He only wants to get married after a drink

[squaresc]

DP has proposed a few times whilst drunk, but when he's sober he won't talk about it. I've gently broached the subject asking things like "are we still engaged" and "should we talk about this sober?" He just gets a bit stressed and the conversation tapers off.

He's asked my ring size before but no sign of a ring.

We've been together 5 years, in the process of buying a house and planning on TTC once we've moved.

He's almost 40, he (sober) had told me previously that he was planning on proposing at the end of last year. Why is it so hard?

🥳

Congratulations!!!

When are you moving😎

I still need to tell my partner. I felt I needed a 'get out plan' in place before I told him.

The completion needs to be 22 days after we exchange so next month would be the soonest.

Well I guess you have a while yet. Depends how you think he will react?

Her everything valuable and precious boxes up and safe in the boot of your car in case it gets nasty?

YAAAAAY

The whole of MN is behind you. Unfortunately we're those friends who don't help you move but show up for the housewarming.

Wow - well done, @squaresc!!!!

Congratulations! If you haven't told him yet and you're worried about how he will react I'd wait a bit to tell him until things are further along (e.g. post survey so you're sure you're going ahead). Good for you moving on with your life, I've seen so many threads on here of people feeling stuck and unable to ditch the guy and move on which is so sad. Well done you!

That’s great !

Fantastic news.

You deserve this. Wishing you all the best

Excellent! Keeping everything crossed for you OP. 🌹

Congratulations op onwards and upwards.

What's your flat like? What ch ages are you going to make of any to it?

Tell us about why you've chosen it.

Delighted for you @squaresc 👏🏻💐
Agree with other posters.
Say nothing till everything is ready to go.
What a fool he is !

It's a street over from my Mum's, two bed two bathroom.

It needs redecorating. Second bedroom will be an office/crafty room. I'm really looking forward to having a dedicated workspace rather than working from the end of my bed.

I've got some artwork to put in but I need furniture so I'm excited to furnish it!

Delighted for you.

Another young woman escaping an older selfish pig.

Well done you.

Near your mum and support.

How fantastic.

Have everything of value in the boot of your car.

Call the police at any hint of violence.

Don't listen to any pleadings or desperate offers of marriage.

He will hate losing childcare primarily.

You deserve so much better than this user loser.

Best update ever. So happy for you

Do you have anyone who can help when you leave?

New place sounds fab. I'm impressed you've managed to keep this all under the radar from him.

Do you have a list of all the things you need to organise like post redirection etc?

Brilliant news. Time to prioritise yourself. Congratulations

Yass queen

Such a lovely well deserved update.

You can get excited now.

It sounds perfect. And right by your mum!

It's all falling into place for you.

Just think, this Christmas or before you will be settled in a new space that's your own!

Well done op your a good example to people on here who might be scared to move on.

You've done it, your doing it and your happy.

Xxx

So happy for you. In a short time you will shake your head that you got involved with a man with children at age 20, and then put up with him acting as though marrying you, having a child with you, etc. was some sort of big favour, meanwhile letting you handle HIS parenting duties.

Enjoy decorating your flat, enjoy your precious youth and take everyone's suggestions re boundaries and not being a people pleaser. Better to be without a man than one like that.

Oh, and if you like that sort of thing, second-hand furniture is fabulous and can be spruced up with paint; I'm having fun lately experimenting with chalk paint, decoupage, etc.

Wise words.

Congratulations!! 🎊🎈🎉 onward and upward! Excited for you, and well done at moving your life forward in a hugely positive way!

God what a brilliant thread.

I admire your courage OP! Congratulations on your new flat, new life, freedom is yours!

Absolutely this.

I love before's and after's.

I have done a few things and the sense of achievement and having my Martha Stewart moment is just great.🙄😁

Particularly the quality of the workmanship that can be found in older furniture.

Such an exciting time, your first home.

Good luck OP. You deserve better than this. A lot of ladies on here have commented on the age gap. If he’d been a 40 year old good bloke with consistent life goals and didn’t take the kick or mess you around, I’d say that age isn’t an issue. The marriage talk while drunk is one I’m sadly familiar with. In my case, turns out that said person desperately wanted to get married but hadn’t told me the truth that they were up to their neck in debt, which is why it never happened. Either way, all the very best to you, and I’m sure you’ll meet someone who deserves you when you’re ready x

I told him this morning, I'll pack some bits up and take them to my sister's today. Solicitor says searches are due back next Friday.

I've said "I'll start looking" for somewhere to live, he doesn't need to know much. Just that I've found somewhere once I exchange.

I'll be glad to see the back of him, I really dislike the man now.