Was I right to block him after another vague date plan, what am I doing wrong?

[Karlaken]

So I was talking to this one guy the end of last year, he begged me for a date the date came and he unexpectedly had a family emergency so I excused it. Things fell of from there, months later he comes back I entertain it cause I was bored my mistake. He organizes a date for this week asks me what I’m doing, if I’m free on certain days etc. This is him initiating to see me, I’m not asking him or even making an effort in our conversations. I agree he suggested a certain place and I declined and he said let’s do something else. So I agree to that.

So he said that he had a few spots he wanted to take me on. I ask him the name of the place he says “I don’t know the name I’m going to ask a friend”? Then he asks me if the certain time we agreed to still works I say yes. He still texting me as normal, I started to withdrawal cause I knew he was on some bull, you still haven’t given me the name of the spot?

Fast forward to the day of the “date” he sends me these texts

GOOD MORNINN
WAKE UP ITS A GOOD DAY FOR US
soo on this good day like this we gone have a good one…

So you’re texting me for what? There’s still no time, place, location, effort. He should have kept it playa and just said nothing today why even send a text.

Then he sends me a voice note at 3pm keep in mind our time was 7:30pm

“Work has been so busy today, so much stuff has happened. Did you still want to hang out later today, so and so is a good spot to go to”

BLOCKED.
That was it, I’m appalled I mean who do these men think I am? I try to give people the benefit of the doubt yet I feel like a laughing stock. I’m not sure what I’m dong wrong or what type of vibe I’m giving off to these weird men.

He told you the place though? I don’t get it.

I actually think when you rejected his first suggestion you should have offered an alternative. He says hey fancy skydiving, you say oh no I am scared of heights, how about sailing instead.

Yes he should have put in more effort. He ghosted you and returned with a half arsed attempt at woo-ing you. He wants to see if the door is still open. Though I wonder if he realises he is supposed to make a big effort to make up for ghosting. Probably obvious

Yeah, if a man wants you, you'll be in no doubt. The time, place, the details etc. Same with their communication.

Date 1 basic is ok (and safe) quick coffee etc. But if theres a date 2 see what A game he brings.

If you feel confused or unsure, hes not interested in you.

You shouldn't have engaged with him after the ghosting. You knew what you were letting yourself in for 🤷‍♀️

Are you confused OP? I don’t understand what you are stating and I am not sure you do,too…

I think all this game playing nonsense is why there is a lot of single people out there

'see what A game he brings'

Ridiculous.

I’m not sure if the OP is in the UK? Dating in the US (which this sounds like) seems wildly different to how we do it here 🤣

UPDATE

I ended up going out with him yesterday night. I was a little late which I apologized for. He comes down to get me and gives me a hug and we walk up. He’s staring at me super nervously, we walk into the restaurant he doesn’t hold open the door for me. Yet instead tells me he’s going to the bathroom, red flag. As I’m waiting he comes out of the bathroom, looks at me then goes back into the bathroom?

4 minutes go by and I feel a tap on my back and he’s on the phone, he tells me that he’s taking a call and that he’s just going to finish it super quick? So I see him walking around on this call for like 2 minutes. I decided to go to the bathroom and once I come back out he’s gone.

I get a text from him that says
Sorry my cousin calling me with sum important
I have to go get him right now I’m sorry, his bm (baby mom) just kicked him out

I was appalled truly shocked. I’ve never had a man do this and I’ve been on a lot of dates. I’m a beautiful woman that does look like my pictures, maybe he didn’t think so? I’m really not trying to make this about me, cause I didn’t deserve that. I feel played and extremely embarrassed

I ended blocking him for good.
Im still in shock truly…….

He sounds absolutely vile.

But you'd blocked him when you were about to meet him and then, what unblocked him and hastily agreed to meet? All sounds highly dysfunctional

Tbh I’m not sure and knew I should have listened to my gut!

about to hours after he left the date he posted himself out at a bar laughing ….

Don't look him up! Just block him everywhere - and this time don't then unblock him and message him.

He's a nasty piece of work.

What do you think the reasoning was ? He

• he couldn’t sit down
• went to the bathroom twice
• paced on the phone
• left within minutes

Agree with this. He sounds flakey. I wouldn’t have blocked though.

Lol, what an idiot. Dealing drugs most likely

Why are you even giving this head space

And drugs is your answer.

Yeah didn’t see your update. Bet he was doing drugs. He sounds chaotic. Block him and don’t look back.

It's impossible to say beyond he is a terrible person.

But the whole date was so dysfunctional that he probably didn't care how badly he was behaving.

If you're blocking someone a few hours before meeting them for the first time, that's usually a sign that it's not going to be a good date.

Drugs was my first thought too!

This happened.

Yes unfortunately

He sounds weird ans it sounds like a him problem.

OLD is utterly grim so hand hold.

If my dh died (god forbid) I don't think id ever borher again

Read the update. Why did you go on a date after blocking him? All sounds odd. Mismatched.

People keep saying on another forum, it was because he was attracted to me ?

If he was attracted to you, he wouldn't behave like a twat and mess you about. He's just another absolute jerk, block and move on!

You’re the problem OP. You’ll never find anyone unless you lighten up a bit.

I have NO idea why you blocked him. I read your OP more than once and I couldn’t see what he’d done wrong.

This man ghosted me for 4 months after he planned a date and didn’t follow through with it. He ended up coming back and I gave him the benefit of the doubt. So how am I the problem? Did you even read the update