even before they're advertised, so please keep that in mind? Oh and its a great town for anyone of any age.

We live in a large village on the outskirts of a small university city. It's perfect for us. It's got a great community feel, and living right in the centre of the village means we are super close to the school, shops and pretty much all activities/clubs can be done within the village. The city has a decent amount going on that we can take advantage of, though obviously not as much as London.

I think what matters most is your day to day life. For us that is mostly school/work/clubs and activities and a bit of socialising. Every now and again, eg at half term, we might have seek out something further afield eg. museums in London, but I don't miss them during term time as we would be too busy anyway!

I moved out of London recently with kids. Although we are having a great time by the south coast and making a lot of friends etc, I will be honest, in my heart I miss London.

London is very special - to those who love it! THere is absolutely nowhere where you can travel about so cheaply and easy across such an incredible diversity of spaces/ mini 'village's/ towns etc - so much free culture but the free travel is unique.

I live in big south coast town and am totally shocked at how awful / non existent public transport is outside London. I walk most places even if it takes ages as there is literally no other choice.

however I didn't want to bring my kids up as teenagers in London - that was a choice based on what I saw around me. A LOT of knife crime in our area - stabbings of teens regularly - and that created an atmosphere where teens were not as free as they are where we live now.

So - yes, some things are 'better' outside London but you give/ take - we have lost a huge amount also by leaving. It's not easy to decide!

London is a great place to live if you’re rich. Some things never change.

There’s a lot of drug paraphernalia, stabbings, homelessness, etc in my “nice” and expensive part of London. I look at it and think: this has to feel stressful for my kids. And I think it kind of does. My oldest tells me a lot that they’d rather live in another place (where their friend lives but it’s incredibly rural and we couldn’t work there! Plus honestly I don’t think they’ll feel that way as a teen). If we can’t manage to afford to move to a particular part of London where all the grime feels a bit less, then we’re out.

I think if my kids told me they'd rather live somewhere else because they found where they lived stressful and frightening then I'd move, or at least seriously look into it.