FAB & GLAM 10 - Gosh, Do We Really Talk That Much???

[Dumbledior]

Hi, new thread

Lovely to see all the old posters again. Don't go now you are back.

Annie/UC/MHIS - lovely to see you and thanks MHIS for the FB chat.

lovely to chat to you too x Keep your chin up!

Chins you mean!

Hi everyone

Glad you did a new thread.

Hope everyone is enjoying the school hols - weather is horrid here today so we are making a mess at home. Will have to drag mine out soon though as it is driving me crazy.

Dior hope you are feeling a bit better - you know where i am if you need me.

HW - we need to do that meet up. I am free some days next week and the week after. Can you do any?

mon wed and thursdays are my free days - i dont think i have anything booked for those days but i do have children to look after - how about a trip to the castle or zoo?

Sorry mean mondays tuesdays and thursdays.

Next week I can do any day so far, except Wednesday. Zoo sounds good. I did mean WITH kids anyway as I have ds too. Let me know what day is best for you and I will book you in .

Crikey - 10 threads
Hi MHIS - glad to see you back and I'm so pleased to see you getting your life back. I do keep an eye on you on FB and I must say you are looking FABULOUS!!!
Hope you are feeling a bit better now Dior. How is it going with H? Did you ever have 'the talk' with him?
HW I take my hat off to you having 4 dc. My 2 are driving me to distraction this holidays. Its not their fault but they do get so bored and stir crazy when the weather is crap and we can't go out. I'm crossing my fingers for a sunny August!
I'm feeling a lot more positive this week. I was even starting to annoy myself last week, I was in the foulest mood ever but we had a really good weekend and I decided to count my blessings and stop being such a misery!
I do think I'm having a mid life crisis though and several of my friends who are approaching 40 are having the same "is this it" feeling about their lives.
Anyway, hope everyone else is OK and managing to cope with the soggy summer holidays.

Blimey - didn't I update about The Talk? I will later as ds is sitting next to me at the mo.

Thanks Ginny :-) Glad to see you are feeling better too x

Will be on MSN later so might catch you there for a proper catch up session :-)

MHIS - hello I remember your orginal thread. You've been through so much yet still manage to sound so chirpy. Glad to hear you are bearing up. I will email you when I get a chance. DD was in the NICU for a few days but then got moved to SCBU. She is doing well and has put on weight. She lost a whole pound which upset me a lot but is almost back to her birth weight now. She is over 1.5kg so can come out of the incubator now and we can have fun dressing her How long did it take you to establish bf with your dd? My dd is starting to suckle but is so tired most of the time that she doesn't stick with it. She was born at 30+5 and would have been 33 weeks tomorrow.

HW I changed my setting so you can CAT me.

OK, so, we ahd the talk last Sunday. He asked why I was being pathetic and not talking much to him. I told him the reasons and that I don't want to be with someone who sees me as fat and lazy with no good sides. I asked him to consider my good points rather than my bad ones. He said I want the perfect man who will be happy to support me and let me be fat. I said that I don't want PERfection, just AFfection.

I also told him how his attitude towards me is making ds see me as not very clever (with examples of ds' behaviour) and I think he was shocked.

He came up to me and hugged me, apologising for not showing me enough affection or that he loved me often enough. Kissed me on the hair like a child.

Since then, he has been sleeping in the bed again - just assumed that would happen, didn't ask me. Has got his feet under the table again. No cuddles.

oh dior - you need actions not words.

Will have a look in my diary and see what day we can do next week - can you do Tues or Thurs?

Not Tues now. Thurs is free.

I am keeping a list of all the things he has said and done recently, so I have ammunition if I do need to go to a Sol. I will be prepared this time.

ok dior will check today and get back to you - are you able to email me as i have a new computer and still havent updated all my email addresses and it would be quicker and easier (for me ) if you sent me one.

Dior - I am seething for you
"He said I want the perfect man who will be happy to support me and let me be fat"
He doesn't see it does he? Its not up to him to 'let' you be fat - its your body FFS! And yes he should bloody well support you whatever you weigh - that's the least he should do. He should love you for who you are not what you look like.
I wonder if you lost weight whether he'd find something else to criticise you for, will you ever measure up to his ridiculous standards? Do you even want to anymore?
LL - glad to hear baby is thriving. Get yourself on the facebook group and post some pics for all the broody teabags to drool over

Ginny - I have sort of accepted it now . Having said that, I am missing sex .

Thursday is good for me and i have already put it in the diary.

Dior - one word:

R A B B I T

Ginnny - I miss the whole shebang though (pun intended!)

HW - You are in my diary too. Will be in touch. x

Dior - he just doesn't get it does he. Very frustrating (and upsetting) for you. Head and brick wall spring to mind.

HW - I emailed you so you can let the other teabags know via the facebook group (which I am not a member of).

Hope everyone is ok(ish) x

Hi Everyone

Ladylush - glad to hear that DD is doing well - my DD was in an incubator for 7 weeks sooo much better when they are in a cot :-) Having a baby on NICU/SCBU really is horrible so firstly big hugs x

With regards to feeding DD was titchy so took a while to establish feeding. She only really started to feed the week before she was due and came home on her due date at which point she was still a titchy 4lb 4oz. Her size was the main obstacle to her feeding as it tired her out so much.

Do you have the support of an infant feeding counsellor? if not make sure you do mine was great and really helped to reassure me.

Best advice I could give is do as much skin to skin as possible and give her time. DD is almost 20mths old and is still BF in fact I love it so much just qualified as an BF peer support worker

I've posted quite a lot on the prem section of MN - under my other name - rascal1979

Please do email when you get chance and I'd be more than happy to help if I can.

Will catch up with you all properly soon x

MHIS - problem is I'm not producing much milk. She is over 2 weeks old now and I'd have expected my supply to have improved at this stage. The unit have given me a letter to give my G.P for prescription of Maxalon (Domperidone)10mg tds for 10 days. I thought this only works when you continue it so I don't know why they are suggesting prescription for 10 days?? I am currently boiling some barley to drink as tea as I was told that is supposed to help. Also taking fenugreek tablets. Had oats for breakfast this morning - also supposed to help.
DD was born weighing 3lb 9oz but she lost almost a pound in 1 week . Now regaining weight and yesterday weighed 3lb 5oz so almost back at birth weight.

Ladylush - try not to worry about how much milk you are producing. She will be only taking small amounts at the moment and ANY breast milk you can give her is fab.

If I remember two weeks in was when I felt as though my supply was dropping.

Key to making enough milk is to double pump every time you express using hopsital grade pump. Increase your pumping to two hourly for a few days and see if that helps. Are you pumping in the night? make sure you are pumping 8-10 times a day including at least once in the night - it's horrible having to do it but setting your alarm to make sure you get up is crucial! (the hormones released when you produce milk make you sleepy so not as bad as it sounds)

Prolactin levels are highest in the early hours so a pumping session at this time can really help increase your supply ( I found that an oat bar and large glass of water at this time helped too )

LOTS of skin to skin with baby. The more you do this the more she will stimulate your milk supply. Also pumping at her cot side where you can see and smell her (usually have screens to shield you - not the most dignified sight but works ) helps. If you don't feel comfortable try skin to skin immediately before you go and pump and take something that smells of DD with you and/or a photo of her.

Domperidone can kick start your supply but Skin to skin and pumping are the best ways to get your supply up and keep it going.

I also tried DD at the breast everyday - it helped so much with bonding and got her familiar with my boobies I found that if put her to the breast at the same time as I tube fed her she would respond better and try to suckle.

Have you been shown hand expression? Some find this helps to start your milk flowing.

Or stimulate your breasts by brushing from the outside to the niple with the heel/palm of your hand before expressing.

Warm flannels applied before you start pumping can help too.

Sitting for 5 min and closing your eyes before you pump to relax can help too.

So in summary

Skin to Skin
Double pumping
Make sure you are drinking and eating enough - Plenty of water - NICU is so hot you dehydrate quickly.
skin to skin
stimulate your breasts before pumping
skin to skin (!)
Pump 8-10 times a day
Skin to skin :-)

All babies loose weight. Don't forget your LO is workign so much harder to maintain her body heat and everything is that much more of a struggle cos she is still titchy so will be using calories.

Your breast milk is the best thing for her for nutrition, growth (more calories than formula etc) and bonding. You are doing amazing already. So few get to even two weeks xxx

If you get chance email and I can give you my mobile no. x

Big hugs you are doing FAB xx