What makes people attractive and others not?

[Beanscene]

Am talking about average looking people here not stunning models. I always hear women complaining about unwanted attention sexually and people who have affairs and have to choose between affair partners and OH. People who have admirers at work etc etc....it seems like your average person gets a lot of sexual attention etc etc. Just to be clear here am not looking as am married (and now old🤣)....but have literally never ever had any attention in my life especially the kind of attention other women talk about. No one has ever given me their number, asked me out, complimented me....wolf whistled etc etc.....i know this is unwanted attention. but I hear about it so often I wonder why I've never received it. I would say am short, thin, not curvy (which prob has a lot to do with it) but facially am not Quasimodo. And have never ever apart from DH had a whiff of attention.

No it's good to hear different ways of thinking. Maybe I'm the odd one actually 😂
But someone can be not physically that appealing to most, but if the chemistry is there, humour, depth, way they make me feel.. then they are the best looking person to me. And then the few times I've been hurt by them and I've seen sides to them that give me the ick, they become ugly.

@durundundun just because you dont have a degree doesnt mean your uneducated, some of the most thickest people I know have degree's (and I have a degree in engineering btw) and getting a degree aint even that difficult.

I consider myself as career driven but career driven men aint into career driven women, most men dont give a flying fuck about your degree or how much money you make. As long as my GF enjoys her job then I dont care about how much money she makes.

Also as for inexperienced what man wants a woman who has slept around? Go ask 100 men if they prefer a woman who was a virgin/lower number of sexual partners or a girl who has slept around, id say 95 of those men would prefer the virgin/inexperienced woman.

Imagine actually loving some woman who has slept around? If those other men didnt want to love you, take you out on dates and spend money on you then why should I?

I'm assuming English is your second language as your grammar is appalling.
Your and you're are not interchangeable.
'Most thickest'. The irony
I'm fascinated at your assumption that you know what all men want.
Intelligent people generally don't make such obviously inane statements.

Throughout my teenage years, 20s and 30s I was tall and slim. And quite shy at least up to my thirties. People mistook that for arrogance and I realised years later that I was out of many men’s league, or at least they thought so. I moved to a different region at uni and men started to chat me up more. In my thirties my job made me put myself out there and get out of my comfort zone and start communicate more with people. I am mid forties now, overweight for the last few years and I am getting more attention than ever.
I am smiling a lot more and come across as more approachable due to my job. And I come across as very confident.

But didn't she learn some exceptional techniques when travelling in the far East, or is that all rumours.

Def incel vibes.....do you think their perfect girlfriend is the blow up variety!?

I've never gotten any real attention either. I figure it's my face.....or maybe my ace vibes are shining through.
Although I have been catcalled, groped, sent pornographic letters, flashed and a couple of summers ago a guy stopped me in his car ostensibly to ask for directions but actually to show me his knob (I'm a nurse so nothing I haven't seen countless times before!).

These incels all sound the same, it’s like they copy and paste from the same script.
We want our women slim and fit, she has to give us as many kids as we want , who cares about women’s achievements beyond having kids? blah blah and oh - women who marry after a certain age are “ran through” and end up “alone and desperate” and end up “single mothers ” (never mind that it’s these men who are creating the single mothers ) blah blah

Good grief

But they did and they had a much better understanding of grammar and punctuation than some small minded bigot who needs to send the dark ages their views back.

Aint is not even a word and I would have thought someone with an engineering degree would know that!

I've been pondering this and I've realised I have a kind of 'reactive' response to finding some men attractive. Neither of the two men I've had the most meaningful relationships with - including the man who is now my husband - are conventionally attractive, and with both I started out thinking we'd just be friends as I didn't really fancy them. Then at some point after I'd got to know them and found them to be intelligent, funny, kind men with whom I clicked mentally and emotionally, something flipped and I suddenly had a gut-punching physical attraction to them (this didn't happen with both men simultaneously btw 😄but the process was the same both times).

I disagree it can often accidentally come across as arrogance so there’s a very fine line

I had one of these in my early twenties - he was good looking with a good physique, also couldn’t walk past a shop window or mirror without admiring himself, tiresome.
Same
limited conversation, cars and girls, who fancied him and beer - no humour whatsoever
good for you !

degree’s

@SoundTheSirens Same, definitely didn't feel anything physical at first with the people I've been involved with, and had the longest lasting connections with.
Maybe also something to do with them being more attracted so I never felt insecure.
Maybe why we see better looking women with less attractive men

Men who I've been initially physically attracted to have never worked out as more than a physical thing. Or I just avoid them all together as assume they'll just make me insecure or be a sleaze etc.
never found that perfect combo of initial attraction and personality match, maybe people expect too much when dating.

I honestly think being a deep person makes people attracted to people. People like interesting people who can actually hold a conversation and ask questions and hold a different view (not just monologue about themselves) - you become attached to people in this way and want to know more.

my comment for @Gingerlad12345 was meant to include an ironic eyeroll

Nothing wrong with not wanting a woman who has been ran through,is fat and shit in the kitchen.Lots of salty women on here!

Nothing wrong with trying not to be a cunt to people for no reason too 🤷🏻‍♀️
This entry level misogyny is really boring, hun.

Attractive
Treats and respects his family and animals
Likes reading books
Kind of attentive of what I like and feel

No indeed. If you ever needed to make a shortlist out of your zero options, you could use that as your criteria!