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Looking for a non-white dress for (my) wedding

230 replies

Somerville · 08/10/2016 21:33

I'm getting married early next year. It's my second marriage (I'm widowed) and my fiancé's first.

Between my father in his uniform (retired from armed forces), my DD's in huge, meringue-style tulle and sequin bridesmaid dresses, and my gorgeous and very tall fiancé in his morning suit, I don't want to let the side down. Smile But neither do I feel it would be right to wear a traditional white wedding dress again. And certainly no veil.

I spent a few weeks designing a dress with a friend who is a (professional) dressmaker and we came up with a plan for a long, silk bias cut dove-grey dress with a cape back. But my sister has put me off it by saying I'd look like a nun, and my friend has a lot of work on and if I want to commission anything else I'd need to confirm it with her quickly. However she has pencilled in time to do alterations to something off the peg, which feels more sensible at this stage.

So I'm looking for long dresses that are silver or blush pink. I want at least a short sleeve and certainly not strapless.

We're getting married in a church and having our reception in a rather grand library. I'm just turning 40, 5'6 and size 10 but big norks and broad shouldered so sometimes have to size up if it's high necked and tight across the top. I'm short waisted (if I put on weight I'm an apple) but slim hips/long legs. Pouffey skirts don't look as good on me as slim-fitting skirts. Oh and we're TTC so I don't want something super tight across the waist just in case. Smile

I've budgeted up to a thousand pounds but I'd rather spend as little as possible less. If I couldn't get something at that budget I could increase it but I'd rather not.

I've ordered a returned a few things that were too shiny or a weird shape. And I've pounded the pavements at a designer outlet village this afternoon. I tried on a gorgeous fuschia and cream Temperley dress that I loved but it didn't feel bridal somehow.

Any ideas gratefully received.

OP posts:
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Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:16

Closephine - Hmm, that's an idea, thanks. I've been a bit reluctant to go into bridal boutiques but my sister really wants me to. Going in to look at bridesmaid dresses could be the start of a slippery slope... Maybe if I go without her it would be okay.

Those dresses are along the right lines - I fear this will make me sound like a snob but I don't want to get married in polyester.

OP posts:
MrsLettuce · 08/10/2016 22:16

Better?

cookielove · 08/10/2016 22:17

this

MrsLettuce · 08/10/2016 22:20

I don't want to get married in polyester Grin understandable the Temperley is polyester too mind

also polyester

WannaBeDifferent · 08/10/2016 22:21

www.truebride.co.uk/775/M645

Forgotten how to do links Blush

Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:22

I like that Debenhams one but I've looked at the Jenny Packham for Debenhams in store and wasn't impressed by the fabrics or finish for the price tag.

I've also looked at Needle and Thread after seeing it recced on another thread recently. The dresses are nice but they all seem to emphasis waists over any other body part. Good for pears but not really flattering for me, I suspect.

I keep going back to that Raishma one. Wonder if I could pull it off.

OP posts:
Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:28

If my attitude to wearing artificial fabrics made you smile, you should have been there to see my lovely fiancé's response to my suggestion that we do the whole thing more casual and he wears a lounge suit and no tie.
"Getting married in an open necked shirt?!!"
Grin Grin

He tried to say afterwards that he was happy to do so if that's what I wanted, but the spluttering had given him away.

OP posts:
MrsLettuce · 08/10/2016 22:28

Ooh missed the Raishma one, that's stunning. Polyester mind but no less lovely for it. Got to be worth trying on.

MrsLettuce · 08/10/2016 22:29

x post!

GrinGrinWine

Nogravyforyou · 08/10/2016 22:30

www.frocknfabulous.ie/pronovias-conary-gown/dp/2705

Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:34

Meh at all the polyester.

It's not stopping me ordering the Raishma one right now though. Worth a try.

The frocknfabulous is a good shape for me except for being too low cut.

OP posts:
WannaBeDifferent · 08/10/2016 22:36

I love this www.truebride.co.uk/409/M589

Nogravyforyou · 08/10/2016 22:40

https://www.theknot.com/fashion/116940-montage-by-mon-cheri-mother-of-the-bride-dress

By the way, not saying you're mother of the bride, all the dresses I'm picking just keep coming in that category on the website Blush

Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:44

Those are both nice. I don't have time to drive round half a dozen different bridal boutiques though. Will have to find one with as many bridesmaid dresses as possible and just go there.

Fiancé due home any minute so I'm going to suspend the search for now.

Will look through all the links again when I'm next on my own. And it's great to have ordered a dress to try on and to know to go to Ghost, already. Thanks, all! Flowers

OP posts:
Somerville · 08/10/2016 22:46

Nogravy Grin No offence taken!

OP posts:
RosieSW · 08/10/2016 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Somerville · 08/10/2016 23:29

You already helped Rosie. Flowers

As well as agreeing with my sisters opinion on marrying Lovely in a grey dress.
Grin

OP posts:
EnidButton · 09/10/2016 00:56

Having a wedding reception in a library sounds incredible! Shock Congratulations to you both. SmileFlowers

PerspicaciaTick · 09/10/2016 02:00

Would it be worth looking at bridesmaid dresses for you - something like the ones by Vera Wang? I wore a bridesmaid dress to my wedding because I could get it in the colour I wanted.

closephine85 · 09/10/2016 06:46

Don't worry you don't sound like a snob! Found myself on this website and I wonder if a few are along the lines of what you're looking for?

kelseyrose.co.uk/collection/#

Love this one...

kelseyrose.co.uk/product/50057/

And you could add a separate over the top to give you some sleeve (this is where the bridal boutiques could help you!)

Scoose · 09/10/2016 07:45

Ooh good luck please do update on if the raishma one was any good when it arrives!

gettingtherequickly · 09/10/2016 08:09

too dark?