Earrings found and they aren’t mine! WWYD?

[Strugglingmama1]

In brief, I found a pair of earrings behind my air fryer when I was cleaning and they aren’t mine. I’ve asked all my children and they are adamant they aren’t theirs and haven’t seen them.

my husband works away. I’m a SAHM so always here.

If this was you, what would you be thinking? Because my mind is in a mess

Thanks!

Not far fetched. My first thought would be anything random on the kitchen side in my house is usually stuff I've fished out of pockets. Very plausible explanation that they've been in his pocket and he's quickly shoved them out of sight to avoid being found when putting stuff on to wash. Who does his washing? Him or you?

I think if they were another woman’s they’d be chucked out, he’s not likely to leave them in the house behind the air fryer when women normally use the kitchen most………say he had cheated I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t be left in your home………a bloke trying to hide another woman would get rid of the evidence straight away not leave it in the kitchen, there’s got to be another reason here……..

It sounds like these earrings were hidden. They don’t tend to fall off down the back of an air fryer ( sofa perhaps)

and if someone hid them it’s because you finding them would be a problem. It’s not the kids- it’s him. And OP, I think your theory is probably the most likely.

im
really sorry but I hope this gives you the resolve to leave him.

@Strugglingmama1

Part of me wishes he had had an affair so I could get out, even though I’m scared.

Love, you don't need him to have an affair for you to leave. As far as your children, honestly, it's more important for you to be safe and happy than to be able to 'blame' him to them for separating. A happy mum means happy children. In the long run they will resent him for dragging them into it, especially when they see how much happier and peaceful you are.

I hope you read this, but if you do my advice to you is to see a solicitor. Get informed about what a divorce may mean to you as far as the house, the children, and financial settlements. It doesn't mean you're going to 'do anything' you're just educating yourself and knowledge is power.

Please contact WA and talk to them about verbal and emotional abuse, and coercive behaviour. Learn about it and decide if you're a victim. They can also offer you advice in getting out right away or 'surviving' in the same house until you can leave.

And you don't have to go thru this alone. Reach out to trusted friends and family. Lean on them.

Agree, I wouldn’t be worrying about this at all!

Did the earrings have backs on them or did they not? If they did it suggests someone wearing them deliberately took them off and put them there to keep safe. If back were not on then maybe they were lost in a wild moment! Who knows? Hope you get the answers you need

@Strugglingmama1 I left my 15 yr old son alone for a weekend, {He was usually very sensible } and I got back earlier than expected- and girl's earrings were on the table ..He'd had a small party with friends.
No harm done..Hope your 'earrings' have an innocent explanation.

Usually if someone is staying the night they take their earrings off.

A kitchen is a strange place to leave them.

To lose a PAIR of earrings in a wild moment?
That's going some!

I see you mean stud type with the backs.. agreed , or maybe they are fish hook type. Or actual ''rings''.

But have you ever lost TWO in a wild moment???

@Strugglingmama1 A very very long shot..could your husband be a cross dresser?

Pink and dangly is rather a cross dresser trope.

@Strugglingmama1 Please leave..if you are unhappy you and the children deserve much better 👍 .
Good Luck, you can do it if you choose to. 🍀

No! But I’m sort of feeling maybe I’ve missed out!

Ok. Mind yourself. Once children are involved it’s very hard to leave.

I hope you will be ok x

also we have no sex life (I don’t want to, it’s a LONG story), but the lack of sex is a huge issue for him. So that’s why I’m suspicious

Well why are you surprised?

The marriage is over, leave.

Probably your daughter's friend's earrings. Such a teen girl thing to lose.

Regardless, you don't need permission or mystery earrings to end a relationship you are unhappy in.

Pink dangly earrings sound like something a barmaid in the 70s would wear, or a child

No cats… nothing/nobody at all to blame… odd isn’t it?

Now that is an option I hadn’t considered!

Like the old old joke.. {Works better spoken aloud}

''Newlyweds check into a nice hotel on their honeymoon.
^^
Wife is asked ''you have booked the bridal suite?''
^^
Bride replies ..Oh no thanks, I'll hang on by his ears''
^^

How old are your children?
Since daughter about 12, random jewelry of her friends around house.
now they are 16, 18, 20 boys & girl children
i find earrings singles, pairs - all over house, no one ever “misses” them, all inexpensive

if i ask. Does this belong to you or friend, it’s as always no

Oh no...''Phrogging''- that's really eerie.

I bolted my loft access after hearing about that, and after seeing ''Hellraiser'' where some horrible thing lived in the roof space.

Are you thinking DH brought a woman to your house, they stripped off and had sex in the kitchen, and then she made him some chips in the air fryer?

I found a random scrunchy in our home that my daughter said definitely wasnt hers, it was weeks later we remembered her friend had stayed over and it was hers. I think they're your daughters friends. maybe as someone else said, they were sore so took them out.

OP I hope that you come back to see this message.

You do not need anyone's permission to leave.

You don't need him to have had an affair. You don't need anyone on here to tell you that he has had an affair. You can leave just because you're unhappy. Please contact any family or friends who could support you in real life. Contact woman's aid if you feel trapped

You don't have to live like This!!