Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Step-parenting

Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.

Upset about bedrooms.

241 replies

Pools27 · 26/02/2022 12:57

Want to keep it short.

All DC are the same sex.

Me and H have a 1.5 year old and he has two older DC as well who are 11 & 13.

Just moving our DC into their room now (I know I'm a bit late!).

DSC 13 has always been quite sensitive and has been making comments that it's not fair that our DC don't have to share a room. DSC share here and I think they do at their mum's too.

Have explained it would be no good one of them sharing a room with our DC as they are so young, they'd never be able to use the bedroom past toddlers bed time etc... Or have friend round and things.

AIBU to think it totally makes sense that youngest has a room to themselves and older two share as similar in age?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ukborn · 28/02/2022 09:45

My stepkids shared, and my two had their own rooms. Then one of the older boys moved in full time. He had to share when his brother came. It was a big room. They never said anything about it. We even had a guest room so there was an extra room but it never arose.

ILikeYourButt · 28/02/2022 09:56

“Privileged” is about all I have to say about some of these replies.

“I FeEl sOrRy fOr tHe StEpChiLdrEn”.
Oh Fuck off.

Where I live there is currently a major housing crisis. There just simply are not enough rental properties, with over 200 applicants at every viewing. I currently know two homeless families. One is staying in a tiny garden shed with 3 teens. The other alternates between a tent and her car with 4 young kids. Neither are homeless through any fault of their own, their rental properties were sold. The wait list for public housing is 10 years long.

All of them would sell their souls to have a house and their kids sharing a bedroom.

Some of these responses are eye watering.

Lorw · 28/02/2022 10:07

@ILikeYourButt

“Privileged” is about all I have to say about some of these replies.

“I FeEl sOrRy fOr tHe StEpChiLdrEn”.
Oh Fuck off.

Where I live there is currently a major housing crisis. There just simply are not enough rental properties, with over 200 applicants at every viewing. I currently know two homeless families. One is staying in a tiny garden shed with 3 teens. The other alternates between a tent and her car with 4 young kids. Neither are homeless through any fault of their own, their rental properties were sold. The wait list for public housing is 10 years long.

All of them would sell their souls to have a house and their kids sharing a bedroom.

Some of these responses are eye watering.

Oh that’s heartbreaking Sad really puts it into perspective doesn’t it
candlesandpitchforks · 28/02/2022 12:43

@ILikeYourButt

“Privileged” is about all I have to say about some of these replies.

“I FeEl sOrRy fOr tHe StEpChiLdrEn”.
Oh Fuck off.

Where I live there is currently a major housing crisis. There just simply are not enough rental properties, with over 200 applicants at every viewing. I currently know two homeless families. One is staying in a tiny garden shed with 3 teens. The other alternates between a tent and her car with 4 young kids. Neither are homeless through any fault of their own, their rental properties were sold. The wait list for public housing is 10 years long.

All of them would sell their souls to have a house and their kids sharing a bedroom.

Some of these responses are eye watering.

Spot on. It's always the same you mention SC and peoples normal perspectives goes out of window.

The house market is mental atm

BungleandGeorge · 28/02/2022 13:05

Just offer them both the chance to share with the toddler, I’m not sure why you’re so against it if that’s what they want to do. Little children often like sleeping with siblings, and sleep better which will help you

RedWingBoots · 28/02/2022 16:03

@BungleandGeorge I wouldn't offer I would tell the older "madam" to share with the toddler, otherwise she will bully her younger sister into sharing.

5thnonblonde · 28/02/2022 16:07

That’s right @RedWingBoots crush the rebellion at the root. Children should know better than to speak up at home, crush that down before it gets out of hand 🙄

RedWingBoots · 28/02/2022 16:20

@5thnonblonde I refer you to ILikeYourButt's post.

aSofaNearYou · 28/02/2022 19:49

@BungleandGeorge

Just offer them both the chance to share with the toddler, I’m not sure why you’re so against it if that’s what they want to do. Little children often like sleeping with siblings, and sleep better which will help you
If you actually read the OP, neither of them has said they want to share with the toddler. The oldest has said she wants her have her room, presumably assuming that her younger sister can just share with the toddler so she can have what she wants.
BungleandGeorge · 28/02/2022 20:08

@aSofaNearYou if you read her posts she refers to her son and that the children are all the same sex, so where does ‘she’ come from? And she also says that the oldest child complained that her son didn’t have to share a room. Which isn’t what you’ve put either- did you read the posts? Offer eldest the chance to share with toddler is perfectly valid, if they have to share with the same sibling all the time perhaps they just don’t get on.
OP another option is that you split the visits of the step children. You and the Mum have a bedroom sat empty half the time..

aSofaNearYou · 28/02/2022 20:17

[quote BungleandGeorge]@aSofaNearYou if you read her posts she refers to her son and that the children are all the same sex, so where does ‘she’ come from? And she also says that the oldest child complained that her son didn’t have to share a room. Which isn’t what you’ve put either- did you read the posts? Offer eldest the chance to share with toddler is perfectly valid, if they have to share with the same sibling all the time perhaps they just don’t get on.
OP another option is that you split the visits of the step children. You and the Mum have a bedroom sat empty half the time..[/quote]
Well from what I've seen OP has been pretty non committal about whether they are boys and girls, just referring to them as the same sex. Other posters started saying "she" which crept into my subconscious after a while, perhaps I missed a rare comment where OP specified they were boys but it's not really crucial to the thread, is it?

The eldest complaining about the youngest having their own room and them not IS what I've said. They're not saying they want to share with the toddler, which is what you've said. They're moaning about not having their own room. The only way for them to have their own room is for the other older child to share with the toddler, which is not something they've said they want and objectively would not be fair on them.

Louisa4987 · 28/02/2022 20:57

Funny how no one seems to be suggesting the SC's mother isn't adequately providing for them because they share at her house... clearly it's ok for children to share a room just not when they're step childrenHmm

TicTacHoh · 28/02/2022 21:13

@Louisa4987

Funny how no one seems to be suggesting the SC's mother isn't adequately providing for them because they share at her house... clearly it's ok for children to share a room just not when they're step childrenHmm
Indeed. Always an issue when it's dad's new family though.
BungleandGeorge · 28/02/2022 22:15

@aSofaNearYou go back and read the thread.

aSofaNearYou · 28/02/2022 22:36

[quote BungleandGeorge]@aSofaNearYou go back and read the thread.[/quote]
What are you talking about? I have read the whole thread and come to the same conclusions as most other people.

forrestgreen · 28/02/2022 23:07

If they were all your ch you'd tell the girls to share.
If the dad's lived with you full time, you'd tell them to share.

I think you just have to tell them firmly

New posts on this thread. Refresh page