Blocked after an intimate video call and now I'm panicking

[Worriedashell84]

So I got talking to a foreign guy on a dating site 2 weeks ago, a mixture of video calls and phone calls. There was never anything sexual the whole 2 weeks and in fact we were talking about lots of different things, like music , the meaning of life etc. He never once tried to get me to take my top off or anything the whole time. We were chatting most days as well.
However in the last video call, a couple of nights ago, things turned sexual. The app we used is end to end encrypted however in hindsight I'm now panicking that he video recorded it or has screenshotted stuff, especially now that he has blocked me.
I never took my bra or pants off , but I did show him my breasts a bit with my bra on ( I tried not to show my face in that but I can't be sure) and I did show my hand touching underneath my underwear a bit but obviously my face isn't in it.

At most there might be a picture of me with my bra on but showing my breasts and I also didn't show them both at the one time, if he has screenshotted that part.
I should say he was very aroused during the call and actually came during it. He also showed himself down there fully erect and coming. (Sorry if tmi, just trying to get all context in)
If it's a case where he realizes he just didn't fancy me and has blocked me, then fine, I can deal with that.
But if he has screenshotted stuff or recorded anything then yes I would be a bit worried.
So my question is am I jumping to conclusions and panicking needlessly? Would you be worried about this?

I only realized I was blocked today which was 2 days after the call. I can't believe how stupid I've been, I actually liked the guy.
I think the fact that he never tried to make things sexual for the whole 2 weeks made me trust him and actually it was sort of me who initiated it in the last call as I really fancied him. He also works in IT which makes me worry more as he is IT savvy.
I am never ever doing an intimate video call with anyone ever again.

So should I just forget about this awful judgement call and vow to never do anything like this again or should I actually be worried?
I think the fact that he has blocked me has made me think he has done or is doing something sinister.
Sorry for the ramble,, I'm just actually panicking this morning

He's probably married, and probably got caught, quite literally.

Come to London. Hang out on Edgware Road,plenty men in RL who match your preference. Actual RL guys not online scammers who fortuitously have sick dad In hospital

No, you're a bunch of prudish nuns for being so nasty about her having a mild cam sex session with a guy she fancied a lot and was chatting to steadily for a couple of weeks.

The slut shaming was vitriolic.

I reported a post because it was so bad and I rarely do that. Some other posters were similarly disgusted.

It became a superior, nasty, self righteous, misogynistic pile on.

But don't worry, anyone who thinks that is a "sock puppet".

Op appears to have taken on board about the dodginess of the hospital photo etc. It's horse flogging at this point.

You were panicking that this guy with no provenance other than being found on a dodgy internet dating site 2 weeks ago, who you've never met, was likely to post intimate pictures of you online, having blocked you.

Nothing has changed. You still know less than zero about him, but hey, it's OK because his father was coincidentally sick unto death. Funny that.

Think about it OP and at least try to keep a bit safer, because you may not be old, overweight, in fact you could be a vision of loveliness, but it doesn't mean he's straight up, because all the indications are that he isn't.

I haven't read all the replies, so I apologise if someone's already mentioned it...

Some men like to share nudes/videos on forums (can't remember the forum names) from women they chat to online. They'll name you and give a location too.

My advice would be to never ever share photos and videos that you wouldn't be happy being made public.

absolutely correct. There are forums were men sell or share women intimate photos plus their demographics

Vultures are out tonight...and I don't mean scamboy.

Whether he's a scammer or not, I had a close friend fall in love with a N African guy online, she ended up marrying him and bringing him here, he wasn't a financial scammer but pretty much 2 years to the day after theh got married and he could get a visa independently he was off like a shot.

A lot of men in those countries are just desperate to have the chance to live here.

2 years to the day after theh got married and he could get a visa independently he was off like a shot

It should be removed if they divorce... Our immigration/naturalization laws are too soft.

In Japan they kick them out within 6 months of a divorce.

I'm not sure what happens if there are kids.

I haven’t slut shamed anyone. I’ve given my opinion based on 20+ years working in financial crime and fraud prevention that this is a scam and the man she’s talking to doesn’t exist.
Its not ‘slut shaming’ to warn someone to not have online sex worn someone they’ve never met as in so many cases now it’s AI and putting yourself at risk of very negative, far reaching consequences. I’ve dealt with 100’s of people who have fallen for online scammers and the fallout is horrendous

And no I don’t think she has taken it seriously onboard tbh. She’s treating it like a huge joke but that’s her call. She can’t say she hasn’t been warned. The guy she was so attracted to probably isn’t real - that’s what she needs to be more aware of going forward.

You mean that they are all the same right? A guy in Morocco must think like the Taliban?

What’s you actual point? Allow scams because someone is desperate to have the chance to live here So what of they are? Doesn’t mean Women make them self available to the desperate men to fulfil their wish

Your friend fell for a romance scam even if he wasn’t stealing her money.

And she might not have handed over cash but I bet him moving into her home etc cost her money

Honestly just try to forget about it, porn sites are that saturated if he did screenshot that the chances of anyone you know seeing a bra shot are slim. More worrying would be blackmail but even then the pictures would be pretty tame

I was not referring to your other posts, just the one I directly quoted.

In which you said "we" are all prudish nuns for warning her.

Other women were not warning her (or only warning her) . ..they were being extremely critical & derogatory about the cam "sex".

They were called nuns for that.

You were implying they were called nuns for warning her about the possible scamming etc.

They weren't.

I thought this thread was very interesting. I have read through the entire lot. I think the take home point is that with online stuff, we are all susceptible, no matter how educated, streetwise and financially savvy we are, particularly if we are lonely and relatively isolated (this can happen inside and outside existing relationships).

I would have said “me, never!” but the posts from those working with scams was quite interesting in terms of describing the painstaking time taken sometimes over years and the detail that goes into grooming someone to the point as to transform their brain into seeking the highs of connection and the falseness of the emotional bond that has been formed. It’s as if they have become drug addicts without knowing it and that could easily happen to me, no matter how clever I think I am.
And with AI now, the potential for these offshore scammers is greater.
My highly sceptical, very financially savvy mother fell for the “Hi mum” scam and it was because the scam successfully hooked her into the part of the brain that needs to protect your children, that part makes lots of mistakes.

So it has been an illuminating thread.

I hope you haven't shared any of your social media profiles with him op

People in Nigeria have been extradited to the US to stand trial for a blackmail scam that resulted in a young man killing himself.

If he did try any blackmail angle, I think I'd be making it clear to him that it's a crime in the UK and is he happy to trust that the UK and Morocco have no arrangements that would result in his prosecution etc.

Sounds more like he might have been going for the "help out with xyz expenses" game though.

@WalkingaroundJardine

Doing my job I have told my parents so many times never to give any information to cold callers etc without calling me first and yet my dad was still taken in by a company claiming to be solicitors. He has a minor knock in his car(his fault) and they called to say the other party was suing him for dangerous driving and he would be prosecuted if he didn’t pay an out of court settlement. He believed them and was scared of being sued so started giving his card details - it’s only that my mum asked what he was doing and made him hang up. They called back repeatedly and even me telling him it was a scam did t convince him. He was terrified. After a few days I told him to let me speak to them and the minute I started asking questions they hung up and never called again.

But I’m sure many others have fallen for it and lost money

the painstaking time taken sometimes over years and the detail that goes into grooming someone to the point as to transform their brain into seeking the highs of connection and the falseness of the emotional bond that has been formed.

I've gone through a phase of watching catfish romance scam videos and they all tend to do the same thing, because it's rather obvious and it works; they keep the contact very regular if possible and insert themselves into every phase of the day ....good morning texts, good night texts, texts at meal times etc. The person becomes used to a level of attention and interest, of "companionship", that is quite addictive, as you say.

I suppose a lot of it is how people naturally act when they form a relationship/start falling in "love" ..the same chemical processes etc.

I do think it sounds like this guy love bombed and mirrored the op.

All I can say is, TF I am old!!!!

I have to say it’s really compelling to hear from someone with 20+ yrs experience in financial crime and fraud

That is the very person I’d be listening to if I were anxious about an online scam. Someone who has the knowledge and experience

Prudish nun? Well thank you I like to think I do have a style conducive with convents and chaste nuns. It’s the itchy cardigans and monobrow

It doesn’t necessarily sound ideal but I know 2 people who had very genuine relationships with Morrocan men they met online. One split because neither of them wanted to move, the other they got married and he came to UK. His family are Muslim but he’s not they have a normal British life been married 5+ years with a child. Bur if you think you’ll just gave this as someone online thing I think that’s stupid and a waste of time, you risk falling for him and you’re undermining the chance of meeting someone in real life

@Xenoi24
You're right I jumped the gun and replies based on the first few posts. I feel OP and any other woman doing similar online need to watch the tinder swindler - he's virtually identical to the beginning of this online relationships.

@WhatWhereWho 25% of moroccans consider honour killing more acceptable than homosexuality. Even the most forward thinking moroccan is probably not going to be hardwired to respect a British western single mother actively looking to date.
It's not worth it.

Worriedashell
No slut shaming from me just amazed at the stupidity of your actions.