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Original poster

Should I sent the paragraph to him?

326 replies

serenabar · 28/07/2024 21:02

I wrote a message on my notes for my ex. I wanna send it but at the same time im scared too.. this is the message:
im scared he will leave me on delivered, or that he will tell me he is with someone else now.. but at the same time i wanted him to know this..

You probably won’t open this, just like you didn’t open the yesterday one. But I am gonna say it anyway.. I never expected that we would disappear from each other’s worlds. I never expected you would be okay with that. I never expected you would not care what I have to say to you, I never expected you would ignore me like that.
But they say men are quite simple.. “the way a man treats you is exactly how he feels about you. If he wants to talk to you, he will reach out. If he wants to see you, he will make plans with you. And if he acts like he doesn't care, then he doesn't care.”
Yes, looks like you stopped caring. I was there when you needed me, I answered all your questions and when I mentioned I was hurt too - you disappeared. Yes, you showed me once again my feelings are not valid. I am just someone from now another universe for you. You seem like you are doing just fine, like you are forgetting all about me. I wish it was that easy for me too. But then again.. this new you is not the man I fall inlove with. He would never do anything like that, he wouldn’t just delete me from his life. And that man is gone. He no longer exists and I gotta acept that. Its a new you that I don’t recognize, I just don’t know him. It hurts now but the sun will rise again.
No one can take away the person who you were when we were in love.
Not even you. That person can stay in my heart for as long as I decide.
I think he loved me.
Even when you hurt me multiple times, I still didn’t leave. I won the I love you more.
You put me in enough breakups for a lifetime. And I still wouldn’t walk away from you. Cause not for once I looked at another guy, not for once I accepted any follow request. Cause for me that will be offensive thing for my man. I’m pure and I’m loyal. When I love - I love hard. And i know cause when you want something badly you just don’t give up. Everything can be sorted. Absolutely everything. Of course if it’s wanted.
I guess I got my closure too.
No one is going to want something and let it slip away. That's not how the human heart works.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Clueless2024 · 28/07/2024 21:04

Don't.

As hard as it is, no contact is the only way. If you must, write him a letter then burn it

MzHz · 28/07/2024 21:04

No

Don’t send it.

you’ll kick yourself one day for doing so. You’ll die of mortal cringe

1441x · 28/07/2024 21:07

Absolutely do not send!

Given you also messaged him yesterday and he didn't open I wouldn't even waste the time typing out any more messages.
If it makes you feel better to let it all out keep them in your notes, or burn the letter method.

You will regret sending it and it doesn't seem like any good would come from it anyway

houseonthehill · 28/07/2024 21:08

Yeah, don’t. My Ex went through a period of sending texts, and a couple of letters, like that after we split up. I felt embarrassed/sorry for her and used to delete them/bin them unread.

Knackeredmommy · 28/07/2024 21:08

Please don't, I know it's hard but you're only hurting yourself.

MzHz · 28/07/2024 21:10

Even when you hurt me multiple times, I still didn’t leave. I won the I love you more.

You don’t allow people to hurt you multiple times

it breeds contempt - which is clearly what he felt for you in the end

he probably love bombed you, toyed with you while you shredded your self esteem in front of him, then the classic narc discard

the person you thought he was never existed, it was a mask and you were taken in by it.

turn the page, shut the book, burn it actually.

NEVER ALLOW SOMEONE TO TREAT YOU LIKE THIS! He should have cherished you, but he didn’t and you kept hanging on in there for him.

Alfonsoo · 28/07/2024 21:10

serenabar · 28/07/2024 21:02

I wrote a message on my notes for my ex. I wanna send it but at the same time im scared too.. this is the message:
im scared he will leave me on delivered, or that he will tell me he is with someone else now.. but at the same time i wanted him to know this..

You probably won’t open this, just like you didn’t open the yesterday one. But I am gonna say it anyway.. I never expected that we would disappear from each other’s worlds. I never expected you would be okay with that. I never expected you would not care what I have to say to you, I never expected you would ignore me like that.
But they say men are quite simple.. “the way a man treats you is exactly how he feels about you. If he wants to talk to you, he will reach out. If he wants to see you, he will make plans with you. And if he acts like he doesn't care, then he doesn't care.”
Yes, looks like you stopped caring. I was there when you needed me, I answered all your questions and when I mentioned I was hurt too - you disappeared. Yes, you showed me once again my feelings are not valid. I am just someone from now another universe for you. You seem like you are doing just fine, like you are forgetting all about me. I wish it was that easy for me too. But then again.. this new you is not the man I fall inlove with. He would never do anything like that, he wouldn’t just delete me from his life. And that man is gone. He no longer exists and I gotta acept that. Its a new you that I don’t recognize, I just don’t know him. It hurts now but the sun will rise again.
No one can take away the person who you were when we were in love.
Not even you. That person can stay in my heart for as long as I decide.
I think he loved me.
Even when you hurt me multiple times, I still didn’t leave. I won the I love you more.
You put me in enough breakups for a lifetime. And I still wouldn’t walk away from you. Cause not for once I looked at another guy, not for once I accepted any follow request. Cause for me that will be offensive thing for my man. I’m pure and I’m loyal. When I love - I love hard. And i know cause when you want something badly you just don’t give up. Everything can be sorted. Absolutely everything. Of course if it’s wanted.
I guess I got my closure too.
No one is going to want something and let it slip away. That's not how the human heart works.

DO NOT SEND THIS PILE OF CLICHE

WhatNext01 · 28/07/2024 21:11

No don’t send it. I think you should delete it in case you are tempted.

Alfonsoo · 28/07/2024 21:11

To be honest, the whole thing is just cringe and like it’s written from a second rate romantic novel

ZekeZeke · 28/07/2024 21:11

Jesus don't send that!
Don't send any message at all.

Timeisnevertimeatall · 28/07/2024 21:11

Oh god no. Gather up your dignity, delete the message and do not send it.

Original poster
serenabar · 28/07/2024 21:12

Thank you all. 🫣🥲😩🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

OP posts:
ZekeZeke · 28/07/2024 21:12

That's not a paragraph, it's a novel!

SerenityNowInsanityLater · 28/07/2024 21:13

Silence is golden.

Write. Journal. By all means, release your pain through words. But don’t give him your heart, power, or words ever again. They are your healers, your gift to yourself.

Silence is your strength. Show him that if you have to show him something 💐

JabbaTheBeachHut · 28/07/2024 21:14

Fuck me, do NOT send that.

As the Mumsnet saying goes, "People are entitled to end a relationship for any reason".

He doesn't want to know, so leave him be.

You've already sent a message yesterday that he didn't open, any more borders on harassment.

beenwhereyouare · 28/07/2024 21:14

serenabar · 28/07/2024 21:02

I wrote a message on my notes for my ex. I wanna send it but at the same time im scared too.. this is the message:
im scared he will leave me on delivered, or that he will tell me he is with someone else now.. but at the same time i wanted him to know this..

You probably won’t open this, just like you didn’t open the yesterday one. But I am gonna say it anyway.. I never expected that we would disappear from each other’s worlds. I never expected you would be okay with that. I never expected you would not care what I have to say to you, I never expected you would ignore me like that.
But they say men are quite simple.. “the way a man treats you is exactly how he feels about you. If he wants to talk to you, he will reach out. If he wants to see you, he will make plans with you. And if he acts like he doesn't care, then he doesn't care.”
Yes, looks like you stopped caring. I was there when you needed me, I answered all your questions and when I mentioned I was hurt too - you disappeared. Yes, you showed me once again my feelings are not valid. I am just someone from now another universe for you. You seem like you are doing just fine, like you are forgetting all about me. I wish it was that easy for me too. But then again.. this new you is not the man I fall inlove with. He would never do anything like that, he wouldn’t just delete me from his life. And that man is gone. He no longer exists and I gotta acept that. Its a new you that I don’t recognize, I just don’t know him. It hurts now but the sun will rise again.
No one can take away the person who you were when we were in love.
Not even you. That person can stay in my heart for as long as I decide.
I think he loved me.
Even when you hurt me multiple times, I still didn’t leave. I won the I love you more.
You put me in enough breakups for a lifetime. And I still wouldn’t walk away from you. Cause not for once I looked at another guy, not for once I accepted any follow request. Cause for me that will be offensive thing for my man. I’m pure and I’m loyal. When I love - I love hard. And i know cause when you want something badly you just don’t give up. Everything can be sorted. Absolutely everything. Of course if it’s wanted.
I guess I got my closure too.
No one is going to want something and let it slip away. That's not how the human heart works.

Please, please don't. Just don't.

alwaysmovingforwards · 28/07/2024 21:16

Invest your time moving forwards rather than writing notes looking backwards.

ClaraLaraBow · 28/07/2024 21:16

No don't. You think it's an excellent character assessment that will make him feel humbled but it just reads like ''you hurt me''. Which he probably already knows and sending it as a message will give him an excuse to label you CRAZY.

The best way to make him feel small is to give up on him because you now see that you only liked who you thought he was and that doesn't exist, so, meh, why message. You got turned off by his shabby behaviour. Repeat after me ''shabby behavior is not for me''

MargotMoon · 28/07/2024 21:18

If it helps, write it out by hand and then burn it. Then start thinking about why you let him keep treating you like shit.

Rendang · 28/07/2024 21:18

Dear God. No.

Runninghappy · 28/07/2024 21:19

I’m embarrassed for you. It’s time to move on and pick up your dignity

Dweetfidilove · 28/07/2024 21:21

Do not send that message, or any other.

Spend your time working on why you allowed one man to mistreat you multiple times.

BigPussyEnergy · 28/07/2024 21:21

Yeah he won’t read that and think twice about how much he hurt you - best case scenario he doesn’t read it, or does and shrugs/deletes it.

Worst case he laughs at it, thinks to himself or says to everyone he knows that you’re crazy/obsessed with him and that he had a lucky escape. He clearly had no respect for you while you were together and he’s not going to get any now.

If he hurt you over and over and you still stayed because you think loyalty trumps all, you need to realise this isn’t a healthy way to live. You should be equals, it isn’t about winning or who loves whom more. You don’t stay with someone who repeatedly disrespects you to prove your worth. That’s just letting him walk all over you.

Starseeking · 28/07/2024 21:22

I'm embarrassed on your behalf, why do you think so little of yourself???

Delete the message without sending it and erase him and his number from your life.

DoreenonTill8 · 28/07/2024 21:23

Bloody hell no, at best it's unhinged, at worst stalking level.
And Even when you hurt me multiple times, I still didn’t leave. I won the I love you more.
That's not something to be proud of. Do you expect him to come back saying 'NOOOOOO I love YOU MORE!!!'
I'd be scared if an ex sent that!