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Original poster

Jive Bishop and The Surfettes: Surfing on

971 replies

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 13/06/2017 17:01

Welcome to our support thread for anyone struggling with cocaine. Whether you want to quit, cut down or are someone whose life is affected, all welcome.
We offer non judgemental advice, tips, some absurd chat and most importantly lots of support and encouragement.
Come and join and we'll hopefully all help each other to surf the urges! Smile

OP posts:
serialtester · 08/07/2017 15:48

Feel slightly more human now. Jesus, I never want to feel that shit again.

DustyDuck · 08/07/2017 21:06

Am smugly at home with no access; MrD apologetic for not having any but really I was quite pleased, out of my hands for once

HoochiMama · 08/07/2017 21:12

Glad you're feeling a bit better Serial. Having my first drink since Tuesday but nothing more. Today I have done lots of gardening and painted a fence. DS at sleepover and I was possibly seeing Mr Rehab but he's being flaky as usual and disappeared. I am so bored!!

serialtester · 08/07/2017 21:20

My Mr BI is having another night on it. I have my pyjamas on and am not leaving the house!!

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 08/07/2017 22:01

Glad you're more back to normal now Serial. Good idea putting yourself on house arrest.
Smug tree for you Dusty Star How bored are you Hooch? You could go outside and watch your fence dry? Grin I don't think I've painted a fence in my life- very productive behaviour!

We've been to a very pissy bbq. I did have a couple of lines there Blush I was very up for getting a load more on the way home but dh wasn't. I'm sure I'll be grateful but was really annoyed I couldn't persuade him. Not good. My head's all over the place.

OP posts:
serialtester · 08/07/2017 22:08

I'm so tempted to go out. I won't though. The more I have the more I want it. At least you won't feel totally shit tomorrow lost!!

HoochiMama · 08/07/2017 22:27

You will be so glad you didn't get more when you wake up tomorrow Lost. Like I will be glad that Mr Rehab didn't come over. Numbing the boredom pain with vodka and fags. Been meaning to paint the fence for months, no bloody man around to do it! Serial on no account leave the house tonight, day 2 would be worse Confused

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 08/07/2017 22:47

Serial bed for you madam! So true, the more you have the more you want. I am actually a female version of a Mrs. BI, be thankful none of you lot know me in real life!
Feel down tonight that I sort of ruined the evening by being pissed off about not getting more. You said last night Serial that you hate your coke "me" and that's what I feel like. I don't like the addict in me.

Sorry for the boring rambling. I'm being pathetic and feel like crying- weird for me I don't do crying really.. I'm finding staying off it really tough.

Love the way you lot always listen to all my crap. I'd be even more Lost without this thread. x

OP posts:
HoochiMama · 08/07/2017 22:55

Don't be hard on yourself Lost, once you've had a couple it's understandable to want more. Look at me.. ruined after last weekend and Tuesday but more than happy to go again tonight if I'd had the chance. It's what that stuff does. You'll be fine (and thankful) in the morning. I'm off to bed. Night lovelies xx

serialtester · 09/07/2017 07:56

How are we all this morning. I feel a million times better than yesterday. Lost, it's strange how all know what we should do. Do what we should do and then feel bloody hard done by!

ponzusoup · 09/07/2017 08:34

Morning all. I managed to surf last night and feel ok today. Day 2. Aiming to get to day 7 - a week off would be more than I've managed in ages.

Lost its horrid being the one pushing it and getting nowhere it's somehow a terrible double whammy but in the end your DH has just been looking at your best interests. My DP is such a better person than me and on the odd occasion he has a line ( usually if we go out together which is still rare- ish with little dd2) he doesn't have any more and always says it's barely worth it and just makes him slightly anxious. Sending a hug hope you don't feel too crap today.

Serial well bloody done very hard to avoid an offer of a second night big gold star and losts balls of steel award to you.

Hooch and dusty smug tree for you two too?

Realised I'm really worried about DD1 transitioning to big school in September. Guessing all your DC have done it? She's a sensitive soul with some issues around anxiety, friendships etc and we chose a school that not a lot of her mates are going to. Well, one actually. Because th other alternative was pretty awful and I reckoned she'd run with the pack and get dragged down. But I think I've got six months of her pushing back and being pretty angry with me. She doesn't take change that well. Any advice welcome although I know it's not the focus of this thread. Do see you lot as my mates though!!

serialtester · 09/07/2017 08:46

I think kids handle it better than we think they will Ponz. It's the anticipation of the transition that is worse than the event itself. Well done on surfing last night!

HoochiMama · 09/07/2017 09:25

Ah bliss... I have had 9 hours sleep and only have a slightly fuzzy vodka head. A million times better than last Sunday. Well done Ponz, keep it up. My son has thrived at secondary school, there were lots from his primary that went but he was only in same class/lessons as 2 of them. He has gradually made lots of new friends and doesn't mix with the old ones as much. I struggled more with the change as in making sure he took in the right books/ PE kit everyday but then he is a boy and very unorganised! I'm sure your daughter will be fine Smile

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 09/07/2017 09:31

I agree, the worrying about a big change of school can be the worst part. My mum wanted to send me to a mixed secondary school in the next town instead of the all girls school all my friends were going to. I remember spending most of the summer holidays dreading it.
Hope your dd isn't too anxious. Maybe have her friend over to play a couple of times so they can talk about it together? Or let her choose a new pencil case or something from Smiggle? All little girls seem to be crazy about that place!

Thanks for your kind words and putting up with my little pity party last night. Confused I just can't dabble. It seems to tip me over the edge.
We all did well last night Smile There's hope for us all yet! Brew

OP posts:
Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 10/07/2017 16:56

It's a new week. Hope everyone has their surfboard ready and pointing in the right direction!

OP posts:
ponzusoup · 10/07/2017 17:47

Was just going to ask if there's anybody out there ( cue rave music)

Day three. Feeling good!

Sending snogs to all.

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 10/07/2017 18:06

Loving the rave music!

Sorry, was actually ill for most of yesterday, as opposed to self inflicted ill. Don't snog me, you might catch it Grin
I think I had bbq poisoning..Sad
Feeling much better today although tired from work. They'll be no shenanigans on my surfboard tonight.

Hope you're all doing well x

OP posts:
serialtester · 10/07/2017 21:18

I've locked myself in the boating shed! Am well tired tonight. Have had coke legs since Saturday - why does it make my legs hurt?!

ponzusoup · 10/07/2017 21:28

All that muscle tensing dusty! I used to get that after mdma binges.

Boating she's sounds like a safe place to be.

I'm exhausted. Just waiting for DD1 to bugger off to her own room then I'm going to snuggle up in bed.

ponzusoup · 10/07/2017 21:29

Shed. Not she's. But maybe we are all boating she's tonight?

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 10/07/2017 21:36

Something to do with muscle tensing. I think you're right Ponz. I sometimes get the awful stiff shoulders after.
Unless you're prone to excessive exercise when high? Lunges, touching your toes and so on....Grin

Let's all hide in the boat shed. I was in my pyjamas before any of the dc tonight!

OP posts:
WhatAFuckUp · 11/07/2017 21:16

Was hoping someone from this thread was going to be online... I've read loads from all of your threads and can relate to so much of it (sadly) Sad

Had a blow out on Saturday and wanted more today but didn't.... fuck it's hard though

Original poster
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 11/07/2017 21:36

Hi What welcome to the thread Smile
Well done today, I agree it is hard but your intentions are good! Sheer will power is half the battle. I've had some great advice and support from all the lovely surfers on here.

I'd love to hear your story if you want to share. I'm struggling with occasional use at the moment, especially at weekends where it usually escalates to a binge Blush Things are gradually improving (with some blips). Anyway, welcome aboard!

OP posts:
WhatAFuckUp · 11/07/2017 21:56

Hi Lost. Thanks for replying. My username refers to the fact that I've managed to rack up thousands and thousands in debt because of my stupid addiction. I'm such a fucking idiot. I'm married and your scenario about being the one to want to get more alternates between my dh and me. We have a great marriage and have cut down a LOT but I fear we'llnever kick this once and for all whilst we're together. Fuck.

ponzusoup · 11/07/2017 22:10

Hi what's. You've come to the right place well done on being brace and realising it's a fools game albeit a very tempting one my DP doesn't know about my addiction which if I'm honest probably helps in the long run but the secret shame!

Does your DH want to cut down too?

Stick with us we veer from silly to sad to determined but we all recognise we have a problem.

I'm on day 4 clean after a fortnight of every other day and despite having a few glasses of wine a night I'm feeling much better.

All power to you.