DP has been a twat (Content Warning)

[Mindyourownbusinessmadam]

My DP who I have been with for 4 years has put his thumbs into my eyes when I asked him if hes been seeing his ex...who , by the way, has constantly been messaging him.

Last year I suspected something as he was acting weird and kind of mocking me after he had a drink.
So, I told him my gut was telling me that he had been messaging her...well he went fucking mental and punched me on the face causing me to have , what the hospital said was a deep zycoma (broken cheek bone)
I never reported him and just forgave him as at the time I just thought he was angry at my 'paranoia'
I had to have an operation to put my cheek bone back, basically plastic surgery! I also had to have a procedure where they go in from the eyebrow bow to fix the cheek bone.

Anyway, fast forward to this year and we have been really happy, but I still suspect the ec is in the picture and he's been sneaking meetings with her...

I am in no way a paranoid or jealous person. I'm not the sort of person who will ever just assume things. But my gut has been off, and anyone who has had the git feeling will know exactly what I mean.

Now here is the issue...my god would I just love to kick him out as everything is in my name , but I totally rely on his money, that is another thing he said "I wouldn't give you all my money if I was having an affair"

One more thing...
He has a tattoo on his back saying that she is the love of his life forever. When I ask him to remove it he lies and says it's just some random writing. So wont remove it. What are your views , please be nice as I am in bots after tonight and I appreciate everyone's advice.

This is a classic move by an abuser. Total financial control traps you further and allows him to treat you as badly as he wants.
how long since you’ve had a job?

Of course he’s charming at times. It’s the abusive cunts script. Throw a few crumbs of reasonable behaviour to fuck with your head and reel you back in then back to the abuse after a few days.

Can I still contact the police when it happened nearly a year ago?

Why are you still with the man who punched you in the face and broke your cheekbone? He will hurt you again and again OP and it will get worse. You need to leave him. No other advice - just leave.

Yes you can and contact them about what happened tonight when he tried to gauge your eyes out.

Do your children know he hits you?

He’s given you everything so you are dependant on him.

Please speak to WomensAid. They’ll know how to help you leave safely and get on your feet.

My heart is screaming at you to leave. Protect yourself 🌷

Please stop worrying about whether he's still seeing or contacting his ex, as you seem to be more fixated on that, than the fact this guy is going to do you some serious damage, or even kill you sooner or later.

Change your priorities and worry about YOU, not HER and, if you feel safe to do so, contact the police or WA and tell them what he's done to you. Please!

Yes and you can mention all the other stuff too, including you thinking he was going to kill you tonight. If you went to hospital about your cheek, there will be some record of it too. You deserve to be safe and happy.

To answer some questions, I do some jobs , but not to financially support me. I took a job when we first met but he told me to tell them on the day I was supposed to start to bin it off
He's said some awful things tonight in his pissed up state. That's why I am asking for advice as it's been going on too long now. And I thank you all, I cant sleep and am so gutted its come to this

What will your children think when he kills you????

He's tried to gouge your eyes out tonight! Of course you can call them and tell them that the jaw injury was him too. He needs to be arrested and removed! Even your thread title minimises it, he's not been a "twat", he's been a violent abusive arsehole. Time to do something about it surely? What will your adult children say when they have to identify your body?

He's abusive. You really need to get rid of him.

imagine worrying about whether your partner is cheating .... when hes broken your cheekbone 😂Like cheatings the least of your worries .....

I would have Such ick if I was with a man that resorted to violence.

Also , my kids don't know. They think he's amazing , as he always acts it in front of everyone

being a twat is a massive understatement.

i can’t believe how desperate people are to put up with nonsense like this just so they aren’t alone.

this is one of the reasons I’m single, not putting up with this type of shit

Well tell them the truth - how do they think you broke your cheekbone?

He’s just tried to gauge your eyes out, call and report that? Change your locks and never speak to him again.

What does everyone think happened to your face last year then? The surgery?

About the cheekbone injury, I told them all that I fell out of the hot tub , i also told the hospital that too.

Agree. I’m currently single and I’d rather be that way for the rest of my life than tolerate the shit many on here do just for the sake of dick.

Every time I think the bar can’t get any lower along comes the next thread to make my jaw drop in what women will accept

Dead women don’t need money. They don’t need a roof over their head, they don’t need food or water or clothing. They don’t need to pay for the electric, they have no need for entertainment, they don’t buy gifts for family, they don’t go on vacay. They don’t have school fees, they don’t buy sweets or crisps, they don’t have social lives, they don’t tithe, they don’t own cars, they don’t ride the bus or train and they don’t ride a bike.
They don’t do anything, they don’t go anywhere.
Because they’re dead

Isn’t it about time you told your kids what he is really like?

And I imagine the only reason he's not abused them is because they're too old to do so. Christ on a bike, they need to be told what he's done to you.

Contact the police tonight about tonight's violence. Start with that, then you can mention last year's assault on you. But honestly, tonight is more than enough to get the ball rolling.

You can do this. Make that call