My husband punched me in the face

[Helpmetalktomeplease]

He hit me in the face into the stone floor twice my lips swollen my cheek is blue and swollen. I ran upstairs with my phone to call the police but he snatched it I yelled out the window to help and call the police but no one heard/cares. Now I'm just frozen and scared I don't know what to do.... I do but I'm too scared he pays for everything if I call the police he'll lose his job and we'll lose the house and I'm so scared the kids will be taken away. He's getting angry now that I won't watch TV with him he keeps angrily saying "I said I was sorry" but he's not he's cross I'm not over it yet. I just want someone to talk to right now, womens aid were busy, my family won't care and my friends arent very close to me, they can't help. I have no one

This isn't helpful. OP needs support, especially right now.

OP had just been the victim of a violent attack. As someone who has been in the same situation could you not have some empathy

Getting help is far more important, being beaten with kids there superpasses any worry about anything else. What if next time it's fatal, no Mum, Dad in prison? Get out NOW! As others have said 999, yes it is that important! Sending love, you can do better and why would you think your kids would be taken off you when it's him they need to be away from? Xx

Exactly, your colleagues will be there for you. Xx

If you work for the policeyou’ll know that it will happen again and he will escalate. Is this really how you want your dc to grow up?

I hope you called the police.

Me too.

A policeman who beats his wife.

A policeman who may well be called to other violent incidents where there are vulnerable women and children.

Not a suitable man to be in that role, clearly.

@Helpmetalktomeplease you must phone the police ... 🙏

@oakleaffy where does it say he's a policeman?

Clearly if the husband is a policeman then he shouldn't be in that job - but OP has a completely legitimate concern that no job = no money for the family with all the ramifications that that has.

Unfortunately dv is endemic in the police force and the military.

Things are often much more complicated even than ringing the police.

OP in spite of that, the violence you describe is utterly vile. It will only get worse and the kids will be damaged. Please do call 999. Immensely hard I know.

'working for the police' could mean the OP has an admin job in the police force.

OP I expect some people already know what he's doing to you.
But they won't want to say anything or interfere.

He's now hit you in the face so he will know everyone can see the damage.

You're at risk of this escalating because what has he to lose if you're showing injuries?

You probably need to see a doctor and maybe have a broken cheek bone.

Make those calls.

So many women reach out on this forum and yet nothing changes.
They get advice and support here, then disappear and no one knows how they are.

These men should be behind bars for a very long time.

Please call for help.

I'm so sorry that you have to go through this, and no matter how alone you feel you are not. Countless women suffer physical abuse by the hands of a man that claim to love them. There is support out there if you really want it. There are resources for abused and battered women including therapy and groups where you can draw strength and support. I know that this is your husband, but I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to tolerate this behavior. No man has the right to put his hands on a woman whether he's your spouse or not. I don't like to encourage divorce or breakups, but sometimes staying in this type of situation can hurt more than leaving. I don't know if this is the first time that he has hit you, and if it's not, you may want to think about leaving. This can get much worse if you stay and some women end up dead not thinking that their partner would go that far. So all I'm saying is look at the history of his abuse and try to decide if keeping your family life with him is worth all of that. If you really want to stay in your marriage you might want to suggest him going to therapy or even anger management so he can learn to control his temper. Because whatever he was feeling at that moment, wasn't an excuse for him to lose control and cause you physical harm as well as scars and bruises to follow. Be strong and try to utilize the resources that I mentioned. Maybe one day after you do, you'll have the courage to walk away. But as for now, remember, you are not alone and there is help and support if you really need it.

Are you still following @Helpmetalktomeplease?

Please, please, if not for your own sake, for that of your innocent children, phone the police and remove you all from this nightmare x

OP I hope your silence means that the police have come and that you are looking after your children. Please let us know you are ok.

You need medical attention to. You might have a.broken cheek bone

@TotteringonGently I'd not assume anything. It's shocking how many women post about abuse but can't follow through and ask for help.

Your life is already ruined. Get help.

Please leave and don't look back. My 29 year old colleague was murdered by her partner this year. He 'wasn't the violent type' before he killed her.

I said 'hope' because I really hope it isn't the alternative. She knows what she should do but I am not underestimating how paralyzing terror can be.

OP, please do check in and let us know that you are ok.

Listen to @MammaKel . He will kill you if you stay.

I know it feels like you have no choice at all but you do. You will not lose your kids. You work with police so some income will come in. Life will be economically tough but things will get better. The alternative is that:
He will kill you. Then he will be arrested for murder. Your children will go into care and grow up with the trauma of having watched their dad beat their mum and knowing he killed her. So do you want to experience momentary harship with your kids then back on your feet and happy? Or do you want to die at his hands and leave the kids without you? Not watch them grow? Please, make the right choice now. You are young enough to start over.

Hope you are ok.

You need to get help asap. If you can’t do it for you, do it for your kids. Domestic violence ruins kids lives and their future health and well-being.

Uou can do this. If it’s not safe to do it now then as soon as you can.

Good luck. You have the MN army behind you. 💐

Please, please make that call we beg you! Don't end up another DV statistic, be strong, everyone deserves to know what a shit bag he is and you and your children deserve a good life.

I hope you’re safe OP. I really hope you’ve called the Police and you’ve got some help.
If you’ve not called them please do.

Are you ok op? It can be intimidating when everyone is telling you to do the thing, that you’re scared to do. But we’re here for you and we care. Lean in to the strength - there are so many women here who have been where you are. We’ve got you.

I held back from 999 so often. It felt like nuclear option. For 12 years.

It finally ended when he tried to strangle me. He was removed and not allowed to come back. Is only not in prison because the police fucked it up.

It ramped up. Each time it was worse because by doing nothing the previous time he knew he could do what he liked and I would take it.

I too thought that everything would fall apart, and you know what? It didnt. I found a strength I didnt know I had, a confidence that had long been lost to his abuse and the ability to stand up for myself. The worst of it was not what it did to me, but what it did to my children. If not for you then call 999 for them. They do not deserve to live in the same house as a violent abuser. They wont be taken from you for getting rid of him, you will be praised for protecting them by removing him from your lives.