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My boyfriend likes to be fuc*ked up the bum!

289 replies

liliboard · 19/10/2019 23:49

So this is a long one.

And note, I'm deadly serious.

So me and my partner have been together for 11 years. His sex drive is waaaaay higher than mine. Which is cool. But my partner loves anal. And I don't mean my bum! He likes me to fuck him in the bum with, well, anything. Dildo, carrot, orange, my fist.
This all started within a year of our relationship. He admitted he liked some bum stuff and it's just evolved. At first I didn't mind and was interested in the new and exciting sex stuff we were doing. But as time has gone on I have hated it more and more. Dreaded it every time. It's like a chore. I really hate it. When he talks about wanting to 'suck my dick after I've fucked his arse' and 'i want your spunk up me' whilst we're in the moment just puts me off him completely. We've had countless arguments over it and I've just ended up basically saying 'i don't like it but I'll do it because you do'. But it's honestly making me find him less sexually attractive. And I feel it's completely ruining how I feel about him. We've talked loads about it and we even stopped doing it for a while which made me happy but him sad!! He says it's his way of release and takes away stress. And I get that. But no matter how hard I try, I cannot get away from feeling distant from him. I don't believe he is gay. We've got 2 kids together and are engaged (although yes , I know it can still happen) but I think he's maybe a little bit gay? Bi? I dunno.
Anyway. Any advice would be really appreciated and if anyone likes this stuff too , please, let me know!!!

OP posts:
Sadiesnakes · 20/10/2019 00:05

Op request this moved to sex.

Crazyladee · 20/10/2019 00:06

Omg what the hell??

SlightlyStaleCocoPops · 20/10/2019 00:06

🍿

FreeBedForFlys · 20/10/2019 00:06

On the offchance this is real - yeah. He’s as gay as a yellow duster.

liliboard · 20/10/2019 00:06

We have been on a bit of a rocky road for the last few years and this is one of the reasons. So yes, we were breaking up. But we worked it out and things were good but it's all come back to this sex stuff again.
Call me a coward but I guess leaving someone u e been with for such a long time with 2 kids and a mortgage is a really scary thing to do! I'm not saying I'm staying with him for the sake of whatever, it may we'll end one day but right now I'm trying to see what people's opinions are of the matter. I've had absolutely no one to talk to about this. When I Google it, it seems like it isn't that weird if you're into odd sex stuff (at least he doesn't want to wee in my mouth!!) I didn't know if this is a gay sign I should look out for or if it's just a weird sex thing .

OP posts:
betternamepending · 20/10/2019 00:07

Well he's not fantasizing about you is he...

averylongtimeago · 20/10/2019 00:07

Really?

WomensRightsAreContraversial · 20/10/2019 00:07

An orange?! posting for deletion msg

NC4Now · 20/10/2019 00:08

Well whatever he’s up for... are you up for it? The question is all about what you want and feel,surely?

Flibbitygibbit · 20/10/2019 00:08

Best thing about Christmas is a chocolate orange.

Anyhow, cool story bro 👍🏻

betternamepending · 20/10/2019 00:09

I wouldn't mind the anal stimulation but the fact that you have to and he is clearly fantasizing about men, means that he is using you.

QueefLatifah · 20/10/2019 00:09

Op. He is not even hiding the fact that he is pretending you are a bloke.. you need to wise up.
He’s going the wrong way about getting his 5 a day.

Sadiesnakes · 20/10/2019 00:09

Well he's not fantasizing about you is he...

This..

liliboard · 20/10/2019 00:09

And what does posting for deletion message mean?!!?

OP posts:
MrsBobBlackadder · 20/10/2019 00:10

He’s going the wrong way about getting his 5 a day

@QueefLatifah That is the best thing I've read all day Grin

chocolatespiders · 20/10/2019 00:11

Does he penetrate you as well? Or is it all one sided?

ICouldntHelpButWonder · 20/10/2019 00:11

Sorry OP but yes defo gay☹️

Queenest · 20/10/2019 00:12

Sounds unlikely but then I’m often surprised by what reportedly goes on.

DareDevil223 · 20/10/2019 00:12

How very different from the home life of our own dear queen......

Lex234 · 20/10/2019 00:12

OP even if we are going to write off the fixation on anal sex, did you not find the comments about wanting to "suck a dick" and "have spunk in him" a clue?

He is holding up a big flashing rainbow sign with glitter cocks on!

He might not feel ready to come out even to himself. But he is at the very least bisexual, if not gay.

Do not take part in any sex act you do not want to, or feel comfortable with. Your needs are important too.

Pannalash · 20/10/2019 00:12

@Candle1000 Grin

yikesanotherbooboo · 20/10/2019 00:13

OP I'm sorry you are feeling unsupported. You are in a horrid situation..Sex should be a mutual pleasure and your partner and you are not compatible. Even worse; he expects you to perform acts that are not enjoyable to you for his pleasure.where is it all going? I fully understand the urge to keep going for the sake of your family but is that the best long term solution? It sounds very unsatisfactory for you.

Aveisenim · 20/10/2019 00:13

Sounds like he's at the very least bi, however (with my serious head-on) guys are known to have a G spot there which is probably why he finds it so enjoyable. That being said you AREN'T enjoying it which matters too. For you is there any compromise to be had? Different kinds of relationships work for different people and if you're otherwise happy (is it just the sex thing or are there other issues?) the it may be worth discussing options you're both happy with

Aveisenim · 20/10/2019 00:14

'Scuse the typos!

InsertFunnyUsername · 20/10/2019 00:14

Ooooo I say

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