My husband punched me in the face

[Helpmetalktomeplease]

He hit me in the face into the stone floor twice my lips swollen my cheek is blue and swollen. I ran upstairs with my phone to call the police but he snatched it I yelled out the window to help and call the police but no one heard/cares. Now I'm just frozen and scared I don't know what to do.... I do but I'm too scared he pays for everything if I call the police he'll lose his job and we'll lose the house and I'm so scared the kids will be taken away. He's getting angry now that I won't watch TV with him he keeps angrily saying "I said I was sorry" but he's not he's cross I'm not over it yet. I just want someone to talk to right now, womens aid were busy, my family won't care and my friends arent very close to me, they can't help. I have no one

Call 999 from a mobile

If you don't speak or answer questions, press 55 or tap when prompted and your call will be transferred to the police. The police will usually be able to find your location.

Please call the police.

He has physically assaulted you and shown no remorse (sounds like his ‘sorry’ was empty) and It will happen again.

He is mentally abusing you by making you think you need him and that you are the problem if you report him. It is on HIM. HIS behaviour has caused this.

please leave and don’t look back.

Next time he may kill you.

If he doesn't kill you and you stay with him out of fear of losing everything for years. Think about the kind of role model you will both be to your children.

If you have a son he may end up like your husband.

If you have a daughter she maybe end up like you.

I hope you find a safe way out of this.

Yes they'd know how incredibly brave you are for reporting this to the Police and getting yourself and your children to safety. That's what I would think and hope they would too. It takes so much strength to just do what you're doing now seeking advice and calling womens aid.

I hope you get to safety soon OP. Please call the Police for your own sake and for your children's sake.

Your lives will be ruined permanently if he murders you and there's a bloody high chance of that happening right now. If it does, your kids will most likely end up in care with one parent dead and the other in jail. Stop dithering and report him to the police.

Abusers often weaponise the police against women - if he phones 999 you will be the perpetrator until proved otherwise. It comes down to who calls 999 first. Make sure it’s you before it crosses his mind to spin a story about how you’ve self-harmed, don’t give him time to fake some injuries to himself. Do it before he grabs your phone again.

We're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.
We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Domestic Violence page. Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

https://www.mumsnet.com/i/domestic-violence-webguide

What are you going to tell them tomorrow.? Clumsy mummy tripped over. I can't come to your nativity or school play as I look a state. Fuck that just leave.

Who cares about everyone else?
Do the right thing - so he can't do it again either to you or anyone else xx

I hope you're ok

Dont you think people should know that he batters his wife?

He won't necessarily lose his job unless he's convicted. And there's no guarantee that's likely to happen.

What would you say to your daughter if she was in the same position?

OP you really need to start planning what your life will be like without him. You are caught in the fear of having nothing to the extent you are putting your life and your children’s well being at risk.

You cannot stay with him and have your children’s well being be unaffected by the violence. There is no way. It is an abusive home and it is abusive to them too even if his violence is only directed at you. You need to let go of the idea of staying in the house and having him be the source of your money.

You are worried about Social Services taking your children but they will only do this if you don’t protect your children - and protecting them requires you to leave this violent man.

Call the police and get the ball rolling. It wil be scary and hard. There will be set backs. Your life will change. But you really need to do it. It is the only way to a better life. One that isn’t doesn’t risk you losing your life and leaving your kids without a mother. One where fear doesn’t dictate your waking hours and keep you from sleep. One where your kids don’t grow up to repeat the same dynamic.

@Helpmetalktomeplease

I hope you’re ok. Never stay with someone who hits you. Get out of there. Whether it’s planning a careful exit when he’s at work, or leaving now, only you will know best way for least potential danger.
But you mustn’t stay with someone like this. Your kids will not be removed from you unless you have hit them - if you’re protecting them they will stay with you.
Document your injuries.
i wish you all the best - you will find that people will care and try to support you x

He gets arrested. His problem.
He gets convicted. His problem.
He loses his job. His problem.
He loses the house. There will be other places to live.

You and your children are not safe in the same house with this man. Do not wait - you are
all in danger right now. You need your injuries to be treated and documented as well.

He could take your life. In fact if he can do this, he's likely to kill you next time. Then your kids lives are truly ruined.

100% agree. He didn’t lose his temper - he made a choice. I bet he doesn’t smash his bosses’ faces into stone floors.

@Helpmetalktomeplease

There IS life after reporting him. It may not be the life you have had, but is that life really worth the way he treats you?

A house is just bricks and sticks and yours is an unhappy one, one that you live in in fear. You can find another place to live, in safety and in peace.

Call your family or a friend. Call the police. Abuse always escalates. In order to protect your children you MUST protect yourself first. Abusive men kill. Don't be a statistic.

Please, please take photos of your injuries. Email them to yourself or to a
safe person.

Please please get away from and get rid of this beast because next time (and I guarantee there will be a next time) you may not be so lucky.

I've taken photos, and messaged womens aid, everytime I go to ring 999 I freeze I can't seem to take that last step, I know there's no coming back from it then I'm such a coward

Not that’d be much better if he was but he’s not even remorseful for what he’s done

if helps dm your name dress-i call report for you.or email the 111 thing they will get back to yu
YOU arent doing this..or any of the what ifs worries. Please. Make call-report-asap.
Its vital

Everyone would know he is violent and unsuited to his profession.

All of those things are going to be lost anyway when he puts you in hospital or kills you. Except your kids won’t have you either while their father is arrested….

you have to go, none of this is your shame.

Your children will only be taken off you if you stay with him
nobody should work for the police who punches women
next time he will do that to the kids and they could die or be permanently damaged and you will go to jail for allowing it
do not sit on sofa with him call police now

What do you want from this thread? Do you want someone to call them for you?