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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH says I am lying about fertility results

183 replies

imsolosthere · 02/03/2025 09:23

I have a previous thread where i explained my situation and back story

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5277977-i-want-to-leave-dh-but-feel-stuck?page=2

Yesterday DH says for the last 5 months (im 6 months pregnant with our fifth) that he is convinced I lied to him 12 years ago about fertility results. He said he has spoken to two consultants who have told him what i have said cant be true.

When i was 24 I had concerns about my fertility due to a long history with period problems but have been checked for PCOS and it being confirmed I did not have it. My GP sent me to a fertility clinic for tests. I cant remember the exact details but I have requested my reports from them now. I do know that i was told my egg count was 13 which was very low for my age and that if i wanted children I should get started now. So then BF (now DH) agreed and we had our first and soon after our second.

We then talked about a 3rd a few years later and again I went for the same tests to see where we stood. I was told my egg levels were 7 and that at this rate I would be infertile by the age of 30.

We are now pregnant with our 5th. Pregnancy has never taken more than a few months, so he is convinced I doctored the letters from the clinic back then to trick him into having kids.

He wants to meet with the fertility clinic to check what i have told him all them years ago, I have no issues with this as i know i havnt told lies on this.

Im just so lost and stuck, I have told him not to speak to me unless its about the children, im so low and spend too much time crying. My whole pregnancy has been unhappy. Im trying to find ways out but none seem possible

OP posts:
allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 06/03/2025 19:32

@imsolosthere I think I would possibly pay for a child minder to stay while you check out the holiday home. whose laptop did you check his email on? can you take the laptop into shop and get them to crack the code or at least put a keystroke logger on?? (I know, I know!!)

imsolosthere · 06/03/2025 19:34

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 06/03/2025 19:32

@imsolosthere I think I would possibly pay for a child minder to stay while you check out the holiday home. whose laptop did you check his email on? can you take the laptop into shop and get them to crack the code or at least put a keystroke logger on?? (I know, I know!!)

It’s really too far of a drive honestly we are talking hours

it’s his work laptop so can’t take it

OP posts:
allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 06/03/2025 20:14

@imsolosthere It’s really too far of a drive honestly we are talking hours

what about parking near his work to see if he meets anyone ?

imsolosthere · 06/03/2025 20:35

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 06/03/2025 20:14

@imsolosthere It’s really too far of a drive honestly we are talking hours

what about parking near his work to see if he meets anyone ?

Yeah possibly, there is a woman he works with who has been at the back of my mind before. They go running together durning lunch some days and sometimes at the weekend. She is single and they do txt each other, iv seen the messages and they are mostly about their run times and work stuff

OP posts:
Imbusytodaysorry · 07/03/2025 22:47

@imsolosthere how are you ?

imsolosthere · 08/03/2025 12:14

Imbusytodaysorry · 07/03/2025 22:47

@imsolosthere how are you ?

Thank you for asking.

im still the same no better, no worse. I had to cancel my therapy appointment on Friday as I had a child sick from school so didn’t feel I could talk freely and knew I’d be upset after it

OP posts:
Imbusytodaysorry · 08/03/2025 12:45

imsolosthere · 08/03/2025 12:14

Thank you for asking.

im still the same no better, no worse. I had to cancel my therapy appointment on Friday as I had a child sick from school so didn’t feel I could talk freely and knew I’d be upset after it

That’s a shame . Did he go away for the weekend. ?

imsolosthere · 08/03/2025 12:46

Imbusytodaysorry · 08/03/2025 12:45

That’s a shame . Did he go away for the weekend. ?

He’s planning it for next weekend

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