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Original poster

Inappropriate behaviour from a guy I am seeing?

312 replies

Charliec12 · 17/05/2022 22:14

I have been seeing a guy for 6 months now we are taking things slow and not official. He gets anger issues and has depression and drinking does not help. Last weekend we were at his ex girlfriend’s house for a bbq (he is still good friends with her). Anyway the ex girlf split up with her new partner that evening and he moved out. The partner who moved out blames the guy I am seeing for it all as he is good friends with this girl still and the guy I am seeing goes round there a lot still. Anyway I found out the next day that to wind the partner up who had moved out that night the guy I am seeing had decided to send messages to the partner about what he was doing in bed to his ex girlf who is also the guy I am seeing’s ex girlf too. I got sent the screenshots sadly. This is out of order isn’t it from the guy I am seeing even though we are not official? He was very drunk and said he did it to wind the ex partner up who had just split up with the girl. The partner I am seeing has not apologised to me about it either

OP posts:
Sisiwawa · 17/05/2022 22:18

He sounds like a twat

MJ123 · 17/05/2022 22:18

I'm sorry but you all sound super young.

I'd give this one a miss and focus on yourself for a while

DelphiniumBlue · 17/05/2022 22:19

Anger issues, depression, drinks too much, and then text his ex's new ex about what they've been doing in bed? Grim doesn't doesn't begin to describe this scenario! Why would you want an apology, surely you're not thinking of staying with him? How could an apology make up for him being such a sleaze?

AnyFucker · 17/05/2022 22:20

er, what ?

UnintentionallyRidiculous · 17/05/2022 22:21

He sounds like quite a catch, not. Dump him and raise your bar. I'm sure you could do a lot better.

growinggreyer · 17/05/2022 22:22

This is the point in your post where I would have dumped him... "he gets anger issues." What is your life going to look like with this man in it?

DropYourSword · 17/05/2022 22:23

If it's even true (did he really just do it to wind the guy up, or is he actually cheating?) it sounds like there's very like positive about the guy you're seeing. Anger, alcohol issues, immaturity, sending goady texts. Not a great look.

Stichintime · 17/05/2022 22:25

What is this??**$#^^&

glamosaurus · 17/05/2022 22:27

Er.. so don't make it "official". Slow down so much that you stop seeing this twat. Job done.

rattlemehearties · 17/05/2022 22:28

What are you actually asking? Surely you can do better? Move on from all of them

LoudingVoice · 17/05/2022 22:29

Ffs walk away from this absolute shit show right now, the entire situation has red flags all over it.

Thepossibility · 17/05/2022 22:29

Run

sammylady37 · 17/05/2022 22:33

Why would you bother?

DatingDinosaur · 17/05/2022 22:33

Doesn’t matter whether or not you’re “official”.

You’ve been seeing each other for 6 months so that means there’s more to you and him than some FWB or FB situation.

So yes. It’s shit behaviour.

He has anger issues.
He has depression.
He drinks too much.
He’s too invested in his ex gf.

None of that is your responsibility to resolve.

Dump him.

CornishTiger · 17/05/2022 22:34

Raise your standards!!

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 17/05/2022 22:37

If after six months you’re still not official and still he’s the ‘guy you are seeing’ (seriously, how many times can that phrase be used in one paragraph?) rather than a boyfriend, just cut your losses and walk away. Neither of you sounds overly invested in whatever it is you have and everyone sounds far too immature to be in an actual relationship, so what have you got to lose?

Georgeskitchen · 17/05/2022 22:37

The amount of red flags in yoir post,
Just the anger issues should be sending you running as fast as you can. Don't invite misery into your life . Slam the door now while you still can

elle1005 · 17/05/2022 22:42

I'll be honest, I got a bit lost halfway through and don't quite know who is who. But nevertheless, he sounds like an idiot and you need to get rid.

At the early stages of a relationship, things should be smooth sailing as you're trying to impress each other. If he pulls these stunts now, just imagine how bad it will get further down the line.

Get out of there whilst you're not as invested in him yet, otherwise you'll end up putting up with all sorts of nonsense. It's giving me potential cheater vibes. Using drinking to excuse his behaviour is a huge red flag for me.

Mrssheppard18 · 17/05/2022 22:43

Oohhh it’s like an episode of hollyoaks

NeverDropYourMooncup · 17/05/2022 22:44

elle1005 · 17/05/2022 22:42

I'll be honest, I got a bit lost halfway through and don't quite know who is who. But nevertheless, he sounds like an idiot and you need to get rid.

At the early stages of a relationship, things should be smooth sailing as you're trying to impress each other. If he pulls these stunts now, just imagine how bad it will get further down the line.

Get out of there whilst you're not as invested in him yet, otherwise you'll end up putting up with all sorts of nonsense. It's giving me potential cheater vibes. Using drinking to excuse his behaviour is a huge red flag for me.

I got as far as the second line - He gets anger issues and has depression and drinking does not help

Fuck. That.

Loginmystery · 17/05/2022 22:44

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 17/05/2022 22:37

If after six months you’re still not official and still he’s the ‘guy you are seeing’ (seriously, how many times can that phrase be used in one paragraph?) rather than a boyfriend, just cut your losses and walk away. Neither of you sounds overly invested in whatever it is you have and everyone sounds far too immature to be in an actual relationship, so what have you got to lose?

but apart from that I’d stop seeing this guy at once. The guy you’re seeing is no good. You need to see other guys. Or even see no guys. I would see if I could see myself out. Seriously.

Benjispruce4 · 17/05/2022 22:46

Honestly? Move on. Why settle for that? Value yourself!

Unanananana · 17/05/2022 22:46

What a load of ridiculous drama! You all sound 13 years old.

Ditch the prick and raise your standards.

TomatoorChips · 17/05/2022 22:50

GCSEs tomorrow
Get a good nights sleep

flowerpot258 · 17/05/2022 22:52

Get rid of him. He sounds like a narcissistic a**hole. The fact he's still good friends with his EX and still goes round to hers quite a lot is a red flag in my book. Seems like he's still hung up on her and doesn't actually care about you at all. I'd get out before you end up getting hurt.

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