Holidays and stepkids

[Dollyparton3]

just come back from a two week holiday with the step kids that very nearly saw me losing my rag daily with. Teenage DSD was rude to her dad and me on a daily basis, obsessed about social media every 5 seconds when we were there, had a complete meltdown any time we suggested going anywhere out of WIFI range and so we essentially spent two weeks staring at the 4 walls we were staying in.

Luckily the grandparents paid for this holiday out of an inheritance they recieved (I paid for myself even though it really wasn't my cup of tea, I hate doing nothing and come out in a cold sweat at the thought of two weeks sat being bored)

Now the demands from Teenage DSD have started for next year, where, when, how long for. Aafter the way that she spoke to her father and me a few times on this holiday I really don't want to get involved in paying the sort of money she's expecting after the grandparents paid it out this year out if she's going to be a wotsit for the whole holiday.

If it were up to me, I'd want to go somewhere where we perhaps travel, like a driving holiday through france or Italy. She's flatly refused demanding two weeks in some spanish hellhole staring at her phone.

What do other steparents do in this scenario? OH did a bit of a disney dad routine as he was just chuffed to bits with the chance to spend 2 weeks with them, I'm going to be paying for the next holiday as the major breadwinner but at the moment I'd rather not go if it's going to be doing something that I don't want to do.

[Livelovebehappy]

Two holidays; one just your DP and is dc, and another just you and your DP? Not a step parent, but that’s what we did with our teens and worked well.

[SavingSpaces2019]

Sounds to me like you're being used as a cash cow by both parents and step-kids.
Your DP can't even be arsed to discipline or parent his brat.
If i were you i would be putting conditions on the pocket money and taking/paying for their holidays - "this is the behaviour i EXPECT from you, pocket money will be docked for every transgression. Regular bratty behavior will result in not being taken on holiday - unless you're own parents cough up".

None of them have any respect for you OP. Even your DP only pays you lip service.
Stop being their cash cow.

[MichelleC69]

She's already said no to France and Turkey next year

She's 15, and she's not paying, therefore she doesn't get to dictate!

[Sosayi]

If you do go then one thing to do is the following
Unlock her phone put a 3 SIM card in it
Top it up with £20
She will have 12Gig of internet to use
And 3000 texts and minutes
If she uses Wi-fi in the hotel the 12Gig will be more than enough
I don’t think it will work in Turkey
But Spain and most of Europe and the USA is fine
For £20 quid you will have a stress free holiday 😂😂😂

[TwentyEight12]

Why bother? She isn’t bothered. She’s prioritised her social media as the number one priority in her life right now. She’s that age and that emotionally unavailable to anyone other than her peer group. Nothing new, it’s just that we didn’t do it via different means because we didn’t have mobiles and tablets annnnnd iPads annnnnd our own laptops annnnnd...

I would say that next time you arrange another family holiday, give her the option of ‘hey, do you know what, you weren’t into the last holiday so we were thinking, how about we give you the money we were gonna spend on you on holiday and you can stay home and do whatever you wanna do with it yeah?’

Everyone wins.

[JellyBook]

Since this thread is three years old I’m hoping the stepdaughter isn’t still expecting her holidays to be paid for.

[TwentyEight12]

Ha!

Good work... I guess she would be 19 now.

Let’s hope she did go on holidays and enjoy them.

[BasilFaulty]

Zombie thread. That being said, I've read the whole thread and think SM's were treated much much nicer and with more patience 3 years ago than now. Not sure the OP would get as much positive responses now.

[JellyBook]

I agree Basil.