Jive Bishop and The Surfettes: Surfing on

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Welcome to our support thread for anyone struggling with cocaine. Whether you want to quit, cut down or are someone whose life is affected, all welcome.
We offer non judgemental advice, tips, some absurd chat and most importantly lots of support and encouragement.
Come and join and we'll hopefully all help each other to surf the urges!

Eww Lost that has made me cringe big time!! Mr BI has a terrible porn habit, that's all he cares about. I do not get involved...

Wow Dusty, I need a Mr D in my life!

Mr BI is sounding more unappealing by the minute.
I'm a teeny bit envious of Dusty too. Such a thoughtful husband.

Oh and well done Dusty r.e Not going mad.

Me and my BI friend have been very sensible today. We did lunch like grown ups, had civilised drinks down the pub and we're both having an early night.

No coke fuelled sex here tonight!!!

Go Serial, your Mr BI sounds much nicer than mine!

He's lovely, he's my best friend however we both have the same weaknesses. Thank god we're both married to sensible people!

Looks like I'll have another clean weekend under my belt. Had another BI friend message me at 1 this morning inviting me to go on a trip to Columbia. Luckily I was tucked up in bed!

Ah the old 1am text. I've actually forced myself out of bed in the past after getting one of those and had a party in my pyjamas. I'm far too suggestible.
I admire your iron will Serial.

Been out for the day visiting family in London. I was quite keen on the idea of getting some on the way home but Mr. L vetoed the idea. I'd say he swings between being a good and bad influence.

I came home and ate a giant chocolate muffin and ice cream as a displacement activity which seems to have worked.

Hope everyone's having a good non euphoric weekend. x

I must admit I've had cravings today. Am going to have an early night tonight and ignore any messages!

Small line last night in afraid before going to a hideously drunken dinner party.

There is literally one line left in the shoe. Then I have the oppo to never buy anymore.

Well done to all surfers this eve.

The fact that you can stop after 1 is awesome ponz.

Always been Able to. Helped by going out and not taking any with.

1am texts are great if you don't get them til the next morning after a good nights sleep and think thank God for that! 'Party in your pyjamas Lost? They're normally the best! Still surfing here, have had v productive and boring day decluttering the house. 2 glasses of wine later and I feel a bit smashed Luckily no one of bad influence had called otherwise I would be very tempted. Well done Mr Lost for being a good influence and Ponz for stopping at one

I tried a 3 line rule for a while. Turns out I'm not very good at counting to 3.

Ha ha I've realised that too Serial. No matter what I tell myself I can't say No if it's there.
I've tried doing it and not drinking, setting myself a limit of a few lines, only buying a half, telling myself I will go to bed by midnight.. all my rules are forgotten after my first hit.
That line in the shoe would be calling me very loudly!

It's great to wake up clear headed today. I've done loads of washing, hung it out and off to Tesco's. All without feeling full of dread, dog tired and overwhelmingly sad (which is a bonus).

Enjoy your Sunday all.

I've had a productive weekend, being clear headed and rested is so nice.

Like you lost, after that first line all bets are off. I'm so glad that I didn't answer my 1am message yesterday.

I've directed the OP over here

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/3023383-kind-of-relapse-need-a-hand-hold-arse-kick?pg=1&order=

The poor OP on that thread was really suffering. I think we've all been there and got the T shirt. Maybe she'll join us at some point?

Hope everyone's had an uneventful weekend. I enjoyed feeling fairly healthy too Serial

I looked back at this thread today and realised my use has escalated a bit recently; it's slipping back to most weekends, with the odd weekday too I'm so deluded I haven't really noticed myself sliding down the slippery coke slope but determined to put the brakes on.

I've managed last week and the weekend so going for this week clean too. I can cope with small steps.
That's the plan anyway. Night all x

I slipped again this weekend. Started with me getting drunk then inviting someone over and we got high. Utterly ashamed, can't look at me kids :-( had done 5 weeks sober and now it's all a mess and I want to die, everyone is sober up of me, I seem to go for weeks without it then it happens again. I am also recently diagnosed bipolar which is hard and also adds to me picking up. I knew it was going to happen as well and I didn't ask for help. I'm so stupid, I hate myself so much, I just want to be clan and sober for my children. This is so hard, I don't feel I can do it anymore :-(

Hi butterfly are you new to this thread?
I completely understand, sometimes you just get in a mindset and you just know you're going to use even though you know it's a bad idea. It's all too easy to ignore the voice in your head telling you not to, eh?

Please don't be too hard on yourself. Try to look at this weekend as a blip. You've done 5 weeks clean which is amazing. This is just a bump in the road.
You will feel really down because of the drugs leaving your system. I promise you will start feeling stronger and more optimistic as you recover.

You're welcome to seek help or support on here anytime you're tempted. You don't have to do this alone. Keep your chin up

Yes I am new, been lurking for a while! Didn't know where else to turn and I'm so desperate to change.

I am trying to forget it and move on but it's so hard especially as I'm still feeling hungover! I have just signed up for sober for October to keep me motivated to stay clean and sober.

I wish I had asked for help on Saturday instead of just ignoring the feelings but I just couldn't.

Hopefully that will be my last blip of many, even though I feel suicidal I don't want to die, I want tonne here me healthy for my children.

You want to change, that's the most important thing so hold onto that.
You're right, the hangover makes everything feel a hundred times worse.

Sober October is a brilliant idea and something aim for. I admire your determination. Come on here and surf with us, it does help to talk to people that understand and we all love a good moan.

Beating an addiction is so tough, you will have a few slip ups along the way. I'm struggling too even though I want to change it's blooming hard!

I will keep coming back. Thanks for listening, it Is blooming hard, sometimes I think its impossible but then I look at my kids and know I can do it for them x

Hello butterfly, 5 weeks clean is amazing. You've had a blip and tomorrow you will feel much better and get back on it.

Lost, it's interesting how an increase in use just creeps on us.

Here's to a nice, sensible clean week this week!!

I actually had cravings today. It's Dh's birthday and a part of me was hoping he'd come home with something . God knows what's going on in my head sometimes. After the initial disappointment, I'm glad now and didn't push the issue. We had a nice takeaway.

Really want to get to a few weeks clean so my ridiculous cravings are a bit more under control.