Blocked after an intimate video call and now I'm panicking

[Worriedashell84]

So I got talking to a foreign guy on a dating site 2 weeks ago, a mixture of video calls and phone calls. There was never anything sexual the whole 2 weeks and in fact we were talking about lots of different things, like music , the meaning of life etc. He never once tried to get me to take my top off or anything the whole time. We were chatting most days as well.
However in the last video call, a couple of nights ago, things turned sexual. The app we used is end to end encrypted however in hindsight I'm now panicking that he video recorded it or has screenshotted stuff, especially now that he has blocked me.
I never took my bra or pants off , but I did show him my breasts a bit with my bra on ( I tried not to show my face in that but I can't be sure) and I did show my hand touching underneath my underwear a bit but obviously my face isn't in it.

At most there might be a picture of me with my bra on but showing my breasts and I also didn't show them both at the one time, if he has screenshotted that part.
I should say he was very aroused during the call and actually came during it. He also showed himself down there fully erect and coming. (Sorry if tmi, just trying to get all context in)
If it's a case where he realizes he just didn't fancy me and has blocked me, then fine, I can deal with that.
But if he has screenshotted stuff or recorded anything then yes I would be a bit worried.
So my question is am I jumping to conclusions and panicking needlessly? Would you be worried about this?

I only realized I was blocked today which was 2 days after the call. I can't believe how stupid I've been, I actually liked the guy.
I think the fact that he never tried to make things sexual for the whole 2 weeks made me trust him and actually it was sort of me who initiated it in the last call as I really fancied him. He also works in IT which makes me worry more as he is IT savvy.
I am never ever doing an intimate video call with anyone ever again.

So should I just forget about this awful judgement call and vow to never do anything like this again or should I actually be worried?
I think the fact that he has blocked me has made me think he has done or is doing something sinister.
Sorry for the ramble,, I'm just actually panicking this morning

I agree lots of the replies here advising the OP to have a self respect etc are horrible. Anything goes between two consenting adults. It is risky but then again so are ONS.

However, I think you're being groomed for a scam OP. It's a script and I think you got your first sense of that this morning. Trust your initial instincts this morning and let the relationship drop.

What was in it for you then?

Are you really asking her what was in it for her ..... re. a very handsome man who's exactly her type (and whom she liked from chatting for a fortnight) masturbating for her, while she was also masturbating??

Lol

This is like some parallel universe where a bunch of nuns have invaded MN.

By all means have online sex with anyone you chose but meet them in real life first otherwise you’re leaving you self open

You could have been having sex with ChatGPT for all you know 😁

@Xenoi24 love it! You hit the nail on the head!
And yes that's what I got out of it, bar the worrying about it earlier of course.
Really does feel like a bunch of nuns have invaded the thread 😂😂

Absolutely. I’ve seen some of these AI videos where the victims are 💯 convinced they’re talking to the person in the photos and they are very very well done.

how dare a 40 year old woman think she could attract a 28 year old man

It has been known for a 28 year old man to be attracted to a 40 year old woman, but it's unusual.

It's not unusual ffs

OP, I would honestly have a long think about your boundaries and how you want to get your sexual kicks. There just doesn't seem to an obvious happy ending to a single.mum of a young child flashing her bits for a man in a other country to get off on camera. Is this really what you want? It isn't going to go anywhere and you are running the risk of having your image shared all over the place. Focus on your real world, with real people. Best of luck, I hope you can find a.more authentic relationship closer to home.

Don’t do this. I’m not sure it’s legal and it’s obviously not morally OK to screenshot intimate video calls without the consent of the other person.

If you feel you need an insurance policy, for whatever reason, then you shouldn’t be having an intimate video call with that person.

It's not remotely unusual.

It is unusual, however, for them to want an ltr.

Re him claiming to be an atheist Muslim (lol); I suppose one way of proving that he is non practising is to insist on having an alcoholic drink during the video call, especially during Ramadan.

Given I've seen Muslims in Dubai leave their beers with a coaster on top of them in the hotel bar while they went to prayer (and pal around with Kim Kardashian looking ladies who are not their wives) ..... I think we can take what Muslims are supposed to do, and what some Muslims actually do, with a big pinch of salt.

For some, there's a big difference between what they pretend to their parents/families and what they actually believe and do.

The Op is forgetting WHY she started this thread in the first place...

'in hindsight I'm now panicking that he video recorded it or has screenshotted stuff,'
' But if he has screenshotted stuff or recorded anything then yes I would be a bit worried.'

all because she mistakenly thought he had blocked her

as he hasn't
and they have since even spoken on the phone

I guess ' normal service ' can and will resume

I just wonder if the Op can afford the spousal visa requirements for when he comes to the U.K...

I never took my bra or pants off , but I did show him my breasts a bit with my bra on ( I tried not to show my face in that but I can't be sure) and I did show my hand touching underneath my underwear a bit but obviously my face isn't in it.

Really? You weren’t masturbating?

I won’t argue the semantics of this (but I notice you appear to agree with another post that says you were both masturbating) but whether you describe this as masturbating or not, whatever you were doing was clearly similar/equivalent to a man masturbating online with someone he’s met online.

It goes without saying that I mean male equivalent of what you were doing, since I’m hardly going to ask how you feel about a man stripping down to his bra

And either way you were watching the 28 year old masturbating /showing his genitals anyway so it’s all the same really. It’s disingenuous to split hairs over this.

And I didn’t say you were cheating or not.

TDLR I was basically asking if you were happy for the local man you’re seeing to be engaging in similar kind of online activities (whatever you choose to call then) as you have been engaging in with this man.

So…Are you?

Not perverted.

Stupid

But you're beginning to enjoy this a bit too much

It’s certainly not unusual for 28 year old morrocan men. 40, 50, 60. Not remotely unusual. One of th4 most common scams there is.

It's not 'consent' when you really don't know who it is you're communicating with

Sigh….

if this is real, and I have my doubts, you do know one of the biggest scams is getting to know you, your Facebook, your family, your friends etc and then threatening to send them your “intimate” sex videos if you don’t send them money regularly. They work in call centres, sometimes trafficked to do so.

You have been warned, we can all see it.

@Xenoi24 Dubai is fairly relaxed nowadays in rules compared to Morocco. If anyone in his neighbourhood had the slightest inkling he was an atheist his life would be turned miserable and he would be isolated. Especially in Rabat.

It's not remotely unusual.

Well I don't know of any such relationships. The Macrons spring to mind, but I don't know any personally.

but I notice you appear to agree with another post that says you were both masturbating

I presumed she was ...... From her saying something about her hand in underwear, maybe I was wrong in presuming that, of op has clarified she wasn't.

I believe she agreed with me pointing out what was in it for her .... Not necessarily my entire post and my presumption she was masturbating too.

MN is like Chinese whispers in text form.

If you continued with him OP, how would you see it progressing? This video call was pretty lame on your behalf, though he did much more. If you continued speaking with him then no doubt at some point he'd want you to reveal much more of your body, and maybe you'd feel comfortable doing so, as you'll have been speaking for many weeks/months by then. That could be the point at which he screenshots/records you, and has stuff to blackmail you with. The only way to stay safe is to not do anything intimate on video, or send explicit pictures, and if that's the way forward then it's only ever a friendship.

Did you actually read my post??

I said it's not remotely unusual for them to be attracted ..

But it is for them to want ltrs with 40 yr olds

Honestly @Worriedashell84 , just have fun. Other posters are largely well meaning, but you're not remotely taken advantage of in any way. The two of you - you and the guy - just continue to have fun and enjoy. Let's just say some of the posters above would love to be in your position 😝

I'm not trying to shame you. I think it's sad to see any woman, whatever her age, so desperate that she can put herself in a potentially dangerous or scary position. Someone else on the thread said this:

By all means have online sex with anyone you chose but meet them in real life first otherwise you’re leaving you self open

And someone else points out:
You could have been having sex with ChatGPT for all you know 😁

What's going on for you elsewhere in your life that you're prepared to settle for this empty and potentially risky set-up when a genuine relationship with a real person could be on the cards?