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Original poster

Too much sex?

229 replies

exw88 · 15/08/2026 10:33

Been dating new man for 3 months.

It is very sex-centric, although we do have some deep conversations and quality time together too and dates without sex… but is mostly sex. He can turn any conversation into sex, this is daily.

I am attracted to him and the sex should be enjoyable on paper, he’s not selfish, is adventurous which I like… but he could want sex 3 times a day… not quick sessions this could be between 1-2hrs each.

I feel sore all the time, and tired. I can’t keep up with him!

He’s always suggesting more and more, new ideas for sex… says to keep things interesting. Sometimes I feel like I’m not performing well enough, or I’m not good enough at it because this suggestion makes it feel like he’s bored already.

At the same time he says it’s the best sex he’s ever had?!

I do enjoy his company and he is a nice guy, but I’m not sure if to end it because simply I can’t keep up with this. I am starting to dread having sex with him purely because I know how long it will be, and know I will be sore after. Both 30s if that matters.

OP posts:
AcrossthePond55 · 19/08/2026 16:43

exw88 · 19/08/2026 16:33

We both said once is plenty and obviously if anything else happens it does, don’t want to be relying on a set number etc would still like it to feel spontaneous.

Show quote history

That makes sense.

LouiseMadetheBestBroccoliPasta · 19/08/2026 21:58

What about the bit where he was pushing past you saying you were sore?

Does he understand that it's off to keep pushing for sex when the other party says it hurts?

Do YOU understand this?

olympicsrock · Yesterday 05:26

Well done OP. I do worry about your self esteem reading the way you write
“Feel I’m boring / not good enough’ , not capable of this , don’t have it in me.

What about saying to yourself and him - “I don’t ‘want’ sex for 2 hours 3 times a day or I don’t ‘enjoy ‘ prolonged penetrative sex. Women rarely do as they get sore!

I think he will always be a a sex pest and would end it !

Original poster
exw88 · Yesterday 19:57

LouiseMadetheBestBroccoliPasta · 19/08/2026 21:58

What about the bit where he was pushing past you saying you were sore?

Does he understand that it's off to keep pushing for sex when the other party says it hurts?

Do YOU understand this?

I’ve never said he “pushed”. I’ve said I feel like I’m into it and want the sex but then it just goes on way too long and I end up a little regretful. I don’t think I’ve been direct enough, I haven’t said “I’m too sore for sex”. I’ve said “I’m a bit sore” and he’s said “I’ll be gentler next time”.

I've spoken to him much more directly now and he seems to completely understand and agree. This week so far has been completely normal sex once for 30-45mins when I’ve seen him, we’ve been hiking and got a lovely day out planned for the weekend.

I think I will give him this chance and if it reverts to how it was I will have to end it.

OP posts:
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