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Original poster

The cost of dating- I spent £50 last night!

285 replies

Okclaro · 29/05/2022 11:24

It takes me a while to feel comfortable going back to someone’s or having them to me but this can’t keep up 😬

That was dinner, two drinks and a taxi home.

OP posts:
Vikinga · 29/05/2022 11:27

Meet in the day for a walk and a coffee. Or don't drink alcohol therefore you can drive and won't be spending lots on alcohol.

seaUrchinOne · 29/05/2022 11:29

How many times have you dated him?
Only do what you can afford, suggest a beach walk or a museum, something that's free, can he come over your way, take turns so you don't need to travel as much.

CupidStunt22 · 29/05/2022 11:37

Well yeah, thats what dinner, drinks and a taxi is going to cost, whoever you are out with.
Just do something cheaper if you can't afford it.

Bananalanacake · 29/05/2022 11:38

Do you take it in turns to pay

Afterfire · 29/05/2022 11:40

Daytime coffee. Then if you don’t like them it’s easier to get away too (make an excuse you have to be somewhere). Or you could end up liking them like dh and I and spend the entire afternoon chatting until they shut the coffee shop and throw you out (married 15 years now)!

IncompleteSenten · 29/05/2022 11:42

Did you pay or go halves?

Plan some less expensive things.

If you are currently paying it all, go halves.

nearlyspringyay · 29/05/2022 11:54

If you can't afford it suggest something cheaper / daytime.

Pretty cheap for a night out though.

girlmom21 · 29/05/2022 11:56

Agree with the others - don't have dates you can't afford.

Beautiful3 · 29/05/2022 12:00

Go for a walk, walk around a museum, grab coffees.

littlegreenheart · 29/05/2022 12:17

Is it a situation where your date(s) have more available funds than you and you're trying to keep up, or you're embarrassed to raise the cost subject? If £50 per date (not sure if that was half the cost or the full cost) is easy for them but not for you, consider taking turns choosing the place and whoever chooses pays.

Try lunch instead of dinner - which may also mean you can walk, bike, take public transit (if available) rather than a taxi?

Picnic in the park - divvy up who brings what or take turns organising. Gives you the cost savings benefit of cooking at home without the isolation of hosting/being hosted. And a bottle of wine or a few tins will be MUCH cheaper than drinks out.

getoutofheree · 29/05/2022 12:20

Yes, having a social life can cost money. Presumably you are enjoying yourself? £50 is not bad for a night out.

Dating doesn't only mean meeting up. If you are talking to one person and forming a relationship then a date each month will do? A coffee, a McDonald's, a walk in the park? Use your imagination.

Also, presumably you are going halves as you're not in a financial position to treat people?

Suprima · 29/05/2022 12:29

you’re dating wrong if you are paying early on tbh.

not a popular opinion- but a bloke who won’t buy you a couple of cocktails when he should be trying to impress you, is a man who’ll want 50% of the bills paid when you are on statutory maternity leave.

Luredbyapomegranate · 29/05/2022 12:33

Suprima · 29/05/2022 12:29

you’re dating wrong if you are paying early on tbh.

not a popular opinion- but a bloke who won’t buy you a couple of cocktails when he should be trying to impress you, is a man who’ll want 50% of the bills paid when you are on statutory maternity leave.

😄That is brilliantly illogically but funny enough to be top response of the morning

Luredbyapomegranate · 29/05/2022 12:36

Drinks only at the pub, Walk and Coffee, Gallery/Museum and Coffee, bowling and beer, cafe lunch… you don’t have to fork out for dinner till you know he’s worth it 😁

motogirl · 29/05/2022 12:37

Go for walks and a picnic then? Having been through old 3 years ago, it isn't cheap to date unless you want it to be. My now dp however suggested a walk rather than something expensive, we then went for food as we were enjoying each other's company ... now we have a house!

BiscoffSundae · 29/05/2022 12:39

This is one reason why I don’t date as on top of that I would need to pay for babysitters so looking at £100 a date 🤣🤣🤣 no offence to anyone but I’m not going on a walking date anyone that suggested that seems like a lazy date to me 😳

Pinkbonbon · 29/05/2022 12:41

If they aren't paying the first date it can start to add up. I only ever go to a coffee place on the first date or a pub on occasion if I feel a drink drink might work better. But even then I had three first dates in a row a few months back where I payed my way and it fair added up.

No way would I go to get food with someone early on. Even if they cover it, it's not very fair on them if it later doesn't work out. Hold off a few dates before doing anything that costs much. And if you can't afford it, look for cheaper places.

girlmom21 · 29/05/2022 12:41

BiscoffSundae · 29/05/2022 12:39

This is one reason why I don’t date as on top of that I would need to pay for babysitters so looking at £100 a date 🤣🤣🤣 no offence to anyone but I’m not going on a walking date anyone that suggested that seems like a lazy date to me 😳

You don't want to spend money on a date but a free date is lazy?

BiscoffSundae · 29/05/2022 12:43

girlmom21 · 29/05/2022 12:41

You don't want to spend money on a date but a free date is lazy?

Show quote history

Low effort. It’s one of the reasons why I don’t date I don’t mind £50 on its own but adding in babysitters is not worth it to me. But no I wouldn’t date a man who suggested a walk 🙄

Blaze1886 · 29/05/2022 12:47

Don't drink alcohol then you remove the expensive drinks and taxi

womaninatightspot · 29/05/2022 12:50

Beautiful3 · 29/05/2022 12:00

Go for a walk, walk around a museum, grab coffees.

This is what I used to do when I lived in Edinburgh. Dean gallery and gallery of modern art used to have loads of people doing the same thing. Decent coffee/ cake too

Irishfarmer · 29/05/2022 12:52

I think coffee/ going for a pint is a cheaper thing to do. Also a lot quicker, I don't think I've ever been to dinner as a 1st date it's very formal and long. If it's not meeting someone from online it would be nice to go for a drive and stop off at a local beauty spot for a walk. If you are meeting for the first time from OLD might not be safe.
Or meet your DH working on a farm where you live/ work together then get together! No dates required 😂(we did have dates once we started going out)

CornishGem1975 · 29/05/2022 12:56

£50 for dinner, drinks and a taxi sounds reasonable to me?! I spent £40 just on a taxi last night 😡. I'd suggest planning cheaper dates, or as others have said, drop the drinks and drive.

Whatsonmymindgrapes · 29/05/2022 13:01

That’s a very standard of not cheap night out- do you not go out with friends!? It would cost at least that!

CupidStunt22 · 29/05/2022 13:02

Suprima · 29/05/2022 12:29

you’re dating wrong if you are paying early on tbh.

not a popular opinion- but a bloke who won’t buy you a couple of cocktails when he should be trying to impress you, is a man who’ll want 50% of the bills paid when you are on statutory maternity leave.

Or a woman who expects a man to pay for her is a woman who will expect 100% of the bills paid forever.

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