@DustyMuse happy belated birthday for yesterday. I hope it was a good one for you. The man you've been messaging sounds like he's respectful of your wishes. Your post wasn't long winded at all, and it's great to hear that you feel able to set boundaries.
Thanks all for the kind words. In the last 5 years I've lost my dad, my aunty who was like a grandma, dh, and my mum. I think I said on the last thread that I fell into a relationship about a year after dh died. When that ended last year, not only did it feel like yet another loss, I felt as if it had distracted me from grieving properly for dh, and I suddenly had more stuff to deal with :(.
I have fab friends, and amazing dc, and I try so hard to be optimistic. I think I manage it most of the time, but every now and then I get a "no, no more, can't do it" moment. So it's wonderful to come here and share our highs and lows, and I can't remember who said it, but you are indeed all very supportive and lovely.
It's interesting that a few of us are feeling low - it makes me think of how when women live together their periods are meant to eventually synchronise! And @HairyArsedMan your words about waking up knowing there's another day of absence to get through etc were scarily accurate. You've been doing that mind reading trick again haven't you?!
for us all :)