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*klaxon* Sporn advice needed

172 replies

RoseCuntedGlasses · 02/03/2017 09:02

Ugh this is well grim, please bear with me.

I've had a pilar cyst on the back of my head for a few years now, and it minded its own business until last week when I caught it with my hairbrush. What started off as maybe a 1in lump swelled up to maybe 2.5in and hurt like fuck. Went to the doctors on Wednesday and got anti-b's and got told they could remove it but the Doctor that does that only works on Wednesdays and I'd missed her for that week.

I woke up in the night in fucking awful pain. It almost throbs and is so taut, if that makes sense. I can't lie on it or in any way that it almost touches the pillow. It's hot and the glands in the back of my head and neck are up and hurt :(

Just before I started writing this, something popped and now the back of my head it soaked with what I guess is pus The lump is still there though.

So my questions given that I won't get a doctors appointment today:

  1. Do I just keep it clean, keep taking the tablets and get an appointment asap? Could be days though, knowing my surgery.

  2. It fucking hurts and is spewing something out now - would a walk-in centre be able to do anything given that I'm already on antibiotics?

Thanks in advance, your gross friend,

Rose

ps. I know the rules. It's really hard to get a pic of the back of your own head, and it's covered by my hair. If anything further develops I'll ask DH to take a pic tonight.

OP posts:
RoseCuntedGlasses · 06/03/2017 15:50

Ha! I'm just imagining my mom coming in, totally getting in the way, not focussing on the lump and just filming five minutes of the tray of instruments to a background of the increasingly impatient doctor telling her to move :o) she's not known for her photography skills, my mom.

Yay! I hope it's gross. But also Boo! I don't like being gross. I've been washing my hair every day and it just gets matted with mank within minutes.

OP posts:
witwootoodleoo · 06/03/2017 16:02

Hurrah for lump removal but you really do need a camera operator. Perhaps you could suggest that they have someone film it to use for training purposes in treating for giving you a copy? Bet you can't wait to be mank free

witwootoodleoo · 06/03/2017 16:02

Return even

BridgeRiverTower · 06/03/2017 16:07

You could have auctioned that one off to the highest sporner bid!

Hope you have camera crew good support. Good luck!

peaceloveandbiscuits · 06/03/2017 18:55

What time on Wednesday, OP? I'll make sure I'm not doing anything else.

illegitimateMortificadospawn · 06/03/2017 23:33

It sounds a miserable state of affairs if your hair is constantly claggy. Good news about the appointment/cancellation on Wednesday. Hope it all settles down quickly.

MimsyBorogroves · 06/03/2017 23:39

I bet that will make a lovely crunch as it's opened up more.

I'm all shallow-breathing here.

pieceofpurplesky · 06/03/2017 23:42

I so love sporn

IwillrunIwillfly · 06/03/2017 23:48

I cant wait for your appointment now on wed! (Thats not sad is it?...)

Chippednailvarnishing · 07/03/2017 00:07

Could you Facebook live it?

FannyFifer · 07/03/2017 00:12

That lump is impressively huge.
Looking forward to the updates.

MinimumPaymentMaximumBurrito · 07/03/2017 10:19

I think Chippednailvarnishing has a brilliant idea!

Wink
RoseCuntedGlasses · 07/03/2017 10:47

Mimsy! Noooooo tooooo far!

It's at 1pm tomorrow. I haven't looked forward to something so much in ages! Although I've had it years, so maybe I'll miss it when it's gone? It's a lot smaller than it was the other day (when it exploded) so maybe it'll be a damp squib when they attack it?

I've told DH I'll be bringing it home to give it a proper burial in the garden Smile

OP posts:
FancyPuffin · 07/03/2017 10:52

I can't wait till Wednesday now Grin

Chippednailvarnishing · 07/03/2017 15:45

Shall we guess it's weight over-invested?

MinimumPaymentMaximumBurrito · 07/03/2017 15:48

I had one removed a year or so ago - even though it was clearly a cyst, they sent it to the lab for pathology testing.

It was removed while with the sack intact so hopefully it won't come back. Good luck tomorrow!

bummymummy77 · 07/03/2017 16:12

Maybe it's Lord Voldemort!!!

Muchtoomuchtodo · 07/03/2017 16:19

How have I missed this? You'll be the talk of the surgery tomorrow!

RoseCuntedGlasses · 07/03/2017 16:42

Ha! Lord Voldemort! What if it's my secret twin that I absorbed?! I'm sure I read about (or invented) someone having a tumour removed and it turned out to be a mummified twin. What the fuck have I been reading?

I feel the need to manage all of your expectations by saying it's a lot smaller than it was last week. It's probably about an inch across now. And it's squishable, not hard, although if I press it, crap comes out. Just goes to show how much pus Envy was in it when it was badly infected and how angry it was Smile

I had a letter come today and it's not at my normal doctors, it's at some private place. They're going to look at me weird when I ask to take pics, aren't they?

OP posts:
picklemepopcorn · 07/03/2017 19:05

That absorbed twin thing can happen! You'll be so relieved tomorrow. I wonder how to train as a sporn surgeon?

PossumInAPearTree · 07/03/2017 19:12

Place marking for tomorrow.

VivienneWestwoodsKnickers · 07/03/2017 19:18

Good luck OP, I hope you get some results immediately!

PenelopeParmesan · 07/03/2017 19:23

Oooh good luck.

Not placemarking

wishcarry · 07/03/2017 19:24

Oh please do get your mum to film it.I love this sort of thing.
good luck for tomorrow.maybe take a couple paracetamol half hour before you go in.

TalkingSheds · 07/03/2017 19:30

Lovely thread Smile

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