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Relationships

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Husband lied to me for a year… and then walked out on me and our son.

205 replies

SilverFox96 · 08/05/2026 08:25

Hi, just looking for some advice or emotional support.

Have been with my DH for 10 years, married for 3 and have a nearly 2 year old DS. Just before Christmas I found out that he had been lying about working late for a whole year, instead of coming home he told me he was sitting in Morrisons car park instead as he couldn’t face the stress of coming home. I found out by looking through his work phone, he was very angry at me for doing so and says he can’t trust I won’t do it again.

He has always been a loving, hardworking man but has changed since we had our DS. He is withdrawn, uninterested in our life and says he has no freedom. After finding out about his lies he cried and begged me not to leave him, saying he will do anything, I asked for his location which he gave for a week and then said I was controlling and manipulative for asking.

4 weeks later, we put our house up for sale to move closer to family and 6 days later he walked out and didn’t come back. It’s now been 3 months and he will barely communicate, if he does it’s via very formal emails or crappy texts. I am embarrassed to say I begged and did the pick me dance for the first month.

I am distraught, he says there is no one else but it doesn’t make sense to me. We are now going to mediation over our son and finances as he won’t talk to me. He says there is nothing to talk about. He is angry we are going to mediation as it will cost him money as I get legal aid so won’t have to pay.

OP posts:
BeardySchnauzer · 26/05/2026 21:21

has this come out through mediation?

SilverFox96 · 26/05/2026 21:29

BeardySchnauzer · 26/05/2026 21:21

has this come out through mediation?

I have eased up on some of his requests through mediation. I held firm on some and he initially threatened me with court. He then came back and said he didn’t want to put us both through the stress and accepted those boundaries. I understand he would like to see DS as much as possible, it just hurts when he chose not to come home from work until late for a whole year, and lied instead. He didn’t want that time with him then.

OP posts:
BeardySchnauzer · 26/05/2026 21:31

Yes I agree

just don’t let him end up taking more than he’ll give you and if you think your son is suffering then you will need to step in. Hopefully it won’t come to that

Jennalong · 01/06/2026 16:35

It seems a little odd he is taking your son aged 2 on a camping trip .
Is it something your 2 year old has done in the past ?

SilverFox96 · 01/06/2026 19:55

Jennalong · 01/06/2026 16:35

It seems a little odd he is taking your son aged 2 on a camping trip .
Is it something your 2 year old has done in the past ?

His brother goes camping a lot and is really into fishing. He is also going with his 3 year old DD. Nothing that man does makes sense to me anymore, but I’m not sure what I can do about it.

OP posts:
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