Messages from step child

[Stepchildrenarehardwork]

So for context. SD was suspended from school, my partner allowed her a sleepover last night. We were staying at his house. I wouldn’t have stayed if I had known.
last night 2am I ended up on the sofa as they were so bloody loud. 5am I heard almighty banging and 5.45am she was in the kitchen banging aroud making food and having no respect. Yet we all have to respect that she is in bed until 11am and to be completely silent until she wakes up.
he asked why I was asleep on the sofa so I explained and he Asked did I have proof so I had a time stamped video of the noise.
he had a conversation with her tonight.

she then sent me this-

you can delete that video of me u don’t have consent to take videos of me and my friend one it’s weird two u had no need too and i don’t care if it “woke you up” you should’ve been in ur room not in the living room and dad was fast asleep so was everyone else so i wasn’t being too noisy either u js want to argue for the sake of it and you have ur own bloody house to go to if u think it’s too loud here next time stay there if u don’t like the noise of it so ur not recording me like a weirdo next time i find out ur recording me ill do the exact same thing to you when you’re moving around in ur own house and see if u like that and next time u have a problem with me talk to me not my dad since he doesn’t want to have u talking to me through him

my reply back-

Unfortunately it was very loud last night, the boys struggled to get to sleep and this was also mentions by them to your dad. I was woken up at 2am and I went downstairs as it was quieter. I heard you banging around in the kitchen at 5.45am and I didn’t speak to you at all this morning about it because your friend was there. Your dad questioned why I was sleeping on the sofa so I explained it was too noisy. Unfortunate your dad always likes everything as proof so I yes I do have all the noise being made so he couldn’t accuse me of staying downstairs for a different reason. We are meant to be a family and respect each other. I always respect you are asleep in the mornings and I am as quiet as possible out of respect, and I am also making sure the boys to do, and on the occasion they did make noise and disturb you they were disciplined and had things taken away. Your dad said this morning he would speak to you so I left it at that. Next time you have a sleepover I would just appreciate that you respect everyone else in the house.

her reply was—

the boys was asleep so idk what ur on ab dad said it didn’t wake him up or jessica and the boys was fast asleep and you always like to cause problems and you’re only saying something nice because you’ve said to dad it has to be me or you and you know full well he’s gna choose his kids over a woman who doesn’t want his kids around. talk to me instead of my dad he has a lot to deal with and has work.

Am I right to feel angry?

Why do you keep bringing the law into it ? Surely you were taught morals and responsibilities to others by your parents ? If people didn't in general contribute to society , how would society function ? And prop up.l people.like the OP and myself when needed ?

Absolutely I was taught morals.
Morals differ between people.

I don't know anyone who has a term of contributing to society in order to live.
You say you believe they do hence my earlier comment, 'to you maybe.'

So we all just live in a bubble without contributing to anyone or anything around us, do we ?

Yet miraculously, we are surrounded by health care professionals, social workers and a welfare state , all free of charge to those who need that help , who support us physically, emotionally and financially when needed ? It's a one way street, is it ?

Not to me , it isn't . And you're quite right in saying people's morals differ .

Where did I say people don't contribute to society?

I said there is no legal expectation.

I tend to not expect much from others as they don't owe me anything.

I can see we have different perspectives . It's OK not to agree . Peace and love .

Read more carefully, please. I noted that I am, in fact, also a disabled person. I had a career ending injury and resultant PTSD.
No jealousy here, either, I'm sure both the OP and I would rather not have our respective life-impacting medical things.
Thanks for your concern.

Well, in turn for NOT wanting to contribute to society, if one chooses that path, should be a bare essential life without anything extra. It's not the citizen's job to support someone who wishes to not contribute to society. They did not ask for that person to be in the world, either. I am not talking about the OP, as she does do some things; but I can see how it would anger people to know they are working so hard and so many hours to get half of what OP is given.

As for the fibro and ME, she is not the only one in the world with both conditions. Add in CRPS, osteoarthritis and a few other maladies, and there I am. Would it be nice to be able to float around, hire cleaners, get takeout, etc? Yes, it would. But massages actually hurt my fibro, I am photo sensitive and heat sensitive due to my fibro, so trips and vacations to warm places are not fun. Plus, no one would pay me to do those things.

I think posters have a right to be fussed at the OP and the way she has acted with her NVDP's SD and all of her excuses. The way the OP has described the teen makes her sound like a spoiled brat, but on reflection, is she? Or is she reacting to the chaos the OP brings into her world?

Posters have gotten wound up from this thread, and sometimes I wonder, was that the point?

Exactly. Does he have 4 baths a day when at the sleepovers with your ex too? I really can’t imagine with the chaos you could possibly fit in 4 baths a day! Still doesn’t add up to that huge bill and night lights and charging cost pennies not pounds

Agree

This was a very hard read. Lots of lies and so much to take from the story. I feel most of it is fabricated. It started with OP saying she had to sleep downstairs away from noise. Same OP that can’t walk and relies on a mobility scooter. Also studying beauty. Bathing child 4 times a day. Has sleepovers at his house. Is controlled by a drug and alcoholic man. Has a lesbian friend she’s not allowed to talk to in case they are up to anything. Has lots of money coming in. Records stepdaughter in her own home and can’t see a problem. She is threatening to report him to SS when she is just as bad. No family support but Dad has given her £15000 . So much more to this than meets the eye. I suggest she write this out as a script and sends it to Eastenders, it would keep the producers very busy!

@GentleJadeOPyes my dad doesn’t listen or is t there for me througout relationship issues, due to his job cannot have my kids. But he gave my sisters money and said that it wouldn’t be righ to not do the same for me and my kids. He has nothing to do with my sister who lives 3 hours away but still gave her the same xx

Completely agree. I think we should just leave OP to her fantasy world. She's clearly doing alright out of it.

Completely agree! Feel so sorry for all the children involved in this mess. OP please put your children first and end this relationship

OP genuine question. I'm not judging people who want to do nice things for their kids whether on benefits or not and this is a gift from your Dad. However, why are you putting yourself through a nightmare slog to Florida, which you know will be hot and make your health condition worse? If it's for Disney, there's one across the channel, it might be smaller but it surely makes more sense in your circumstances. I don't understand your priorities (maybe it's because I'm old and in my childhood making it to Disneyland would have been about as achievable as Mars for most Brits)

People can use their disability money for anything they choose. Anything.

@Stepchildrenarehardwork STOP posting your whole life on here! No one needs to know how much money you get, where you get it from, what you do with it! You are putting yourself in a very dangerous position here. Your life is your life. You need to get wise, grow up, and live it sensibly and safely for all your sakes, but especially your children.

@Uricon2we did Paris a few years ago, I did Florida a few times as a child so I personally have done both and Paris just doesn’t compare. Plus alot of their friends have done Florida. And you have the whole universal side which is my son well over. Yes it’ll make it worse; yes I’ll spend some days bed ridden whilst my sister takes them but ultimately I get to give them the experience that their dad’s won’t and i feel it’s my only opportunity as am slowly getting worse. Doctors are on plan with some pain relief that I can have as extra. I have mobility scooter planned, extra leg room and I will par take in what I can. Primarily my sister will do the big rides etc but I can see their faces and be there. Lots of shade and indoor. I have to learn to manage and adapt for my kids

OP I really think you should delete this thread, you're giving away far too much information.

I’ve just reported the thread for this reason. OP is being VERY unwise and unsafe about the information she is sharing.