Greeting partner at the door when returns from work

[nextwed14]

Do you greet your husband/partner at the door when they return from work?? I am usually busy cooking dinner or tidying up when he comes home so I usually carry on doing what I am doing rather than meet him in the hallway. He says I am cold towards him and he would love me to leave what I am doing to greet him as he walks in the door after a busy day at work. I would never expect him to do that to me and would find it weird if he did.

I am finding him becoming very needy lately whereas I am the opposite and have never been quite as needy for affection and attention.

Depends how busy/ where I am.

Pottering in the kitchen? Yes
Working upstairs in the study? No way

Are you from different cultures?

In some relationships I’ve done it, in others I haven’t. However I’m now buying into the idea that physical contact is actually really important in relationships and I think in my next relationship I would do that, and generally act a bit more bothered about them as opposed to trying to seem cool.

Now that I’ve observed how me and ex used to be, no wonder we broke up.

Think back to when you were dating. Being greeted at the door and being kissed off was lovely wasn’t it? At what point does it stop?

His overall neediness points to another issue though. Does he think your head is turned maybe?

I would take this as an opportunity to completely clown. Like when he comes home next time, give one kid his slippers, one kid a tobacco pipe or a beer or whatever, one kid his smoking jacket and a newspaper, then you slide a crown on his head from Halloween and bow down and say: "Your Royal Majesty we, your loyal subjects welcome you back from the savage wars and are happy to see you are unscathed from battle!"

Contempt 😳

Obvs in minority. We have always done this just to acknowledge the other person and thought it was just normal. Def dont agree its needy. It feels a bit sad if their presence at home means that little to you that a two second hello hug is too demanding and you ignore each other. There will always be jobs to do but family is precious and sometimes rather fragile.

I think these small gestures that make us all feel we count and matter to our nearest and dearest can have a big cumulative effect. If it matters to your DH is it really that costly to do something that makes him feel you are happy he’s home?

No, he normally gets home while I'm preparing dinner or dealing with the dcs so I'm always in the middle of something. The dcs will often stop what they're doing and rush upstairs to greet him though.

Sometimes he comes home earlier to wfh, and generally we do just ignore each other, because he's still in work mode and we just want to get on with doing our own things.

If DH ever came to greet me at the door I would assume someone had died!

Every house I've ever lived in has been small enough that the main hall and front door is like two steps way, unless upstairs.

Poke me head around the door,
"Alrighty cuntybollocks?"

Obviously, op, if you're having to trek the several minutes from the west wing to the main foyer.. that would be a different story. Perhaps he could come in through workmen's entrance and forgo the usual greeting by the other staff upon his glorious return?

This thread is giving me a lot if reassurance. One of my exH's many complaints about me was that I didn't stop what I was doing to greet him when he got home from work. I was generally in the middle of cooking dinner and looking after 3 small children including a baby and a toddler when he got in. Relieved to see most people think his request was unreasonable.

Or he has got a cork up his srse and wants it pulled out

This thread sounds insane no i don't have his pipe and slippers waiting at the door for his majesty's arrival

Get a dog. My husband gets the best greeting every day when he gets home, I'm usually still working or in the kitchen.

Nope. Our dogs have that covered 😂

Absolutely true, but he’s already feeling a bit neglected, its a slippery slope.
men and women want to feel appreciated in marriage - plenty of women on here prove that.

This thread has given me an ear worm.

The dogs have the welcoming committee covered.

Nah, partly because he needs to get in the door and mainly because I'd be at risk of treading on the cat doing her best Railway Children 'Daddy! My Daddy!' impression at him.