Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

DP has been a twat (Content Warning)

470 replies

Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 22:55

My DP who I have been with for 4 years has put his thumbs into my eyes when I asked him if hes been seeing his ex...who , by the way, has constantly been messaging him.

Last year I suspected something as he was acting weird and kind of mocking me after he had a drink.
So, I told him my gut was telling me that he had been messaging her...well he went fucking mental and punched me on the face causing me to have , what the hospital said was a deep zycoma (broken cheek bone)
I never reported him and just forgave him as at the time I just thought he was angry at my 'paranoia'
I had to have an operation to put my cheek bone back, basically plastic surgery! I also had to have a procedure where they go in from the eyebrow bow to fix the cheek bone.

Anyway, fast forward to this year and we have been really happy, but I still suspect the ec is in the picture and he's been sneaking meetings with her...

I am in no way a paranoid or jealous person. I'm not the sort of person who will ever just assume things. But my gut has been off, and anyone who has had the git feeling will know exactly what I mean.

Now here is the issue...my god would I just love to kick him out as everything is in my name , but I totally rely on his money, that is another thing he said "I wouldn't give you all my money if I was having an affair"

One more thing...
He has a tattoo on his back saying that she is the love of his life forever. When I ask him to remove it he lies and says it's just some random writing. So wont remove it. What are your views , please be nice as I am in bots after tonight and I appreciate everyone's advice.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 22:57

Sorry for typos

OP posts:
SeeSeeRider · 24/07/2024 23:00

Why are you still with this guy? He broke your face and dug his thumb in your eyes? Attacking the face is attacking the person as you see them. He has shown you how he feels about you. What good is his money when you are dead? For FUCK'S SAKE get some standards.

StSwithinsDay · 24/07/2024 23:02

What do you want people to say? Are you going to leave him? Was he reported to the police?

mirrorwritin · 24/07/2024 23:02

Leave him before he kills you. Sorry to be blunt.

PerfectTravelTote · 24/07/2024 23:02

It's only a matter of time until he kills you.

vodkaredbullgirl · 24/07/2024 23:03

He broke your face and you are still with him.

StSwithinsDay · 24/07/2024 23:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Mirrorcat · 24/07/2024 23:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

seaduck · 24/07/2024 23:04

His ex doesn't matter, his money doesn't matter, you need to leave before he kills you. You will be okay.

Thejackrussellsrule · 24/07/2024 23:04

What have I just read?

Read this back, imagine it was a friend or relative telling you this, what would you think?

Money isn't everything, especially when you're dead - get out if this relationship.

Gettingbysomehow · 24/07/2024 23:05

Chuck him out before he gouges your eyes out. It has happened before, it was a horrific story. Sorry but you will have to find your money elsewhere.

foothandmouth · 24/07/2024 23:05

He has not been a twat. A twat is forgetting to take out the bins

He's been a violent thug. Leave. Nothing is worth it. He will kill you

Starlia · 24/07/2024 23:06

He is more than a twat. He is a violent, abusive arsehole who is also likely to be cheating on you.
You are in a very dangerous relationship and you need to make plans to leave safely. He will NOT change.
Please reach out for help.

Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 23:08

I know and thankyou for all your replies. When my cheating ex left me I had a job as I had to pay the Bills, but this one told me I would never have to work again. And he would support me , which he has done, but I'm now thinking hes given me everything money wise so he can carry on with the 'love of his life's who is married by the way.

OP posts:
AutumnFroglets · 24/07/2024 23:09

but I totally rely on his money,

Why? Go on the benefits calculator and see what you are entitled to. Are you renting or owning, and whose names are on the rental/mortgage?

Get out before he kills you.

Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 23:10

I honestly thought he was going to kill me tonight.
Do cheating men get violent when confronted? He was so vile

OP posts:
SamW98 · 24/07/2024 23:10

You forgave a man who punched you in the face and broke your cheekbone? If that’s not the biggest red flag and a sign to get out NOW I’m not sure what is.

To put it bluntly, he’s an abusive cunt. Kick him out before he hurts you even more - or worse

StSwithinsDay · 24/07/2024 23:11

Have you contacted the police?

Meepmeepthebeepbeep · 24/07/2024 23:11

He’s an abuser nothing to do with cheating men, OP there’s probably more that’s happened that your not telling us
please for your safety kick him out, go on entitled to and see what benefits you can claim and start applying for jobs.

Ivehearditbothways · 24/07/2024 23:13

Get therapy. Get therapy now.

I’m speechless. What do you want people to do for you when you stayed with a violent thug who broke your cheek bone… I just can’t anymore with this forum.

mirrorwritin · 24/07/2024 23:13

Is there somewhere safe you can go tonight eg a friend? Ring women’s aid in the morning.

Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 23:13

Thank you all for replying, I just need a kick up the arse.
He is so charming in other ways, he will be all apologetic in the morning but I've had a fucking gut full.

He also said other stuff to me , but if I put it here it would honestly sound unbelievable.

OP posts:
IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 24/07/2024 23:14

Please get rid of him. You need to keep safe. You will be better off without him.

He's broke your face, you thought he was going to kill you, no amount of money will matter if you're dead. If you won't be able to afford to live without him you will probably be able to get some help with benefits etc.

Ring the police and report him. He's a cock and deserves nothing.

TheFormidableMrsC · 24/07/2024 23:14

You have to call the police and have him removed NOW. He will kill you. Listen to what people are saying to you.

Mindyourownbusinessmadam · 24/07/2024 23:15

I tried to contact my sister but no reply and I don't want my adult kids to know as they bloody adore him

OP posts: