I think there’s another phone

[Dissillusioned]

I may be paranoid but a couple of things lately have me thinking dp may have a secret phone.
I’ve looked but can’t find one, so I could be totally wrong but my gut is telling me to keep looking.
What I’m asking is, those that have found a secret phone, where was it hidden? I’m hoping there’s places I haven’t thought to look. I’m also hoping I’m wrong and just paranoid as I do have form for overthinking things, but I’m watching dp like a hawk right now.

If you don’t trust him then you need to address it with him directly

Well that's no way to have to live. I mean if the trust is gone then really, is the relationship even worth salvaging?

That aside, do you notice him spending more time in the bathroom? If so, have you checked the toilet cistern?

From reading posts like this it always seems to be found in a car or a gym bag. But with lockdown it rule those places out. But if i was being sneaky with a phone i would hide it in the pockets of coats i dont wear much, normally buried under other coats.

Have you checked his car?

Reminds me of the series Dr Foster and the secret phone was found in a bag in the boot of his car

Coat pocket
Work bag
Glovebox/side pockets/boot/gym bag in the car
Inside a rolled up pair of socks at the bottom of sock drawer
Find out how many/which devices are connecting to your wifi, if there’s one that can’t be accounted for, then there’s a good chance its his second phone.

Why do you think he has a secret phone OP?

I thought of asking outright. But if it exists, he’ll have time to erase anything on it.
I’m aware it could be me being paranoid and don’t want to accuse him if I’m wrong. But at same time he has lied in the past and was scarily believeable. So no I don’t trust him 100%. I’m working on my trust issues, which he knows and understands why I have these issues.

My first thought was dr foster too. It was hidden in the boot of the car but underneath the boot liner where the spare tyre is.

Pockets of coats. Do you have kids? Could be in clothes in their rooms also

Car. Garage. Tool box. Shed

You need to think logically about this. If my DP had a second phone i would be observing his routine, some of the suggestions given could be ruled out, for example, DP never goes in DD's room as its such a mess so i know it wouldnt be in there, same as the spare room, he never goes in there, so i would rule them out, but if he started to go in these rooms it would make me suspicious and i would check them out.

We both work from home due to covid so that rules the car out, we hardly go anywhere in it.

He has a shed but hasnt been in it since he last cut the grass weeks ago, so i would rule that out, but again if he started to go in the shed i would put that on my list.

You need to observe where he is going in the house and if he is suddenly going into rooms/sheds/garages/the car more that he used to.

Why are you 'working on your trust issues' if he isn't trust worthy? If he cant be trusted then he can't be trusted. You don't have to ignore facts or your common sense. Or your instincts. If he fucked up then it's up to him to earn trust back not up to you to work on anything. You don't owe him trust ever again tbh.

Celotaped under furniture?

What is making you suspicious? Check the toes of his shoes.

Wherever it is, if there is one, it’ll be somewhere very easily accessible to have a quick look and put away again quickly and easily.

Duct taped to the underneath of a bed or desk.

Behind or underneath a drawer of something like a bedside table, it’ll be a drawer that can be quickly completely removed and put back.

Inside a boot or shoe or bag at the back of the wardrobe.

@Shoxfordian

If you don’t trust him then you need to address it with him directly

I don’t agree with this at all. If you suspect a phone, look everywhere you can for it while not acting any differently. Knowledge is power. Hope you find it.

I’d look in occasional shoes stored in a cupboard.

What has he done in the past to make you not trust him and what do you think he’s using second phone for ? Prostittues?
I think it would be somewhere you’d never think of , try all the pockets in his clothes in his wardrobe , my partner hid cocaine in his pocket or some suit trousers he never wore in his wardrobe

Hidden in a secret pocket of his work laptop backpack.

Under the corner of a rug that is out of the way somewhere? Loose floorboards? Behind a bookshelf....ooh..in a hollow book! xD or a dvd case maybe.

I can't see how you can work on trusting someone who has let you down in the past. You know he is untrustworthy.

Unless it was a small thing and you have a tendency to lack faith in others.

But thinking there is another phone suggests you have good reasons to suspect him.

How big is your home? Ours is quite large and not particularly tidy. I sometimes hide things (eg presents or food I don't want teens eating) and then can't find it myself. Assuming you're not in the same situation, be systematic and go through every room / place you can think of. Hard if he's around though.

I second coat pockets of coats I don’t wear, or underneath a drawer. I mean where you actually remove the full drawer, hide something then put the drawer back.

That’s where I used to hide my fags as a teen.

This sounds like a great way to live!

If I got to the point of hunting through the house looking for a second phone then I’d be done with the relationship anyway, there’s no trust so there’s no point

But at same time he has lied in the past and was scarily believeable. So no I don’t trust him 100%. I’m working on my trust issues, which he knows and understands why I have these issues.

You don't have trust issues. He has untrustworthy issues.

They're not the same thing.

Why do you feel its your responsibility to work on being able to trust someone who shouldn't be trusted?

What is the point in that?

If you have access to your online broadband account it will show the devices using the WiFi (if it is). You could use your phone to search for available Bluetooth connections to see if there's one (but again, it relies on that being enabled). And there are apps that pick up Bluetooth more strongly than devices do.

It could be a second sim in an existing phone.

My guess would be, if it's hidden it'll be in plain sight. In a pocket or a place you'd never think he'd dare risk leaving it.

Car, unused bags, shoes, under bedside table/drawers/wardrobe, cistern.

Has he done something before that he would need a second phone to repeat? i.e. affair, prostitute, dating apps?

See if you can find out what devices are using your wifi, it's not a surefire way of checking but if you found something you'd be able to ask him what device it was and see if he has a genuine answer.