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Original poster

The lady whose waters broke at 18 weeks ...

210 replies

Theyvallgone · 27/12/2014 20:22

She delivered her baby at 28 weeks-ish ... I can't find her thread to see how her and baby are doing :( I posted on it, but can't see it in 'im on' and when I do a search it looks like it might have been deleted?

Can't stop thinking about this lady bless her! Can anyone help?

OP posts:

lavendersun · 01/01/2015 12:45

Theyvall, having been through this myself I thought it was plausible, hence my post (or two, I can't remember). I don't even know what hypoplasia is to be honest so unless it was something that was explained to me in layman terms instead I am not sure I came across it.

Thing is that I don't often post about really personal things so posting my story on here was a big deal for me and I only did it because I thought a positive story would have helped me during what were very dark days.

Certainly makes me less inclined to share although I still doubt that I will ever notice a troll.

Methe · 01/01/2015 13:14

It is certainly possible to stay pregnant for a long time post pprom and have a good outcome at the end of it. I know people who have ppromed at 16 weeks and have surviving children

My own 22wk pprom was born after an abruption at 27+5, a good weight, a nice colour and with apgar scores of 8,9 and 9. Prior to his birth we were told he was almost certain to die as my AFI had been 0 since the initial pprom and his lungs couldn't develop (pulmonary hypoplasia). When he was born he didn't even require ventilation (7 weeks of cpap and a couple more with supplementary oxygen). He was 6 yesterday.

HCPs are the worst people to speak to about it Ime. They see far more bad outcomes that good and are trained to be naturally pessimistic. Also I found that during my 3rd pprom pregnancy I knew more about the situation than they did - much to their displeasure.

I just thought I'd post again as all the too good to be true posts are a little unfair and will be horrible to read for anyone going though it.

Survival with early pproms isn't common, sadly most very early pprom babies will die but it is certainly possible. It's down to luck.

Premature babies are always vulnerable but they are quite often born looking remarkably robust and healthy too. I don't think it's possible to tell anything from a photo.

Methe · 01/01/2015 13:33

I've re-read that and realise it might be a bit upsetting. I'm sorry if it is :(

When I said my 3 pproms - 2 survived and 1 didn't. We didn't do anything differently. It really is just luck.

I just wanted to out out there that nobblys story, while unlikely, was possible.

Happynewyear2015 · 01/01/2015 13:52

I think it's awful that someone can carry that story on for so long and doing it for attention!

Slightly off topic but is nobblys banned now then? Otherwise she could just name change and be writing on this thread! Or any other thread....

Original poster

Theyvallgone · 01/01/2015 20:12

HCPs are the worst people to speak to about it Ime. They see far more bad outcomes that good and are trained to be naturally pessimistic.

Methe I do understand what you are trying to say here, but I need to disagree with this. It actually doesn't make any sense, HCPs see ALL outcomes - because naturally having had a pprom you give birth in hospital, with HCPs, whether a good outcome or not. Its not as though those with good outcome don't see a HCP for it is it?

Wouldn't want anyone to not trust the person looking after them, that truly would be scary/awful :(

OP posts:

Methe · 01/01/2015 21:46

I did say IME and everyone is different. It makes perfect sense to me. Very few of the HCPs I dealt with had an iota of hope for my sons prognoses. One vile midwife, who should have been in a differently job entirely, asked while administering my second steroid shot " you do know this babies likely to die, don't you?". Bitch.

I'd rather be looked after by a person who could at the very least be pragmatic as opposed to the absolute negativity we experienced.

As I said, I've been though this 3 times. I am entitled to my own opinions without being told they "don't make sense"

jnl0612 · 02/01/2015 00:10

Wow I'm I never thought troll for 1 second. Has this definitely been confirmed ???

HerRoyalNotness · 02/01/2015 00:27

methe we too had awful negTivity with our DD. Her original Dr would say to us she is doing as well as expect ex for her gestation, which was reassuring. She was in a "normal" condition. He went on a rotation after 3 days and we got Dr doom and gloom as a replacement. She had nothing good to say. All day the nurses would tell us her blood gases were good and she just had to grow. We kept hearing conflicting results and didn't know what to think. If felt like they just wanted rid of her. Dr said she was the sickest baby in the unit of 150 beds. The day she died, she had a collapsed lung which managed to reinflate. Her Dr still had nothing but bAd news for us and we were wavering on the decision to stop her care. We ended up doing that and her Dr said she would only last a couple of minutes as she was so small and poorly. Our poor DD lasted 40mins breathing on her own. She was so strong and her dr was wrong. I beat myself up that if we had her original Dr still on the cAse we would have had support and felt more confident to give her more time

It's a decision that will haunt me for the rest of my life.

MNHQ

KateSMumsnet · 02/01/2015 11:23

Hullo folks,

We really don't like to give to much away, but on this occasion things at our end pointed towards to OP being less than genuine, and given the subject matter, we thought it best to remove the thread.

for everyone who has shared their stories on this thread.

Methe · 02/01/2015 12:32

Oh Royal It's terrible isn't it :( I'm sorry about your Daughter. It's clear from the way you talk about her that you loved her very much and I'm sure every decision you made was born of that.

There really is no place in medicine for people who lack hope, or kindness.

daholster · 05/01/2015 23:01

Royal I couldn't possibly try to find the words to comfort you, I am so sad that your loss happened that way, as a mum and as a HCP. You did the best you could for her and I hope you can find peace with that. I want to give you a huge hug xxxx

HerRoyalNotness · 06/01/2015 00:53

Thank you both

I'm back to work tomorrow after being off for 4mths. I'm dreading it tbh. Will just think of how it benefits the family and try to get on with it as best I can.

daholster · 06/01/2015 04:20

Good luck, I will be thinking of you.

daholster · 07/01/2015 08:20

Hope it went well yesterday royal x

hhhhhhh · 08/01/2015 01:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SunflowerSmile · 08/01/2015 03:13

I'm so sorry this happened to you Royal

Hope your first day back went ok. Go easy on yourself.

HerRoyalNotness · 08/01/2015 03:43

It went ok. I held it together until home time when i bumped into someone with a 7mth bump, cried at that, as that's where I should be with my DD.

I've managed to ask for all Fridays off and they're being very good, saying just do what you want for as long as you need. Also giving me easy, small projects that don't have deadlines so as not to get stressed out.

I do need to be in a team though and they don't have a lot of work so will start looking for something else with more busy-ness, hopefully at my old company.

daholster · 08/01/2015 23:11

Wow well done. I hope it gets easier for you, and you get to enjoy some family time this weekend.

Babyh200 · 16/01/2015 22:25

I feel really gullible and posted often on the thread trying to support the OP.
I kept checking back for updates, especially since I believed she was in a hospital local to me. Anyway, It turns out one of my close friends colleagues had a premie baby and was in the NICU for 11 weeks (or thereabouts) and I was so worried about nobbly when she stopped posting that I asked my friend if she could find out anything about how they were doing. My friend came back to me and said her colleague definitely didn't recall them at all and I thought that was a bit strange. (I'm also good friends with one of the midwives because of my own loss and was going to message her too) Now I've found this update tonight it make sense why!

HerRoyalnotness, Im so very sorry to hear about your daughter. I'm sure the blanket you sent has gone to a good home. Thinking of you so much, please don't blame yourself for any decision you made you just wanted the best for your baby girl.

DixieNormas · 17/01/2015 00:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Babyh200 · 17/01/2015 09:37

Dixie: this has made me weary of posting on future threads. How anyone would do such an awful thing for attention is beyond me. It's just shameful it isn't it!

DixieNormas · 17/01/2015 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StillinShockAhhhhhhh · 29/07/2015 23:03

Does anybody remember what she said the baby was called? Woman on one born this evening has remarkably similar situation? Same age same hospital same gestation when waters broke really sad outcome :( which could explain why thread was pulled

DixieNormas · 29/07/2015 23:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StillinShockAhhhhhhh · 29/07/2015 23:06

The poor couple on one born do literally fit the thread perfectly.....

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