I messaged my ex boyfriend on his wedding day...he's gonna think I'm crazy isn't here

[pinkinmysky]

My ex is a narcissist or at least he has narcissistic traits.
He mentally /emotionally abused me and made me feel worthless.
We split 1 1/2 years ago and he didn't explain why he treated me bad,blamed me and then stopped replying to me.

I got upset last Saturday after finding out he was getting married
I messaged him on messenger (he has never blocked me,just ignored all my messages but read them all)
I said how can he just move on and never give me any explanation to why he did all the things he did
It was long message
He obviously read it and ignored it
Then changed his picture to him and her after getting married.

He's gonna think I'm a total headcase now isn't he?
I'm not

@pinkinmysky

Lol as if he’s gonna be messaging you on your wedding day Op

its so busy a day when you get wed - I never even looked at my phone all day

did you really honestly think you’d get a reply from him!!
YABU

@AmazingBouncingFerret when we were together he would change his profile pic to him and women he met on a night out to get reactions ...then when I asked who the woman was he would say "don't be jealous "
I'm just saying he's not stupid
He told me he made his ex jealous by putting pics on of me and him and she got married to make him jealous

You've just made his day. You've made him feel like a dog with two dicks, marrying one woman while another still wants him.

If he wants to tell everyone you’re the crazy ex, you’re giving him plenty of ammo and playing right into the narrative.

he was awful, so you’re well out of it surely?

leave him alone. Get counselling.

You should consider therapy to help you move on. You are investing time and energy on a person who treated you like crap. What you are doing is unhealthy, and you will potentially end up in another abusive relationship if you don’t work on your self esteem and pride.

If he treated you awfully then you need to be grateful it wasn't you marrying him, not be upset that he moved on.

Forget the message, it's done now and it doesn't matter what he thinks.

Block him on SM and speak to a therapist to help you move on.

OP, I can understand how you feel because I've been there. You were treated badly and you deserve an apology and an explanation.

The sad fact you have to swallow is that it isn't going to happen. Narcs do what they do because that's who they are. They don't change and they don't care.

Just feel sorry for the poor girl that's with him now because she's going to get the same treatment that you did.

This may help : natashaadamo.com/should-i-text-my-ex/

What was the point in messaging him? You're not going to get the response you want. Unfortunately, he doesn't care that he treated you like shit. He'll love the attention though and the fact that you're still affected by him. The best thing you could do is block him and focus on yourself.

Yes but it's done now Block and delete now

You should probably talk to someone so you can move on from this. Sending that message was not the best idea.

Surely, you know a narc won't give you an "explanation." Why are you wasting your time?
Changing his profile picture to his wife isn't to make you jealous.

What response were you expecting? Why did you feel the need to message him after all this time? We're you hoping he'd give you some closure before walking up the aisle? He treated you dreadfully, he won't have changed. He wasn't thinking about you and has moved on, you need to do the same.

It’s clear he really hurt you OP. It’s very hard to do but the best thing is to block all methods of communication, forget all about him and focus on yourself. Don’t worry about the message you sent as it’s done now, just look to the future.

Block and ignore. There's nothing to be gained from trying to contact him.You won't ever get a satisfactory explanation from him. You can't shame him or make him feel bad. Your message will have made him feel good, because it's attention and it shows him that you care what he thinks and therefore can still be played by him. He may well use you to triangulate his wife. The best thing you can do is protect yourself - block him, maybe seek some help. Lots of resources online.

Please do cut off any means of you being able to contact him or him being able to contact you. Distance yourself and don't beat yourself up about the message, it is done and you need to let it go. Just be glad it isn't you who has just got married to him. Do get some help and talk it through with someone.

What on earth possessed you to do that? 😱

He'll have loved it!

And man changes photo to wedding photo after just getting married is fairly standard.

He's living rent free in your head and you need to get rid. Move on.

Stop making an idiot of yourself and move on.

Why on earth would you do this? The timing is more than a little coincidental ...

Oh dear...

What reason can he give that would make any difference to you? He is awful, you are better off without him. Do not contact him again.

Contacting on his wedding day is wrong, and i am not surprised he didnt reply. However sounds like what he did was much worse so don't feel bad about it. Block any way of contacting him or seeing his social media for your own sake.

Yes he'll love that

You are crazy for doing that. Bat shit crazy.

How dare you interfere with his wedding day.

GET A GRIP

That was a really stupid thing to do and I don’t know what you thought you would gain from it.

He probably already thinks your a nut case if you keep messaging him and he never replys

all you’ve done is reveal yourself to be as unhinged as he thinks you are. why wouldn’t he change his profile picture to him and his wife? I’m mortified for you