FAB & GLAM 10 - Gosh, Do We Really Talk That Much???

[Dumbledior]

Hi, new thread

Lovely to see all the old posters again. Don't go now you are back.

Annie/UC/MHIS - lovely to see you and thanks MHIS for the FB chat.

LL - yes, I can!

Dior - do you mean yes to a meet up or yes you can bring friends dc to the the barber?

Meet up!

Just checking
Anyone else? And what suits everyone best - kids or no kids? If the latter, it will have to be evening for me (or weekend).

Tanee - how are you dear? Hope you are doing something nice this weekend.

Mind if I butt in too? I did meet Tanee once with DS4 in tow - he's very civilised, but then again he's old enough to stay at home if it's a no-kids do. I talk too much and am liable to hog the cakes, you have been warned.

Always good to have a chatterbox when you are meeting people you've never met - avoids the awkward silences! I'm more of a savoury person so at least we won't fight over the cake I do eat it sometimes but given a choice I'd much rather eat something savoury.

Mm, tuna and mayo sandwiches...

Oi watch it - now we will fight over those

I won't be able to make the meet up so both cakes and savouries are safe but would someone please take a group photo and email it to me so that I get to 'meet' you all too please. Thank you.

As you were.

Count me in! It would be lovely to see you all again

Great Ginnny - are you sweet or savoury?

I'm sweet - Annie's got a fight on her hands, especially.if there's chocolate involved!

Ah chocolate..............now that I do like

We'll just have to make sure there's a LOT of chocolate to go round.

So what are we thinking re kids or no kids?

Well, I'm always game for a meetup - the sooner the better - of course, in my case, no kids (DD enjoyed the last one, but she's got her own social life now). Lush, yes, some time with DD is good. She's not one for city breaks - and she's got things arranged with her friends most weekends, but we have days out together seeing exhibitions on my days off.

Weekend was ok - I'm being proactive and getting financial advice at some point - waiting for the adviser to get back from hols tomorrow - and I'm setting up flat viewings. Saw something last week which was ok, but no garden and 2nd bedroom was far too small. Ideally, would like to remortgage and release enough equity to pay DP off (IS he DP anymore? Or just my housemate...?) - while keeping the house. Not sure if that'll be possible - someone said I have lots of equity but I have a very unhealthy bank account. P knows I'm looking at flats, but hasn't commented. We've been polite and pleasant, and he still gives me a hug or kiss in the mornings, but it's very tentative - lots going on in our minds, but neither of us able to express it. Makes me sad that it's coming to this, that he'd rather we went through all this trauma of a break up, rather than get treatment, but I'm trying very hard to be positive and concentrate on ME. We're due to go to a festival next weekend with a friend of his. I was going to suggest he tells her that we won't be going, but he seems to still assume that we are. I'm not really looking forward to a weekend in a tent with him though there's always the chance we might get a chance to talk away from familiar ground. It all feels very unreal, but I'm ok. Sort of. (shaky )

I'm glad you are doing ok Tanee, stay strong, you are going to be just fine.

I wouldn't go away with him if you don't really want to. If you are going to go then be honest with yourself about why you are going. You seem to be still wanting a chance to talk to him. He will know full well you want to talk to him Tanee but he is denying you the opportunity. Don't waste any more of your precious time trying to flog a dead horse! And of course he will assume you are still going this weekend. He won't be talking you seriously yet and he will be using this weekend as a guide. If you go and you enjoy yourself with him he will see that as a sign that things are all right again, that he is forgiven and free to continue just as he has been doing.

Why not change the pattern? Give him a shock right now and when this weekend comes around just don't go. That will send him a message all right!!

I wouldn't go Tannee. Show him there are consequences, if you go it will only show him that he can carry on behaving like this. (((hug)))
re. the meetup, If its an evening thing then I won't bring the kids but will if its a daytime thing. I'll go with the flow!!!

I know - it's a bit complicated though, as I promised DD she could have a house party while we were away and she doesn't often get the chance these days, with P around all the time. If I don't go, I know he won't either, so his friend will be let down (she's depending on us for a lift and got us the passes on that basis). Annoying thing is, I really do want to go as it sounds an amazing fest (Vintage Goodwood) - if the passes were transferable, I'd take DD instead - but they are in our names. So I have very mixed feelings about not going. Once there, I shall probably spend most of my time going round all the vintage stalls on my own, anyway.

Oh, and I am aware that even if we did talk, it would be the old conversation, the old merry go round about selling up, no way back, blah blah blah... The record won't change, he's stuck in his groove. So I'm still going ahead with flat hunting and advice. Yes, there's a bit of me which HOPES for a breakthrough, but there's a bit of me that's rather looking forward to getting him out! I used to think that I'd miss having him around to talk to and do things with, but there's been so little talking or doing recently, less and less, that I'm feeling that the lack of his physical presence won't be such a loss, after all.

TFM - can I ask why you can't come to a meet-up now that you are a free woman? It would be a pleasure to meet you.

Well girls, you will be pleased to know that I am not thinking about barber so much any more. Phew! Things rolling along with h. We get on but don't really spend the evenings together. I am working hard on WW planning and he plays his XBox games...

You could always take your own tent Tannee!
After today - I would like to change my mind to DEFINITELY NO KIDS at the meetup, and could it last about a fortnight???
I'm at the end of my tether and we are only 2 weeks in to the holidays!!!

Dior London is a very very long way from my home and would be a very very expensive trip for me, so that's why I can't go to the meet up If ever you decide to meet ooop North somewhere I will be there!

If we go oop North it would have to be a weekender TFM - how many spare bedrooms do you have

I've got a very large garden Ginny so if you all brought tents!