The Dating Thread 57 - The Darling Buds

[Nosdacariad]

The Rules:
-The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating
-Develop a thick skin
-Do not invest emotionally too soon
-It’s all BS until it actually happens
-Trust your gut instinct
-People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
-Know your worth
-If it's not fun, stop
-Loo update is mandatory
-No dating the thread
-Treat others as you'd like to be treated
-Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
-The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

• If you're wondering if you're being too picky/should give another chance after the second chance/should try harder - the answer is invariably NO! You're not and you shouldn't. If this, now, is as good as it's going to get, the A game, then do you want what comes next?!

-OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

Well...

I said I think you should ask me out
He said "will you go out with me" (what people of our era would have done as teens!)
I said yes
He said "are we boyfriend and girlfriend now"
I asked if he wanted us to be & he said yes😅

Omg so lovely 😍 so pleased for you xx

The cuteness of that reminds me of my DP on our 2 month anniversary messaging me a poem and asking me to be his girlfriend (I was sat by him 😂) it was so cute I still go all silly inside thinking about it lol

Lovely news @Nosdacariad 😀

Oh that's very sweet, I love it! So happy for you.

Ohhhh - I absolutely love it 🥰

Keep on keeping us updated though!

I absolutely love this too 🥰 - what a lovely memory for you.

Has he set a date for the reschedule or left it open?

Congratulations 🥳There’s hope for us all. ❤️

That’s so much more straightforward than the anguish of not knowing where you stand. Maybe we all need to go back to the ‘old ways’!

I’m really pleased for you! :)

I might be seeing Mr Situationship for a quick drink later. I’m mad. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I did that on Sunday 🤦🏻‍♀️ solidarity!

Ah why not ladies - we all need a bit of fun - just protect your hearts is all I’d say.

I saw my FWB over the weekend too. Sometimes you just need to cut loose a little with Mr Right Now, while you are waiting for Mr Right to take his sweet time to manifest .....

This is brilliant news! He's a lucky Planes!

The picture he sent of the puppy, it's wearing clothes! I strongly suspect he just pulled a cute puppy pic off the internet to give his story veracity.....

And he has yet to fix another date. Hmm.....

The only thing is, I fail to see how our current chat can be serving him any purpose. It's the least sexy chat ever! Unless he gets off on seeing pictures of meals I have cooked.....

Anyway, I'm not doing any chasing, so if he wants to rearrange, he'll have to make the running with that.

I'm actually more excited about my other iron, Mr Beach, who I am seeing next week (unless a kitten needs rescuing, or perhaps a little fluffy chick.....) I do feel like we have more in common - but obviously trying not to over think it, or become too positive about him before we have even met.

Might do a bit of swiping tonight, feel like I have more chance of keeping Beach in perspective if I can rustle up another iron or two.....

Yes I think you are right. It’s self protection.

I’m just in such a better place in terms of my life compared to any time I was in a relationship. Mentally I’m in an amazing place and such an easy breezy, smiley person to be around.

Maybe it’s just my luck but I’ve found men emotionally such hard work in a committed relationship scenario - socially I love men and find them so easy to get on with. In my experience they have so many random moods and need so much help or attention, it’s like having a dependant. Even years later I’m getting emotional voice mails from exes in a crisis.

Maybe I’m just a cold fish but I feel you’ve really got to love the person massively to commit to this extent. I find they primarily want to connect emotionally whereas I’d like to connect more physically

I’d love to meet someone who can mostly cope with themselves. I’d also be open to a more casual connection but even my most recent casual connection is still texting me months after we finished, I’m not sure men can do casual 🙈

At the moment I’m definitely in a mindset where I’d consider more people, I am constantly checking guys out when out and about. But then write them off 5 seconds later.

I’m going out a fair few times this week so let’s see if I’ve got balls to have a conversation with someone!

Starting to wish I had a FWB 🙈 Really missing make company and my situation with my irons seems to change day to day.

From last time I updated-

Mr Bushes - I realised he wasn’t verified (ROOKIE mistake!). He disappeared when I asked him to do so.

Mr Injured - Chat just seemed to fizzle out.

Mr Tennis - As above.

———————————————————-

Currently chatting with-

Mr Young - He’s a few years younger than me, hence the name. I’m not feeling the spark or connection through the messages and I’m the one asking all the questions with not much back. Told him I wasn’t feeling it and he said he’s just not good via text and is much better in person. Hasn’t suggested a date.

Mr Chatty - All seems okay so far. Lots of chatty messages. He lives about 40 miles away but works near me, asked to meet for a coffee tonight on way home from work but I’ve been up to my eyes with my own work and travelling this week so I declined. Not sure how I feel.

Mr Blondie - He’s been away for work and travelling so the chat hasn’t been consistent, but he’s very easy on the eye. Other factors are a positive too though 😂

(sorry for the long update!)

@empirebiscuits12 Sounds like Mr Blondie could be promising? And like you hound unmatch Mr Young

@ElleintheWoodsGlad to hear you’re feeling like you’re overall in a good place with life. Sounds like you jut need to meet someone who is as self sufficient as you are. I’m a bit the same really.

Didn’t happen. :(. Now ignoring my messages.

@Ilovelurchers Yeah that sounds suspicious, good idea to let him do the chasing. And I know what you mean about having another iron to keep things in perspective. The longer I’ve been OLD the more I realise it’s best not to get invested too soon. I definitely did that way back at the beginning 🤦‍♀️

@CleanShirt@duckingcluelessSolidarity. I rescheduled my date with Mr Charismatic to Friday night. I’m actually really looking forward to it, despite the ongoing situationship status. There will be some very nice wine, dinner, a film, and I’m making a chocolate mousse cake for dessert 🍮

@NosdacariadAwwww that is too cute!

The way to a man’s heart….🍀

Hmmmm so Mr Nomad has just booked flights to come visit me in a month’s time. He’s also been invited to his friend’s birthday dinner while he’s here and I’m invited as his plus one. It will be nice to see him but no wonder I never seem to find time to date anyone who actually wants a relationship 🤦‍♀️