To think this message absolutely does equal a dumping ?

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Together just over two years. We don’t live together (by choice we both have older children).

Spend two or three nights a week seeing each other, stay over one or two nights every few weeks.

Spent the night together last week, no issues, great night together. The next day chatting away as normal and then I get a message saying he “has a lot on and so could we not see each other for the next 8 weeks”. I’m not sure what you’re supposed to say to that? To me it’s a soft dumping. I didn’t respond and an hour later had a message asking if I was ok.

I was at work so couldn’t call but just said “look not sure how you meant that message to land but sounds very much like you don’t want to see me anymore; if that’s the case then I don’t really know what else you want me to say, I’m not going to be messed around etc etc”.

He messaged back saying “you sound annoyed today?!”

I’ve ignored and we haven’t spoken for two days.

I can’t wrap my head around it

Hang around for 8 weeks while he does what exactly? I’d take that as an end. Should be a deep conversation after 2 years, not a breezy text without considering your feelings.

8 weeks is a bit precise. I’d dump him.

It's definitely odd, especially as he's given you a specific time frame. Like what is he doing for those 8 weeks where he can't/won't/doesn't want to see you?

I'd delete & block tbh. He is messing you about.

He’s : working on his fitness. Finishing a project at work. A few other things.

It is ODDLY specific isn’t it.

and yes exactly, should I just wait around for 8 weeks?

If there has been some kind of build up to it that he was working away or concentrating on a large project that for some bizarre reason he may not have any free time it could be discussed but instead he's just dropped it in casually and told you that you'll have to put the relationship on hold!

I just wouldn't even bother ever replying to him again and would just block him.

I think as an adult in a 2 year relationship, I would not text that kind of a question. I would feel that it needed explanation and discussion.

It sounds like quite a selfish thing to ask you to be agreeable to without any concrete reason. Working on your fitness and being busy at work are quite selfish reasons for not being able to see you at least once a week.

Yeah, why 8 weeks particularly? And then what will change?

Let's make it 8 lifetimes, k.

That's what I would send. And yes, that's a weird dump. It's so specific with no discussion of why and of course the time would drag on and on with no contact.

No no - “we can still talk”, he just doesn’t want to see me!

Im not free emotional support

Yes this. He should have talked to you about it if he is genuinely too busy to meet. Or at the very veryvery bare minimum least, apologised for NOT having talked when you were together.

He needs to develop a theory of mind, ie have a think about how other people might have their own position and life. I think usually children begin to develop this around the age of three or four.

It's a rude and lazy message. I agree with the others that I'd just write this one off.

No thanks. I'm not hanging around waiting on you for a couple of months or so. Let's just move on.

This is him ending it in a very clumsy way. So he gets the emotional support he needs whilst stringing you along. It’s giving him the option of coming back if it works for him in the future.
You deserve better. Move on and find someone who does value you.

Huh just seen his reasons. You are getting in the way of his fitness regime?? What the hell???

I hope his abs prove good company as it's gonna be a lonely life for him otherwise 😐😐😐

I'd be dumping him as there's no real reason for it, we all have busy lives. If he can live without me for 8 weeks, he can live without me for longer.

Agree with PP. Rude, lazy and self gratifying because he doesn't have to be the bad person who ends things definitively and says 'sorry, you're wonderful but It's not working for me'. Instead he's left you guessing. Don't be his emotional dumping ground. Your time is valuable.

8 weeks is very specific and is a common sentence for drug possession.

That’s so bizarre. He must think you’re stupid to just say ‘yeah ok that’s fine’. I’d just leave it now and see if he gets in touch.

Sounds as though he’d like you to hang about as a back up shag,

Interesting!

It is weirdly specific.

should I just wait around for 8 weeks?

Only if you want to hand over all power in the relationship and set fire to your self respect. Which is possibly what he wants.

Oh, you can still talk?😮

How generous! What a man among men!

I hope he drops a weight on his foot.

I think I would reply that that is fine... And then never see him again.

Unless maybe he is having surgery or something? Turkey teeth?

This is very odd. Did he give his reasons in the original, "can't see you for 8 weeks" message or is that from subsequent conversations. I only ask becuase if it was a reasoned, thought out message from him with details and explanations I'd STILL be very annoyed, but I'd have a slightly different response.

Overall though, I think the answer to his "you sound annoyed" message is, "yes, of course I'm annoyed. we've been together for 2 years and you've just decided that we need a break for 8 weeks, all on your terms, no discussion. Why would I NOT be annoyed by that?"

"Yes I am annoyed. If you won't make time for our relationship then it's not of much value to you. I'm not a toy to be picked up and put down when you feel like it. Consider us through."

Or something better 😁

"Kthxbai" might do it.