Les Parisiennes des Mamansnet: Do not ask the kock about les préservatifs in the food.

[botemp]

Lovers of Parisian style and fashion with a conscious mindset and lots of chatter in between.

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Favoured Parisian addresses:

Second Hand Shops

Outlets

Favoured London addresses:

Charity Shops, Dress Agencies, and Outlets

Favoured NYC addresses:

Consignment shops, Vintage, and Restaurants

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Previous threads:

Un

Deux

Trois

Quatre

Cinq

Six

Sept

Huit

Neuf

Dix

Onze

Douze

Treize

Quatorze

When was this 'pretty' thread by the way? Where? And how did I miss it?
I need to know.

Hmm, I think the 'everyone hates me because I'm beautiful' narrative existed long before the oppressor narrative that seems to be popular now. To me it fits much more into the 'cool girl' narrative point taken! But the two could at this point in time be feeding into each other ofc

I do find your take on everyone trying to identify out of being classed an oppressor too simplistic (appreciate it's a paraphrasing) as I feel only critics of woke ideology seem to argue it and not the proponents themselves but I agree that it's generally unhelpful to attach the word privilege to lots of things when the word advantage works better I really like the suggestion to use the word advantage and might try to work that in in conversations. But I have to say that obv proponents of "woke ideology" wouldn't subscribe to the idea, it is an analysis from critics. I find it quite apt myself but sure, further analysis needed :)

I loved the patching btw, I'm wondering if it's a middle aged woman's version of the middle aged man's fascination with WW2, ie becoming fascinated with the past and women's work in the past. I'd love to become a better mender.

I just Googled, I think the recent one was this one, the title sounded very journo to me, which was probably the main reason. I think over a year ago there were two parallel threads on S&B about being beautiful and in response one about being ugly, it was horrible the beautiful thread was delusional and the ugly thread was very honest but constantly being invaded by the everyone is beautiful crowd and inciting some Roald Dahl quote despite people constantly saying how inappropriate it was and how all his awful characters were ugly women.

I am no woke-ahontas (thank you Succession) but I find much of woke criticism poor as it just maligns intentions of individuals who are acting on consequences and therefore does little to dismantle what sets it in motion and further feeds polarisation. I don't think woke starting points are controversial, they're shared by those outside of it as basic tenants of fairness and equality and that's the point of entry. It's the methodology and frameworks from which they operate that are flawed/incompatible IMO and that's where I feel criticism should be focused on.

I think I probably agree with your last point Bo - I definitely don't like using "woke" as a denigrating word because IMO it's been hijacked from the Black community and then turned against them.

Ugh, way to be an echo chamber Bani but yes, that's one of my main gripes all this performative 'activism' that happily mangles language with little regard, it just ends up harming the group that's supposed to be helped. Now the meaning of diversity and inclusion have been bastardised and a willing audience that would previously be keen to support good initiatives are now instantly turned off by the mere mention of it.

Anyhow, I think I've done my bit to live up to our next title of being cancelled, you're all welcome

I finally have some pics of my Dries trousers, I had some vouchers that are running out so went bra shopping with little succes, I think I'll just get some overpriced pyjamas instead. (They're still unironed, I tried on the suggested setting and it didn't seem to take well, I think it's supposed to be a little crinkled, it looks weird on the hanger but not when on 🤷)

ermagerd you're great no YOU'RE great etc.

Do the Dries trousers fall into (my beloved) category of Mad Trousers? Subcategory of "decidedly posh ones"? I like them. They feel unusual for you, like you're branching out?

I have a funeral to go to and am stressing (quite unnecessarily) about clothes. I do have black things, and most importantly for November a black coat, but I'm fretting about the rest.

They're fabulous trousers - I think bo has always had a bit of a flamboyant streak - those pink ones for example.

Sorry to hear that bani If it helps - and I've been to a fair number of funerals - I normally go for something smart, sober (not necessarily black) and totally nondescript. I work on the basis that, if anyone can remember what I've worn the following day then I've done it wrong. That's unless either the family have made any special requests or if it's someone I was very close to, in which case I try and choose something they would have liked.

sorry to hear about a funeral, are they a big deal in Sweden, clothing wise? I'd start with shoes, figure out which ones you're wearing and then just dress upwards.

Oh I am great, thank you speaking of, anyone watched The Great last year? I really enjoyed that absurdity but I think it's a bit marmite. It's back for a second season later this month iirc.

Hmm, I probably do have a suppressed flamboyant streak that flares up now and then. But I'm usually not a floral fan so that's a branching out of sorts. I'm probably more exacting and demanding about flamboyant pieces so they don't happen often. The pandemic has definitely dimmed the flamboyant streak, red lipstick still feels kind of wrong, bright magenta on the lips totally fine though

Thanks @missmoon -- I really do like that shoulder bag ...

Thank you for condolences - it’s an older relative who I wasn’t that close to really but it’s still going to hit hard later I think. Went a bit too soon. It’s in a more rural location and out there funerals are oddly a bigger deal, as I noticed first time I went to one there and was just dressed “somber” but not all black, the way we’d do here in town. It was full on black there. As though everyone lives their lives normally and v casually but when someone dies go full on 1950s prissy like. I don’t even have black shoes suitable for November - because knee high docs do not count! Asked mr bani this morning if he owned a black jumper but he was horrified that I’d consider wearing a chunky knit saying it wasn’t somber enough. ;) anyway, I have stuff to go full prissy in with ill-fitting knee length black skirt, white shirt and poor quality black blazer that doesn’t really match the skirt, but I’d feel dreadfully uncomfortable. I was, honest to god, thinking of a tank top! Black trousers, white shirt, black tank top, black long coat. Then I’ve sort of come to my senses and I realise I’d never wear the tank top after.

Bo, yes, I think it’s the floral that looks different for you!

Sorry, I was thinking of the funerals I've been to, some of them very traditional but surprisingly relaxed about dress code. Sometimes you get people (usually women) there who routinely attend the church service in case there are no other mourners (which I find quite touching) and they're pretty fairly dressed down too. But I forgot you're in Sweden so none of that applies. A think a black tank top would be very stylish but I would say that. Hope it goes ok.

Speaking of black, I ended up ordering some turtle necks from M&S and I'm Click-and-Collecting 4 today, not because I want 4 but because my local branch doesn't have any in stock so I can't try on first. Don't worry, I've already vented on another thread so you're spared my curmudgeonly thoughts on the impact of internet shopping.

I'm after one to try with some velvet flares I bought at some point in the late 90s (I think). I wouldn't say they were mad trousers but they definitely have a party-like-it's-1999 vibe and I first tried to revive them about 3 years ago at a work Christmas do but realised as soon as I got there that I'd made the wrong call and spent all evening sitting at a table with my legs out of sight. It feels like time to give them another go but this time I want to wear them with something very austere - kind of Jack Kerouac joins Earth Wind and Fire.

Yeah, it's the same here, outside of cities/towns things go very traditional with weddings, funerals, etc. Even birthday parties are weird...
I think you're just going to need to suck it up and accept some discomfort. Is the white shirt acceptable in such circumstances? I'm just asking as they tend not to be here, they'd be ok under a tank top (but yeah, don't get one of those if you're never wearing it again).

I admire your persistence with trying to make your flares happen again, Flo. I'm sure you'll manage it, here's hoping it doesn't involve hiding under the table again 🤞

Well in our town I'd say the same, Flo, people turn up tidy, a bit dressed up (i.e. not the fleece jumper, but not always a suit), not colourful, but not necessarily all black. But out there it was full on. So I wouldn't want to stand out too much IYSWIM (done that, wore the brown cord skirt).

Very keen to see these velvet flares. Oh to fit into what I wore in the 90s ;)

cross post with Bo. Yes, trad funeral attire is all black, but white shirt ok - depends on how close you are to the deceased. I'm a niece so could wear white shirt I'd say. (could of course get a black blouse, could potentially be useful in the future)

They were a post-baby purchase bani so I'd sized up. What I hadn't grasped was quite how much my life had changed so they rarely left my wardrobe, which I guess is why I'd like to give them another go; well partly that and partly because they're a really lovely thick, matte velvet - from Next and they encapsulate everything that's gone wrong with the high street since then. But that's for another day. When I first retrieved them I remembered them as wide leg, in which case I'd have been happily wearing them for a few years. But nope, they're flared.

God help us, flared velvet. I am SO into this (not for myself, mind). Is it a bit Groove Is In The Heart?

Ha that's one of Mr Flo's favourite videos! They're actually quite sober compared to that, they're grey for one thing. When I've done the M&S pickup I'll post a photo if I dare. That's not a promise.

Bating my breath!

flo has reminded me of a pair of black velvet jodhpurs I bought from Next in the mid-80s... loved them so much they are deceased. And the devore velvet palazzos from the 90s... but those were too chilly to wear in winter.

Only two more sessions of radiotherapy to go (today and tomorrow) and all well! Back soon, but reading along with everyone.

Thinking of you, Xing! Glad to hear you're holding up.

Have been lurking but not posting. Work crisis and personal one colliding over the last few weeks...

Just to say:

Read Suite Française!! It's amazing (can't speak for the English translation as I've not read it all, but I've looked at specific passages after translating them with students: some of the trickier descriptive segments simply vanished - probably doesn't detract from the book as a whole, though). The story of how the manuscript came to be published is remarkable, too.

bo the history of post-WW2 France is understudied and fascinating: there were lots of different Resistance movements and they didn't all get on, by any means. They worked parallel to one another a lot of the time, and after the war old tensions resurfaced. The Occupation was a deeply troubled period, full of grey areas, compromises and betrayals, and one many people were happy to sweep under the carpet.
Ex-H's grandfather was a Résistant and was denounced by a neighbour in his village, who told the Germans where he'd hidden weapons. He was deported to Bergen Belsen and only just made it back. He returned to his village and lived alongside the man who'd denounced him for 15 years without any mention being made of it.

I didn't order the green Jaeger leather jacket when I was in the UK because my head wasn't in the right place, but I'm going back after Christmas, so it's still on my list. Has been for about 2 years, so another month or two won't change much.

I stupidly hennaed my hair during lockdown in a moment of boredom and, after some balayage and other costly stuff, I'm just growing out the colour, so I'm admiring Shrike's photos and hoping mine looks even half as good in a few years when the awful fox/badger phase is over.

Sorry for moi, moi, moi post. Not much fashion/style related to report (although I bought one of these these for my trip to Scotland, and am v pleased with it: perfect balance of lightweight/ warm).

Good wishes for Xing

I hope you find something suitable for the funeral Bani. I am a total wimp for those occasions, I get very emotional.

Loving that Bo is flaunting the florals absolutely love the trousers

And I really want to see those velvet flares Flo! I agree this is the time to go for it.

Here's to a suppressed flamboyant streak! The trousers look great, bo.

Speaking of flamboyant trousers, I kept my party-like-it's-1999 velvet flares, too, flo. Mine are even purple, but so 90's they are extremely low rise. I did party in them at the time and recall the zip breaking in the toilets of some club in Central London and some lovely woman giving me a kilt pin to hold them together. Not sure how I could save them and adjust the waistband, though.

Auld, I've only read "Suite Francaise" in English (sorry, can't do accents on my phone) but the story around the manuscript is as amazing as the book itself, I agree.

Hi, I had a fabulous time in Lisbon, the Ginzas got an excellent outing, it was the perfect temperature for cashmere skirts/dresses and Ginzas.

Belcanto was pretty casual, I think I pitched it right with a Joseph cashmere ankle length skirt here with a slouchy cashmere sweater, (also Joseph), chunky Paco Rabanne gold bracelet and a Chloè Tess crossbody pouch.

And the Ginzas.

I have to say the discount was entirely to do with my husband.

My French is restaurant at best...