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Original poster

Turning a blind eye to repeated cheating

231 replies

JamSandwich0 · 28/02/2022 23:10

Does anyone ignore partner indescretions for a happy peaceful life?

Pretending you don't know what's going on and enjoying your life together regardless.

OP posts:
whiteworldgettingwhiter · 28/02/2022 23:14

No. Why would you? It wouldn't be a happy or peaceful life if you knew about your partner cheating on you.

GreyCarpet · 28/02/2022 23:15

No. I wouldn't. I'm worth more than that.

I know someone who does though. We're not friends anymore - I couldn't respect her or her husband. And she is a hollow shell of a woman but, hey, at least she gets to say she's married... 🤷🏻‍♀️

DatingDinosaur · 28/02/2022 23:16

No. Not even to one incident of cheating.

Sundancerintherain · 28/02/2022 23:17

No.

surlycurly · 28/02/2022 23:17

I couldn't either. And I've lost friends over it too- stopped talking to a friend of 10 plus years a year or so ago as I'd simply lost all respect for her. She was miserable and unpleasant and often just rude but at least she kept her three story house. Sold her soul as he swung his dick about Europe.

Chilledchablis1 · 28/02/2022 23:20

Not me however I know a woman who has tolerated more than 30 years of cheating by her DH . He is wealthy and she isn’t prepared to step away and give up her lovely house, villa in the sun etc etc

Clymene · 28/02/2022 23:22

@JamSandwich0

Does anyone ignore partner indescretions for a happy peaceful life?

Pretending you don't know what's going on and enjoying your life together regardless.

Well it's not happy is it? It might be peaceful I suppose. But plastering a brave face on to maintain a financially comfortable lifestyle (the only reason I can think of as to why you'd put up with it) isn't happiness.

It's exhausting living a life of cognitive dissonance. It's why some women become very brittle.

Deadringer · 28/02/2022 23:23

Hell no

longcoffeebreak · 28/02/2022 23:28

People do I think. Could be because they accept it or turn a blind eye or could be that they are totally in denial.

ihavetogoshoppingnow · 28/02/2022 23:28

It’s not a happy life it’s a false one

AnneLovesGilbert · 28/02/2022 23:29

Are you writing an article?

MrJollyLivesNextDoor · 28/02/2022 23:31

If he was filthy millionaire type rich I would.

Crack on, I'll be at the spa or in the Bahamas with the girls or whatever 😀

TacCat49 · 28/02/2022 23:40

So does that mean that he buys you a valentines present and then one for the OW? Does he have one holiday with you and then one with the OW?
Why would you let a man compromise your sexual health? And what if the OW gets pregnant? I would hardly call that a happy life. You need to rethink this.

Luredbyapomegranate · 28/02/2022 23:48

People do.

As long as the trade of is genuinely worth it for you, then fine.

WomblingWilma · 01/03/2022 00:01

Well you’re not ‘enjoying your life together’. It’s you, then him enjoying whoever else he wants to shag on the sidelines. Perhaps there will be one he decides to be with full time. Do you still have sex with him knowing he’s just come from shagging someone else? Even share a bed knowing that he’s been with someone else? Cook him dinner and watch him eat it knowing he’s thinking of someone else?

I could perhaps put up with it if I had a mansion big enough for a separate wing, had staff so did nothing for him, lived a separate life and had my own lover outside the house. Just stayed ‘married’ for the kids and so I didn’t have to cope with whatever new woman he might expose my DC to and didn’t have to send them to him on weekends but only while they were under 16.

MsDogLady · 01/03/2022 01:42

No. I wouldn’t be complicit in his emotional/sexual incontinence that makes a mockery of me and our family. I couldn’t be happy and peaceful with that malignancy festering beneath the surface. What a poor example I’d be setting for my daughter.

Are you looking the other way, OP?

drybird · 01/03/2022 06:38

That's no life, if your partner can treat you like that! I speak from experience.. it eats away at you

Onlyrainbows · 01/03/2022 06:45

It's more common than you think... I know at least 3 cases

hashbrownsandwich · 01/03/2022 06:48

It's more awkward when you are the one who knows a couple who live like this but the rest of your/their family doesn't ...

girlmom21 · 01/03/2022 06:54

People certainly do. I never could.

GeneLovesJezebel · 01/03/2022 06:55

No. I wouldn’t accept one.

cherrytopcake · 01/03/2022 06:57

@MrJollyLivesNextDoor

If he was filthy millionaire type rich I would.

Crack on, I'll be at the spa or in the Bahamas with the girls or whatever 😀

Ha! Yes!
cherrytopcake · 01/03/2022 07:01

I would only put up with it if he was filthy rich and never home so I can have things the way I like. And supposing I wouldn't really like him anyway, I'd be happy that he's never home, can do what I like. It's a win win. But I'm talking very rich here.

Original poster
JamSandwich0 · 01/03/2022 12:57

@TacCat49

So does that mean that he buys you a valentines present and then one for the OW? Does he have one holiday with you and then one with the OW? Why would you let a man compromise your sexual health? And what if the OW gets pregnant? I would hardly call that a happy life. You need to rethink this.
It's a number of flings /one night stands that im referring to. Not so much emotional relationships.

I have honestly never considered if there is presents or money spent always assumed it was DTD and leave...

I would never dig which I think helps, never have proof nor look for any. Received messages from women making claims and just deleted them never accused my husband.

OP posts:
pheonixrebirth · 01/03/2022 13:05

I just can't understand how you wouldn't even ask him?! She sought you out and you just deny it to yourself. What's so wonderful about this man that means you lack respect for yourself? I'm honestly interested in how your mind works in such a situation.