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Original poster

Has anyone experienced such an intense chemistry with a new partner before?

249 replies

OrlandointheWilderness · 30/06/2021 21:03

I've just started seeing someone. From the second I saw him it has been overwhelming, there is an incredible pull towards him but a familiarity at the same time. Sexually it is like nothing I've ever experienced before. He is feeling the same - he brought it up the other day and said about it. It's like a craving, but instead of craving on a purely sexual level I'm craving him. We connect on an intellectual and emotional level too, it's effortless and feels as easy as breathing.

It's terrifying me quite frankly! We started seeing each other three weeks ago and I'm not a lovesick teenager, I'm a grown woman and he is a grown man. As back ground we've never met before but have mutual friends and he is pretty universally thought of as a decent, good man.
Does anyone have experience of this?!

OP posts:
LawnFever · 30/06/2021 22:07

@Naaaaah

no, never. no one before you has ever experienced a deep sexual/emotional connection with someone. you are the first.
Well yeah obviously Wink
AnneLovesGilbert · 30/06/2021 22:07

@Naaaaah

no, never. no one before you has ever experienced a deep sexual/emotional connection with someone. you are the first.
Having a bad day?
ladybee28 · 30/06/2021 22:09

Yup.

Utterly intoxicating –which made it harder to leave when it turned utterly toxic.

Everyone we knew thought he was the dog's bollocks, too, which made me question if I'd lost the plot entirely.

Current partner was a slow burn.

Very unsure of each other when we first met, I almost left a few times, and he's not the kind of man I ever thought I'd end up with.

But over time it's like we peel back layer after layer and find something even better underneath.

Not as giddy as the intoxication, but I trust it far more.

(Not to say that your intoxication is a bad thing, OP –enjoy it!)

brittleheadgirl · 30/06/2021 22:14

Yes.
I saw my now dh across a room and I literally felt like I'd been punched in the stomach, I was just rooted to the spot, totally speechless.
I was actually out with my ex dh at the time Blush

It's a very long story but we eventually got together (zero scandal, no affair) and in the first few months I lost almost a stone because I was so giddy about him that I could barely eat. He was the same, the chemistry was mind blowing.

11 years later we are still very much in love.

BananaSpanner · 30/06/2021 22:19

My worst relationship was the one that started as you described. My best two relationships were much more slow burn including my now husband of 9 years.

lothermand · 30/06/2021 22:44

I met someone 7 weeks ago, it is exactly as you describe, and yes very scary. I'm no lovesick teen either, and it's not a giddiness, it's like he is part of me. The feeling is mutual, we were comfortable from the very first meeting.

Will it last? Who knows, but I think enough of him to do what it takes to make it last. I have been around the block more times than I care to remember, but I can honestly say, I genuinely like him, not just fancy, not an infatuation, just like him a lot.

TedMullins · 30/06/2021 22:47

@inmyslippers

Yes he turned out to be a narcissist and was love bombing me
Same with me unfortunately. It was future-faking and the facade fell away within weeks. It’s happened a couple of times. I now no longer date men!
ILoveShula · 30/06/2021 22:59

It's lust. Take a cold shower.

GrandmasCat · 30/06/2021 23:05

Yes. Now, years later, the immense attraction is not as a strong but I continue to love the man, the nice conversations and his kind heart very very much.

Baycitystroller · 30/06/2021 23:08

@ILoveShula

It's lust. Take a cold shower.
Yep.
Gladiolys · 30/06/2021 23:12

Yes, felt like this when I met my husband! Called my sister the day after I met him and said I had found the man I was going to marry. Have been together for 14 years now, still love the very bones of him.

DixonD · 30/06/2021 23:18

Yes - absolutely “head over heels” but it only lasted six months before he decided I wasn’t the one for him!

Two years later we got back together and although still wonderful, it was much less all-encompassing. A much better, stable relationship the second time around! We’re married now, been together for 15 years.

Tiw8 · 30/06/2021 23:18

Yes but I was married at the time as was he, so nothing happened. I had to move jobs at i couldn’t work with him. I’ve never experienced anything like it before or since.

MiddleParking · 30/06/2021 23:26

Yep. God, he was a prick.

Happymum12345 · 30/06/2021 23:30

Enjoy every moment of it & long may it last!

Libelula21 · 30/06/2021 23:33

I think the pandemic and all the restrictions that have come with it have made everything more intense.

Recently I met up with two couples, all of us old friends, and the intensity of all the different energies flying around made me feel like I was a psychic.

Buggritbuggrit · 01/07/2021 00:02

Yes, and it was delightful. I was about 18 at the time, though. When seeking a long term partner (which obviously might not be what you’re looking for), I’m not sure gutwrenching sexual chemistry is super high up on my list. ‘Craving him’ is all very well, but I’d be asking boring questions like - is he nice to you? Respectful? Do you want the same things?

I do wish you the very best of luck, though. Enjoy it!

BertieBotts · 01/07/2021 00:13

Yes but I'm afraid it wasn't a healthy relationship for me.

I would also be wary if love bombing. Maybe read up about it just in case.

Original poster
OrlandointheWilderness · 01/07/2021 00:29

Just to be clear it isn't a sexual thing - yes there is an element of it there, and the sex is utterly incredible, but it does go far past that.
And I'm pretty well versed on love bombing - there has been no warning signs that I've seen from him.
I am also completely aware of everything that can go wrong here. That why I posted really - this is scary! Wonderful, but terrifying.

OP posts:
seriouslystressedoutmama · 01/07/2021 00:39

@OrlandointheWilderness by all accounts it sounds like you should just enjoy every single moment: (coming from someone who'd love to experience that)

Themeparklover · 01/07/2021 00:42

Yes he became toxic and abusive and we split after 5 years

AnotherSunrise · 01/07/2021 00:51

@OrlandointheWilderness

Just to be clear it isn't a sexual thing - yes there is an element of it there, and the sex is utterly incredible, but it does go far past that. And I'm pretty well versed on love bombing - there has been no warning signs that I've seen from him. I am also completely aware of everything that can go wrong here. That why I posted really - this is scary! Wonderful, but terrifying.
It's only been 3 weeks
MorriseysGladioli · 01/07/2021 01:01

Yes, the minute I clapped eyes on my ex I was totally smitten.
We had the most wonderful time, laughing, being daft, having gloriously dirty sex, and all that.
Then he ghosted me after six years together.
Such pain from something that had such potential.
Never again I tell ya.

Cheesypea · 01/07/2021 01:16

@inmyslippers

Yes he turned out to be a narcissist and was love bombing me
^this
RobinMansions · 01/07/2021 01:20

I’m 50 and I’ve never had this. Ah well!