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Original poster

Tick tock: the one where Geller discovers Polly is no longer a doormat

995 replies

StuckInPollyannaMode · 04/03/2022 22:23

AKA Co-parenting: I do not think it means what you think it means

Here we go again my lovelies! Will this be the one where I finally get divorced?!

Previous thread here

I have clock news! Turns out, no one wants it. Quelle surprise. Could I sell it? No, sez I, it’s worth ha’penny tuppence on a good day. Plus, no time.

Ha ha.

I suggested, because I am a kind hearted soul and because it’s already in a box and I don’t know which one that they keep the clock face and I get rid of the mechanism and the case. That appears to be a reasonable compromise. Pass me an axe.

The reason for the clock conversation? My brother phoned. My mother has given away my grandfather’s WW1 medals to a museum. WTF?! We’re going to try and get them back. She can’t see what she’s done wrong.

Solicitors on the other side for the house purchase are useless. Estate agent spoke to them today. They are awaiting proof of ID and funds on account?! WTF. I lost my shit a bit. I’d just come back from having a filling so I sounded three gins down, which I’m sure added to the effect.

Oh, and I haven’t stopped laughing for the last hour. A friend has found Geller’s profile on a dating app. It contains such gems as ‘addressing climate change one word at a time in my career as a professional’ and goes on to claim he ‘always has time’

Given me the best laugh I’ve had since my solicitor said she’d call me just to be sure that I wanted to file for absolute once the finance order is made…

Anyway, buckle up loves. It’ll be a ride, as ever…glad you could join me.

OP posts:
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Original poster
StuckInPollyannaMode · 08/04/2022 14:31

Building blocks…well, more like Lego pieces!

Feels like a big step forward for me.

OP posts:
AcrossthePond55 · 08/04/2022 14:32

@StuckInPollyannaMode

Stage one of the Failsafe Fuckwit Strategy complete. He’s just picked up the Dollies stuff prior to Easter hols. He said he felt I’d withdrawn and I don’t want to talk to him. I told him the level of communication was completely unacceptable and he needed to respect my boundaries. He looked rather nonplussed and I then said I wanted to put a more rigid procedure in place after their birthday as frankly the level of communication is bordering on harassment.

Then he tried to tell me that the Dollies need to meet Westley as they are confused about whether he is my partner. I said that wasn’t his business, it was my decision and they know full well he is my boyfriend. He said they’d struggled with me being away and I had the satisfaction of telling him I’d been away numerous times that he and they didn’t even know about.

He looked incredibly confused and seemed to shrink a little.

Then showed I him the door! (Metaphorically, I was standing on the drive)

Good for you!!

He wants the Dollies to meet Westley so he can pump them for info on him. And possibly to try to upset them about him to get them to pressure you to end the relationship. Geller will only be happy if you are permanently single and abstinent.

And great about saying you want more rigid procedures. You need to present him with a 'this is the way it's going to be' dictum as a fait accompli.

prettybird · 08/04/2022 15:01

I had the satisfaction of telling him I’d been away numerous times that he and they didn’t even know about.

Be careful that he doesn't try to use that to sow doubt in the Dollies' minds, saying something like "Your mum has been going away and not even telling you. That shows she doesn't really care about you and cares more about this new man in her life as she goes away and has fun with him and leaves me to look after you" Hmm

He'd be happy to twist the facts to suit his narrative Angry

Mix56 · 08/04/2022 15:15

"He said he felt I’d withdrawn and I don’t want to talk to him."
The obvious response was, "That is Correct.
Your endless pointless messages/mails/calls need to cease."

Mix56 · 08/04/2022 15:15

So exciting re the house !!

Newestname002 · 08/04/2022 15:29

@StuckInPollyannaMode

Stage one of the Failsafe Fuckwit Strategy complete. He’s just picked up the Dollies stuff prior to Easter hols. He said he felt I’d withdrawn and I don’t want to talk to him. I told him the level of communication was completely unacceptable and he needed to respect my boundaries. He looked rather nonplussed and I then said I wanted to put a more rigid procedure in place after their birthday as frankly the level of communication is bordering on harassment.

Then he tried to tell me that the Dollies need to meet Westley as they are confused about whether he is my partner. I said that wasn’t his business, it was my decision and they know full well he is my boyfriend. He said they’d struggled with me being away and I had the satisfaction of telling him I’d been away numerous times that he and they didn’t even know about.

He looked incredibly confused and seemed to shrink a little.

Then showed I him the door! (Metaphorically, I was standing on the drive)

Well done @StuckInPollyannaMode. Glad you've got your plan going for your Failsafe Fuckwit Strategy. Beware of sharing anything at all with Geller though, which isn't strictly to do with your girls or, as as per your solicitor's instructions, the legalities around the divorce agreement. He has had years of manipulating you and you are still catching up. He is also, unlike you, neither a nice or a kind person, and he'll use anything - including your children - as leverage to get what he wants, so please continue to be on guard.

Fingers crossed for the Exchange - you can then give a sigh of relief and look forward to the next stage.

There's definitely a light at the end of this tunnel - stay strong and focussed. 🌹

REignbow · 08/04/2022 18:44

Well done @StuckInPollyannaMode!

Like the PP has said, you are a very nice person who is kind and he (and also your family) are not.

It might also help to write down some choice responses, that continue to put him into place!

LivingDeadGirlUK · 08/04/2022 23:18

Oh Polly 3 years is a really long time to do a LDR :(

Fraaahnces · 08/04/2022 23:49

I would have said, “You do realise that’s what divorce is for, right?”
“I will introduce a partner as and when I am fully confident that this is what I want to do. I have no intention of dragging people in and out of their lives and destabilizing them.”

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 04:34

Sorry Peeps. I dumped and ran. Twin Two lived in Australia. Twin One lived here. Twin One, who lived here was diagnosed with cancer, and Twin Two was due to visit in April (this month) arrived at the end of March. No one was expecting her. She just arrived unannounced. I asked her "Is there something you're not telling me?" and she looked at me and said no. I knew she was lying. Not only to me, but herself. Sadly, Twin One died a couple of days later, and then, Twin Two died on the operating table, having exploratory surgery for bowel cancer. They were SO weird! That connection thing that twins have. And! They were both very naughty. They had the same boyfriend! Hilarious! I have always failed to understand how people couldn't tell the difference between them. Even though they're identical, in every way, I still find it difficult to understand how people cannot tell them apart. They look SO different! Or is it because I grew up with them? That's probably it. Sorry, this is really late, but I can't sleep. I can't believe they're both not here and I'm being silly and wobbly x please give your loved ones a hug x take care of them and cherish every moment x

Tereseta · 09/04/2022 04:54

@BobISMyUncle so sorry for your loss. My mil is an identical twin and it is a wierd thing to witness. Especially when they have conversations half in their heads, half out loud!

Take comfort in their connection that they were together in the end Flowers and the lovely memories you have of them. Sending a big hug your way.

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 04:55

I know this might be a REALLY stupid idea, but could you have him done for stalking? Harassment? Something of that ilk? I don't know! Can you talk to your SHL and get something to stop him? FFS! Polly, you make me SO CROSS! Not you, but somehow, you're still allowing him to do this! AARRGGHH! I know it's not your fault, but someone needs to take charge and it clearly won't be The Masher of The Knees.
Incidentally, the "friend" in Parkhurst is no longer with us, (no loss, some would say) and my friend's patio is now filled in. If anyone else has a patio, I'm more than happy and willing to provide an alibi. Apart from that, does he still not understand that he's The Common Denominator?
Sorry, laughing to myself, because I spelled it Demoninator and got a red squiggly line underneath! I couldn't help laughing, I thought it was very appropriate. Chins and Gins Polly.

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 06:14

Thank you

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 06:57

Still wide awake! Spying on neighbours.
OH! NOT spying! Observing!! Observing neighbours.
Nothing to see here.
I'm being bored. Thinking of taking up arm knitting. Just need some wool. My mum used to unravel me, while I was still wearing it. Truly. I am not lying. I remember having to swivel around so she could unpick me. OH! and Polly! Please may I remind you of why it is SO blissful, to live on your own? Please? Go on, let me! Your Dollies will adapt, I promise promise promise
If you don't want to cook, you don't have to
If you don't want to wash up after cooking, you don't have to
If you don't want to be told that you've been sat on your fat arse all day, you don't have to
If you don't want to be punched, albeit because you're small and he thought he could get away with it, you don't have to
If he telephones the shops in advance of your visit, you don't have to visit those shops
If you're accused of being an anything you don't have to
If you're belittled, in any way
If you know you can be a something, in some way

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 07:12

Sorry Polly. Having a moment or 306. sorry.

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 07:21

I so miss my twins. How very dare they FFS! both of them? At nearly the same time

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 07:23

Sorry, a proper wobbly moment

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 07:41

Sorry sorry sorry Polly. This is your page. Just having moments

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 08:12

Polly, can you please stop thinking about your girls, for a moment? It sounds horrific but for every moment that you spend arguing the toss, it costs you. Serious money. It cost me over £7000 for my husband to divorce me. Most of it in legal fees. Apparently, I was adulterous!! Even though he decided to leave me and our little family. Crimes Against Women aren't always on the streets. Most are hidden.

BobISMyUncle · 09/04/2022 08:14

Sorry, my sister would know what to do.

Fraaahnces · 09/04/2022 10:34

@BobISMyUncle- I know you have suffered a huge loss - well, two! And such a shock. Have you had therapy? I am beginning to think that maybe you might be the invisible sibling of the identical twins and now don’t know who you are without them. (It’s not uncommon.) Please make time to plan your own adventure, Love. Learn who you are and what you want without anyone else’s opninions. X

Fraaahnces · 09/04/2022 10:35

PS… I am the mother of non-identical twins, and the sister of dead identical twins. Much empathy. X

comfortablyfrumpy · 09/04/2022 11:45

@BobISMyUncle I an very sorry for your loss x

comfortablyfrumpy · 09/04/2022 11:46

Abd you also, @Fraaahnces x

Original poster
StuckInPollyannaMode · 09/04/2022 22:04

Oh @BobISMyUncle I’m so sorry.

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