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Original poster

Inappropriate behaviour from a guy I am seeing?

312 replies

Charliec12 · 17/05/2022 22:14

I have been seeing a guy for 6 months now we are taking things slow and not official. He gets anger issues and has depression and drinking does not help. Last weekend we were at his ex girlfriend’s house for a bbq (he is still good friends with her). Anyway the ex girlf split up with her new partner that evening and he moved out. The partner who moved out blames the guy I am seeing for it all as he is good friends with this girl still and the guy I am seeing goes round there a lot still. Anyway I found out the next day that to wind the partner up who had moved out that night the guy I am seeing had decided to send messages to the partner about what he was doing in bed to his ex girlf who is also the guy I am seeing’s ex girlf too. I got sent the screenshots sadly. This is out of order isn’t it from the guy I am seeing even though we are not official? He was very drunk and said he did it to wind the ex partner up who had just split up with the girl. The partner I am seeing has not apologised to me about it either

OP posts:
MrsJorahMormont · 18/05/2022 07:24

Why oh why would you be dating this guy? Seriously?

Keroppi · 18/05/2022 07:26

Get rid and get some respect for yourself! Dating a weirdo who fights people and who isn't even a good shag!! At his grown age! Woman up! You know you deserve better.

Inthesameboatatmo · 18/05/2022 07:26

Not official after months = SHAG PIECE!!!. At this age you really should have higher standards for yourself. I feel like you must secretly love all drama because anyone else with half a brain cell would've been gone months ago. He's a manchild who throws his toys out of his pram frequently. He's an abuser and he's basically disrespected you to your face by carrying on like this. Get out ffs and raise your bar op.

Original poster
Charliec12 · 18/05/2022 07:35

Inthesameboatatmo · 18/05/2022 07:26

Not official after months = SHAG PIECE!!!. At this age you really should have higher standards for yourself. I feel like you must secretly love all drama because anyone else with half a brain cell would've been gone months ago. He's a manchild who throws his toys out of his pram frequently. He's an abuser and he's basically disrespected you to your face by carrying on like this. Get out ffs and raise your bar op.

We have hardly slept together so not that but yes Sat night was a final straw really. In have tried to help him so much with his MH in the last few months. He wants to fight the barman in his local pub too and I have been trying to calm that down but it all stems down to his anger issues

OP posts:
CandyLeBonBon · 18/05/2022 07:38

God OP the more you wrote the worse he sounds. Seriously, why are you wasting time on this loser? He'll hit you too you know. It's just a matter of time.

Baggingarea · 18/05/2022 07:41

Every sentence of your post contained a red flag. Call it off now. He’s only going to be trouble.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 18/05/2022 07:42

Are you a parent OP?

Unanananana · 18/05/2022 07:42

Charliec12 · 18/05/2022 07:35

We have hardly slept together so not that but yes Sat night was a final straw really. In have tried to help him so much with his MH in the last few months. He wants to fight the barman in his local pub too and I have been trying to calm that down but it all stems down to his anger issues

Show quote history

WOMEN ARE NOT REHABS FOR MEN.

Why are you trying to calm him down? Walk away from this loser. You are worth more.

Alcemeg · 18/05/2022 08:03

You say "he gets anger issues" like it's a bout of sniffles he caught at the bus stop one morning. This is who he is. It sounds like he is also a complete wanker.

Original poster
Charliec12 · 18/05/2022 08:07

Alcemeg · 18/05/2022 08:03

You say "he gets anger issues" like it's a bout of sniffles he caught at the bus stop one morning. This is who he is. It sounds like he is also a complete wanker.

Yep and he came off his anti depressants recently too :(

OP posts:
Bonbon21 · 18/05/2022 08:08

For Gawds sake walk away... no... RUN...
You are old enough to know this is shit.
You dont need a man so much that you put up with this.
Grow some self respect and higher standards.
If a man needs so much support let him get it somewhere else!
Not your job!

ChaToilLeam · 18/05/2022 08:12

Dear Lord, he’s 41 and carrying on like that? RUN!!! And afterwards, have a good think about why you were with him so long. He sounds bloody awful. You are not a support system for angry, inadequate men.

Crystalvas · 18/05/2022 08:14

Dump and run OP. Plenty of red flags here. Relationships are not meant to be that hard.

CanofCant · 18/05/2022 08:18

I'm late to the party here but, he's 41?! By the time I had read the first two sentences of your post I had had enough so God only knows how you feel. Really it's all too much isn't it? How can you be bothered? Are you of a similar age?

He won't improve. Severe all ties OP and walk away from this shit show.

GentlemanJay · 18/05/2022 08:23

Your fella sounds like a right catch. Lol.

TurtleCavalryIsSeriousShit · 18/05/2022 08:31

Op, I think you need some serious professional help. I mean this kindly.

You seem to take people's questions quite literally, as if you can't grasp the nuances behind them.

You definitely need to dump him and work on your own self esteem first, before getting into another relationship.

ProudThrilledHappy · 18/05/2022 08:42

You aren’t a rehab centre for emotionally fucked up men. This man takes so much work and offers you so little back. You don’t even feel comfortable calling him boyfriend yet, it’s “the guy Im seeing”- if he cared about you at all at this stage you wouldn’t have any doubts.

Run away from the emotional train wreck and look for someone who wants to spend their weekends with you, not their ex

Watchkeys · 18/05/2022 08:46

He wants to fight the barman in his local pub too and I have been trying to calm that down but it all stems down to his anger issues

Don't ever try to calm someone's anger down. If they are angry, it's their responsibility to sort that out.

Why have you taken his anger on as your responsibility? Did it make you feel good?

MyneighbourisTotoro · 18/05/2022 08:46

Sounds like a awful mess to be involved with, time to walk away and find a more suitable partner

Scabbyknackers · 18/05/2022 08:48

Fuck him off mate. He has anger issues and told people that he was shagging someone else whilst with you. That is very disrespectful and not normal behaviour

Starseeking · 18/05/2022 08:49

What is this rubbish?!? Just move on from him, he sounds like a waste of space.

Joessaysthankyou · 18/05/2022 09:00

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

CandidaAlbicans2 · 18/05/2022 09:06

"He gets anger issues and has depression and drinking does not help"

The time you realised this behaviour was not a one off was the time to stop seeing him. As for the texts to his ex-GF's ex-BF, well, that would be it for me, but then I hate wind-up merchants with a passion. Why do they behave like twats!?

Thesefeetaremadeforwalking · 18/05/2022 09:11

You just don't need all this drama OP, move on.

Original poster
Charliec12 · 18/05/2022 09:14

Scabbyknackers · 18/05/2022 08:48

Fuck him off mate. He has anger issues and told people that he was shagging someone else whilst with you. That is very disrespectful and not normal behaviour

Thanks that really hurt :(

OP posts: