Sex after a long dry spell, with someone much older!

[LaBrasseria2024]

Hi everyone,

32 years old. Currently OLD. I had a very long period (a good chunk of my 20's) not dating/no relationship/no sex, due to chronic UTI 🥹☹️

The Last person I had sex with was the same age as me (24), I know, crazy it's been that long!

I am back dating, dating someone who is 49, and I do feel very nervous about the prospect of sex. He is very, very physically fit, great body, but I just wonder what sex with someone who is almost 50 is like?

Is it too big of an age gap? Do they need a longer recovery or is it much the same? Do all men that age suffer from ED? I have read in some reports it starts mid 40's.

Will they see me as awfully inexperienced / will that be off putting?

Any advice appreciated.

Hopeful bump 😀

I think he'll be delighted to be having sex with a younger woman!

Christ he will be panting to get his hands on some young firm flesh!! And no, my auld fella is in his 60s and still as bloody rampant as he ever was - crack on and enjoy it

No, all men that age (and older) do not suffer ED. Plenty of men in their 50s are good in bed, still enjoy regular sex and know what a woman enjoys. Go for it!

Oh and expect to be taken out and shown off a lot as well - I bet he is over the moon. Let us know how you get on (not necessarily the nitty gritty lol) just in general

stop overthinking it. age is just a number and if you like him and you really get on then thats really what matters at the end of the day.

He will be all over you 😉, enjoy it.

Same age gap as me and dh... certainly no stamina, ED or recovery time issues!

BTW if you are prone to UTIs/the thought of that possibly recurring is causing you any stress, then have a look into taking d-mannose before and after sex, it worked for me

Thanks for the replies! I have mentioned it to a few of my friends but they are same age, married to people the same age and think the age gap is 'creepy'

In terms of UTI's, sadly d mannose didn't work for me, I do get twice monthly antibiotic bladder installations now, which seems to have stopped 'acute' UTI's, (fingers crossed)

Sex will be fine I'm sure.

Look for a younger man if you want long term though.
When you are his age now, he will be heading for 70. At that point it is just ewww.
I speak as a women of 48. Age gaps seem fine when you are 32. Not so much when you are older yourself and with a pensioner.

Wow I wonder if there's a more ageist thread today ?
@Autumnblackberries it's not ewww.
If you're older , you generally have an older partner.
OP - he's not even 50 , bloody hell. My partner is older and certainly no issues 🙄

@Autumnblackberries - that is a point that friends of mine have made yes. As he would be closer in age to my parents than to me!

Thinking the same.

And all the assumptions toooooo!

@notatinydancer

@mrandmrsrobinson

I really fancy the guy! But i have just read a bit on ED over 40 etc, I think it's the fact I am closer in age to his daughter than to him, has made some of my friends go 'yuck'

exactly more judgemental questions about two consenting adults they dont know.

My 49 year old lover is amazing!

Do enjoy getting back into the game 😊.

Honestly, ignore the ED crap. Some men will suffer, some won't. It's the same generalisation as saying all women over 50 don't want sex anymore. It's crap. Some will, some won't. You've not even slept with him yet!

@mrandmrsrobinson @notatinydancer @PassingStranger
If you read what I posted. I said the sex will be fine.
The problem, and the ewww from my point of view is the age gap for the future. Of course if you are older your partner will be similarly aged, but 17 years!!!
At 32, a 17 year age gap probably seems ok.
From where I'm sitting at 48 I most definitely do not fancy 65 year olds. Ageist- if you say so. I'd rather be single.

That sounds ouchy...take it slow, have lube to hand and stop if needed, no point in risking it flaring up.

From where I'm sitting at 48 I most definitely do not fancy 65 year olds.

George Clooney, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Pierce Brosnan 🤤

....although I appreciate the average 65 year old may not quite look like a Hollywood superstar 😆

Wait til you’re 58 like me - men in their 70’s really hold no appeal whatsoever. Doesn’t stop them trying though 🤦‍♀️

Jesus Christ, are you okay??

"young firm flesh"?? OP is 34, not 16 and the guy is 49, not 80.

This thread makes some pretty gross reading tbh.

OP - when you are 49 I REALLY hope you look back on the fact you wrote this thread as if the guy is a hundred years old. You aren't some child bride to him FFS (despite what some posters seem to think).

He may need more recovery time. He will like be as competent in bed as a 35 year old is likely to be - some great, some shit.

Whatever happens, be comfortable with what you are happy/not happy doing. You sound quite naive for 34 (given the way you view someone a mere 15 years older lol) so don't build it up or catsastrophise.

@ItsNeverAMannequin - I'm 32 ( just turned 32) , not 34, perhaps read my first post properly 😝