Is this a normal thing to do?

[Fofum]

Hello

My partner works from home since covid and has now invited a female friend to come over and work with him here in our spare bedroom officeI. We're south of London so plenty of spaces to work if it was needed elsewhere. Is this something other people would be comfortable with or is it not normal? I don't know if it's just me and I feel too silly to say it out loud. She has space in her house to work and they don't do the same job or work for the same company, he works in it and she does something with insurance so I'm at a loss as to the point

No.

I would find it a bit weird but maybe I'm insecure... he might just want the company but couldn't he go into the office for that?

Very very odd.

Crikey! Absolutely not. What did you say when he mentioned this?
Did he even ask if you minded?

Absolutely not.

Of course it’s not, regardless of the sex of the colleague. The fact they don’t actually work together makes it even less normal. Are you working from home?

Are you paying 50% of rent/utilities for it to be his office?

No, he didn't ask he just casually said it

Those saying no, why? I don't see the point in it myself

Because your home is not for randomers to use as a work space?

He sounds like a CF.

What do you mean?

Well its his home too so I can't be charging him to use it lol

I would not be ok with it.

weird, I would say no.

If he is working from home then obviously utility costs increase?🤷🏻‍♀️

If he has someone else working there too, then of course it will cause an increase in utilities.

To be honest, I'm less bothered about a slightly higher heating bill and more about him wanting her here. On one hand she's his friend so I shouldn't find it not normal but I can't see any other reason to do this other than to spend time with her?

That would be an absolute no from me! DP works at home and has had female colleagues round to work once or twice - that’s colleagues and when working on a specific project together with a deadline.

I would assume he fancies her and wants to have alone time with her.

Not sure if it's weird or not, but if they're friends why would wanting to spend time together be wrong?
Maybe he wants company when he works without paying for travel costs and prefers working from home. I used to study alongside my boy mates for company sometimes.

I think because if you're working your working. He doesn't ask me to come and sit looking at him while he works lol

What is making you all say no? If I can put it into words I'll know how to say something

That's mad! How would he feel if you asked one of your buddy's to come work in your bedroom all day. And that friend is as bad. If one of my male friends suggested l work alongside him all day while his wife was gone to work l would be very uncomfortable with that and think it very inappropriate.
Just no!!

I'm not at work at the moment full time, I'm doing bits in the evenings and at odd times so I'd be in the house too

I don't think he'd mind if I had someone here annoyingly but i do have lots of friends over just not to work. I think it's the what's the point having her here if they are both just working other than to spend time with her, is there one other than that?

The only reason why he wants a study buddy to come over and play at his house while they "work" is not a good one.

Well the glaringly obvious reason would be he wants to conduct an affair ( or begin one) in plain sight. Don’t think this is a ridiculous thought, it isn’t and I have seen it happen.

You are uncomfortable with it, that’s reason enough for it not to happen. Even if entirely innocent I’d not be happy with my partner’s friend or colleague ( male or female) in my house working x amount of hours every week. I couldn’t relax. Also is she planning to cover the financial costs involved.? Your internet, heating, kettle etc.

If your partner doesn’t consider your feelings in all this you do have a problem. In my opinion you already do.

Whilst I can understand you wanting to be armed with a solid argument, in a healthy and respectful relationship "that makes me uncomfortable" should be enough of a reason not to do something. If he pushes the issue and makes you out to be paranoid, then that in itself is an issue.

Has he said why she can't just work at her place? As you say, if the intent is to spend time together as friends, then surely outside of work hours would be better?

Going against the grain, wouldn't bother me.

Working from home can be isolating and it's easier bouncing off someone.