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Original poster

New Year No Cry Sleep Solution Thread

183 replies

BertieBotts · 31/12/2009 00:34

Does anyone want to join me in going through the whole book of the No Cry Sleep Solution and doing it properly, like a New Year's resolution type thing? (I am happy to start a week or few into the new year if people need time to sort things out first, get a copy of the book, etc)

I ask because the first time I read the book, I was quite sleep deprived and frustrated and looking for quick solutions, and didn't really realise that it's not so much a book of suggestions as a process to go through which helps change your thoughts as much as your behaviour surrounding sleep. I did the sleep logs, and then DS was ill, and then it was Christmas and we went away for a week, and I just felt it was pointless starting anything new after all that so I probably need to do the sleep logs again before I start so that I have a better comparison. But as a bonus I already have the different suggestions from chapter 4 summarised with page numbers which should be helpful.

Does anyone want to join me?

OP posts:
motherlovebone · 31/12/2009 00:47

i will try anything would be glad to tag along, got to source the book first so may interrupt later...

MoonMagic · 31/12/2009 00:56

Count me in

But I haven't got the book yet, and may possibly be too frazzled to acquire a copy

Any tips on what to do would be great...

MoonMagic · 31/12/2009 00:57

Read your first post again - sleep logs. How long do you have to record them for?

Kalikaroo · 31/12/2009 09:53

Count me in! I got the book as an xmas prezzie!

Haven't finished reading it yet - too knackered!

Original poster
BertieBotts · 31/12/2009 11:01

Oh excellent I could not read it at first either - I suggest just reading the chapters on safety (though it's common sense mostly) and sleep theory for now.

Sleep logs - she suggests recording them for one 24h period (you record nap times & method of getting to sleep, the last few hours before bedtime to see how active/bright/noisy they are, and night wakings) but I did them over 3 days so that I could get an average. I was thinking we could share the night waking and possibly nap logs but keep the evening hours one private if you want since you have to be honest with yourself

Can you check online if they have it or order books online at your local library? You are supposed to do it for about a month to see the effects but you only need the book for the first bit. It's probably a lot easier if you can get a copy since it's a 4-step process, you read up about sleep, then do sleep logs, then read through suggestions of how to improve things, and choose a few you think might help, try them for 10 days and do another sleep log, then either change what you are doing slightly or carry on depending on whether it has helped or not, another 10 days, repeat until it's been a month since you have started and/or the sleep problems have improved to your satisfaction.

It's on offer at Amazon at the moment but still about £6 so if things are tight after Christmas, try the library. Ours will buy books in if you request them, for £1!

OP posts:
Confusedfirsttimemum · 31/12/2009 11:43

Count me in! I'm on the 'misguided' thread for babies over six months too. Had a similar experience to you pre Christmas and really want to get going. Are we starting our sleep logs tomorrow?

shantishanti · 31/12/2009 12:06

Can I join too? I might not manage to post all the time, but I'll join in as much as I can.

I've just ordered the book from Amazon - not heard of it before but it looks like just what I've been after...can't function on this many night wakings, but can't bear to let her cry.

mistletoeandjuan · 31/12/2009 15:02

Brilliant idea. I've had the book (and even found time to read it!) for about a month but have been too tires to make many inroads.

Plus DD has had a cold and has been even worse than normal for the last week so I'm happy to start in a week or so.

tackyChristmastreedelivery · 31/12/2009 15:09

I'd love to join, but haven't the book. I might be able to tag along though, dd2 is 11 months so maybe I could shadow someone with a dc similar age?

Will commence sleep log [shouldn't take long ]

IsloJo · 31/12/2009 17:40

Hi, count me in too! I have already started it though - did my sleep log on Tuesday night (28 December) and last night was the first night of the solutions.

Original poster
BertieBotts · 01/01/2010 02:11

If people have already started I don't think it matters whether we all do sleep logs at once - it's more of a moral support thing I think But if people want to start on a particular date I will join in on that day too. I am going very gently on this as recently split from DS' father and the health visitor recommended I give him 3 months to sort himself out at night before I try anything, but I'm pretty sure she meant trying something like CC, and the main issue I'm dealing with (him fighting sleep and invariably still being up at 10 or later) has been going on since before the move anyway.

How is it going IsloJo? Which solutions have you decided to try?

What problems is everyone having and how old are your babies? (DS is about 15 months, not sure if I said before)

OP posts:
LeoniedElf · 01/01/2010 06:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Confusedfirsttimemum · 01/01/2010 09:35

DD is 8 1/2 months. I'm going to do my sleep log on Monday (think it's a bit unfair to do it over the next three days as it's still a bit 'holiday'). Also, DD has a cough, so is up even more than usual (4 times last night).

I have a pile of logs from before Christmas I can talk about if others are starting earlier.

Good luck everyone!

IsloJo · 01/01/2010 09:36

Happy New Year everyone! Bertie Botts - I'll post my sleep log from Tuesday night later on today. How are you coping? Night 1 with 5 1/2 month old DS was catastrophic - he settles fine at 7pm but woke every 45 minutes and took half an hour to settle each time. After night 2 (much better mind you, but that was because OH gave him a formula feed) and I'm pretty knackered. It was just so much easier and quicker to feed DS back to sleep and the solutions take time. Time that cuold be spent SLEEPING! But I've just got to keep the faith. I think the issue is twofold with him. First, he is taking in an inordinate amount of calories during the night and secondly he has come to rely on having a nipple (or dummy) in his mouth to fall asleep. An hour or two later he's awake and won't settle until I put him on the breast. He spent a fair bit of time in our bed because it seemed easier that way but now I'm ready for a decent night's sleep so he's in his cot. My battle is to try and get him to fall asleep in the cot and not rely on me to feed him to sleep. So it's the "Pantley Pull Out" and the technique of trying to get DS to fall asleep in his cot. He's already on a gentle routine during the day and sleeps for 2 1/2 hours (could be better).

loopyloo82 · 01/01/2010 11:10

Happy New Year everyone - and may I join you?

I already have a read but unused copy of NCSS- perhaps it might get used now??!! DD is 5 months, but where to start with her sleep I don't know! She sounds pretty similar to your DS IsloJo, only minus the daytime routine.

She co-sleeps and from about 1am (or earlie) often wakes hourly, up for the day at about 6 - and that's a good night! She will not sleep without me and so i either go to bed with her or she sleeps on me downstairs until I go to bed. If she falls asleep on her own or is put down asleep she squirms and wakes within 30 mins, often much less. usually the first option as I'm so tired. I feel like you IsloJo, in that the easiest thing when she wakes is just to feed her back to sleep - she is easy to settle if I just do that, but screams if she wakes and doesn't quickly get the breast.

Daytime naps never last more than 40 minutes and it's a struggle to get her to have 3 of these. Once she's awake, she's wide awake (have tried shhh..pat when she stirs).

Basically, she's a disaster. I know she's still young but I'd like to get her sleeping in her co-sleeper cot without me in the evenings and even if she still woke 3 times a night that would be a dream for me.

hope to join you all on this journey

mistletoeandjuan · 01/01/2010 11:35

DD is nearly 8 months and the main problem is the number of nighttime wakings. She falls asleep nicely at 7 (with her dummy and a cuddle) and then usually sleeps ok for the first few hours but after that she can be up every hour needing her dummy or another cuddle.

She's always been extremely fussy with her milk and now she is completely formula fed I struggle to get more than 10oz down her in the day so I never know if she wakes up because she's hungry (but she rarely takes a bottle in the night). She is on 3 meals a day (BLW) and eats fantastically but I still don't think she's having enough milk. I'm on the verge of giving her ready brek at 1am!

Original poster
BertieBotts · 01/01/2010 11:37

I did the pantley pull off when I first read the book and I had a lot of success with it - the only thing was it meant that DS liked to feed, roll over and fall asleep, so if I had him in my arms he would no longer feed to sleep in my arms as he had nowhere to roll away to. Aside from that though it was excellent (we use a co-sleeper cot too) and he seems to prefer his own space now so it should be easy when I do want to transfer him to a cot/bed.

I might do sleep logs again Monday too.

OP posts:
mistletoeandjuan · 01/01/2010 12:53

I'll do sleep logs on Monday too then assuming DD's cold is a bit better then.

I've had a few half hearted attempts at the Pantley pull off with the dummy but it's just so easy to pop it back in when she wakes up in the night. I need to be stricter with myself!

crevee · 01/01/2010 13:27

Hello everyone, can i join in too? I bought the book and read it when DS was 5 months old....he's now just had his 1st birthday yesterday (!) and now only sleeps for any decent length of time when in bed with me, not good for marriage or social life but amazing what you do when you're desperate for sleep. Otherwise he is just like your DD mistletoeandjuan waking every hour for a cuddle.

Everyone i know, even my mum now , are saying i need to do CC but i seriously can't do it. So your support for a more gentle approach is much needed. Off to her website to print off logs now and will start tomorrow.

As of yesterday he's in his cot for naps and the early evening but bed with me for the night until i get a bit stronger willed / have some sucess!!

shantishanti · 02/01/2010 10:59

DD is 7 mo. She goes to bed about 8pm after falling asleep on me, and usually sleeps 3-4 hours before waking, crying for a feed (she is bf). She goes to sleep on me, goes back in her cot, then wakes after another 2-3 hours. Then the same again. I usually bring her into bed with me when she wakes between 6-7, and often manage to get another hour or so of sleep before she finally decides enough is enough and shouts me awake

So its not about amount of sleep, but the brokenness of it...and the fact that she drinks a LOT of milk during the night.

I've not seriously tried anything yet, but have tried to not feed her a few times and cuddle her back to sleep - she screams and screams.

She has slept better in the past - about a month ago she was sleeping 8.30 - 3am which was BRILLIANT . But then she had a horrible tummy bug and has been waking more often since then. I think at first she needed the extra calories to regain the weight she had lost but now its got to be a habit.

jo6891 · 02/01/2010 17:00

count me in...my dd is 1 this week and is still in my bed waking every hour and not napping!! iv been reading the book for months but think m ready to start trying it out!!

cathbath76 · 02/01/2010 20:46

Hi, can I join too? DD is 10 months and still in our bed waking through the night. I feed her 2-3 times a night (she is bf), and give her a dummy in between feeds... But recently, she seems to be waking every time the dummy falls out of her mouth... so I am just constantly reaching over to put the dummy back in. Sometimes she is awake for hours and seems not remotely interested in sleeping.

I read the book months ago but haven't managed to absorb it... need to give it another try!

mamasunshine · 02/01/2010 21:41

Hi all, count me in too! DS2 is 6 months old and won't go to sleep without me, he wakes every 2.5-3 hours through the night and we end up co-sleeping and feeding to sleep. Although the last 2 nights he's woken hourly, but has a cold so will wait until that has passed to do the sleep log. He doesn't sleep well during the day either unless he's in pram or sleeping on me. I have DS1 21 months old so it's not very practical!! I'm finding he's usually very tired and when he is asleep wakes at any slight noise. Haven't read the book yet but will go and order now...

IsloJo · 03/01/2010 12:17

Okay all, here goes. Here is the sleep log for 5.5 month old BF DS last Tuesday (29 Dec). Until last week we were co-sleeping all night long but the night waking was starting to affect us all badly. I was AMAZED that he slept for nearly five hours straight, for the first time in about three months. The following night he was up every 45 mins - hour.

6.50pm ASLEEP in cot
8.30pm Awake sniff/snort awake 15 mins, nursed back to sleep in cot
9.30pm Awake sniff/grizzle awake 25 mins, nursed back to sleep in cot
2.47am (!!!) Awake crying awake 10 mins, nursed back to sleep in cot
3.06am Awake crying awake 10 mins, nursed back to sleep
4.30am Awake crying awake 25 mins, nursed back to sleep in our bed
5.30am Awake 15 mins, nursed back to sleep
6.10am Awake sniffing/snorting 30 mins nursed back to sleep
7.30am Awake kicking

I'm trying PPO and cuddling him in his cot until he falls asleep (Phase 1). First night was horrendous, last night better although I stupidly got it into my head that he HAD to go back to sleep without a breast in his mouth. He was not happy about it and was crying in my arms for about half an hour. I should have soothed him by nursing him much sooner so today I'm feeling really guilty. I just re-read the book and EP does say it's not a do or die solution. I'll remember to stay patient - being gentle and loving is more important than speed!
I'm also trying to get him to sleep for more than one sleep cycle (40 mins) during his daytime naps so am lying down with him and feeding him back to sleep during the day. Once the night sleep is better I'll try PPO with day naps too. Can't tackle both at the same time.
Is anyone trying PPO at night AND during the day?
The strange thing is that I want to keep one night feed (at about 3.30am) for a while longer AND I want to bring him to bed with us afterwards so we wake up together. Am I sick? I think I will miss that quiet night cuddle with DS. Can I have my cake and eat it?

moaningminniewhingesagain · 03/01/2010 12:31

Count me in too, have got a copy of the book somewhere from when DD was tiny.

DS is 12mo and wakes every 1-2 hours every night, usually has one spell of awake for at least an hour as well. I am very tired and fed up now and going back to work tomorrow, gulp.

I also hope to improve sleep while not stopping night feeds altogether, but not sure how.