Here is the definition of blackmail you moron.
the action, treated as a criminal offence, of demanding payment or another benefit from someone in return for not revealing compromising or damaging information about them.
What posters are actually suggesting here is that the OP provides her shitty partner with a CHOICE.
He's saying: I won't marry you until we have a baby... probably.
She's saying: I want to get married before we have a baby. He changes the subject.
As a result of that, there is a stalemate. One that he KNOWS she will have to make a decision around soon because of oh..... just biology really.
The advice given is that she gives him the CHOICE. So she says "i'm happy TTC without marriage BUT if that happens and we have a baby, your name won't go on the birth certificate". He has the option then. He can say no (like he's been so keen on doing) or he can say ok.
This is not blackmail, it is a negotiation. The person who turned it into a negotiation suprise suprise is the man... because obviously OBVIOUSLY he has to have it his way. She's allowed to be the vessel for his child, but she's not allowed the title of "Wife" until she provides that child... maybe, probably, at some point.
The OP has the right to make her own requests, he doesn't have to accept them however (which we all know, because so far he fucking hasn't has he).
So please explain which bit of this is blackmail and why isn't it blackmail in reverse if he's refusing marriage before she pops one out for him?
I suppose that just because YOU are sat in a high and mighty happy situation with children out of wedlock, you think that everyone else should be cool with taht as well. It appears you have very little ability to consider that not everyone is ok with that the way you are, and not everyone agrees with your way of life - but if it works for you then great, but that isn't what OP wants, and we're helping her, not you, or her shitty partner who I would boot.
Frankly, from a purely economical point of view, I wouldn't bother marrying his sorry ass because I wouldn't want him having rights to my assets (namely my house). I'd protect that for all it was worth. I'd also refuse to add his name to the birth certificate and let him know of that before he dips his wick.... so he was fully informed that should a child result in his 2 minutes of effort to achieve a baby, its name and its parents would be listed as per MY wishes.
Agree with the poster who said piss off to the mens rights hole you came out of.